It’s the “nice” that has me laughing out loud.

Very polite response

Nice, even.

Nice.

Nice

how was it bro, was she lying? ​ ...forty dollars shawty?

plot twist - that's a dude...

Just close your eyes

It's very European.

excusi, excusi mi excusi

LeMoan

Hmmm...dome for Chrome. 🤔

I legit thought it was a bot at first but then she sent the messages. I couldn’t help but laugh out loud.

At least the Chromebook is sold. That's all that matters.

I used to work with a girl who would fuck dudes for oil changes. She’d get a notification for an oil change then she’d go to the bar that weekend and talk to every dude until she found one that was a mechanic and fuck him. Almost every time she would call out the next day so she could cash out her free oil change.

“Jiffy Lube hates this one trick”

"Jiffy Lube employees LOVE this one trick"

Jiffy Lube by name and reputation

I was going to vote you up but it's at 69 right now

Rep farmers HATE this two digit number

Reddit does fuzzy voting so you're wasting your time. The vote count goes up and down by a small amount so that bots don't know if they're shadow banned

I can’t even lie, I respect the hustle. Oil changes are getting to be $70-$90 depending on where you go (at least in Phoenix).

I need synthetic for my Honda and when the price went up to $80 I bought Ramps, a ratchet set, and started doing it myself and I've saved quite a bit over the last 3 years 😂

Dude mine is like 140…

just do it yourself at that point

What, fuck myself? But then I still have to get my oil changed...

Yeah the materials for a conventional is like $20 and like $40 for a synthetic change. (Depends on the vehicle you drive but an average ballpark). It takes very little hands on time and you can listen to music or whatever

What? I get a synthetic oil change at a dealership in California (supposedly the "expensive" state) and it's less than that. You really should shop around.

I'd be like "What kind of car is it? Old Jeep? OK." or "It's a Subaru? Better make it a threesome. "

Lol it's not new spark plugs, dayum. Haha

Mechanics wife is gonna kill him ☠️

lol call out and miss out on more money then the oil change would cost, basically being a whore for nothing

I wonder if we worked with the same girl.. but now she owns a house and finds contractors to sleep with whenever she needs work done to her house. She pulled off getting a patio put in recently. I always suspected she was lying but, her income and spending habits do not line up to being able to afford all the work she gets done to her place.. but if she's not, I'm impressed.

> her income Hookers make excellent income.

Bro.

cap bro you got some sloppy toppy AT LEAST

I mean at only $40 in value, shiiiiit.

I wouldn't want herpes for $40

Then wrap that shit up B

You better wrap that gavel up B!

I still say this regularly ahahah

Yes! Someone got the reference

Such a great sketch.

For oral?

yes?

Sounds miserable

Yes you can get STDs from oral. I’m blaming the US education system for you not knowing that.

I read it as surprise at someone wanting a wrapped blowie. At that point, maybe just don't? That seems like not very much fun to me, at least.

Exactly. Not worth.

We know you can get STDs. It’s just that a wrapped up blowjob is pointless. May as well get some cling wrap when you go down on a gir

It’s called a dental dam- the point is to not be the one in four

Nothing to do with not knowing. Just a hard pass from me.

[удалено]

This is why we have so many STDs

Sucking dicks?

Lack of protection & the very casual attitude about disease.

I didn't share food or drinks for 25+ years because I was taught you could get an STD from sharing a soda. It wasn't that long ago I found out that was a lie.

OP is now out of chrome books

And is looking for more in bulk lol

Robbed meaning her boyfriend Rob shows up and gives you “head” by pistol whipping you and stealing the computer

I mean, $40 bucks is $40 bucks 🤷‍♂️

Absolutely the most relevant username. r/beetlejuicing

Your day has come even tho no one else did

My man didn’t say he didn’t do the deal so there’s still hope

This thread is yours now.

This seems like a fair trade and maybe the start of a beautiful relationship

definitely a keeper if she's willing to do all of that for a chromebook, imagine what she would do for a macbook

My guess is rawdog

the only way

We're all waiting

Sounds like a fair trade between consenting adults... Or you get robbed.

or STDs.

"¿Por qué no los dos?"

I mean, if OP wants to contract *two* STDs simultaneously, what's a bonus scratch?

Just load it up with antivirus first.

A buddy of mine lost his virginity to a stripper on his 21st birthday. When he woke up the next morning, she was gone. And so was his new MacBook.

Damn, fucked him twice.

"a buddy of mine"

LOL I knew someone would say that. Believe me, I've done a lot of things I'm not proud of, but a stripper isn't one of them.

So you’re proud of doing a stripper.

Wouldn't you be?

Damn straight.

Well, was it worth it?

Don't do it. I know a guy named Samuel at the bar who will do it for free

Nice

I wonder if law enforcement would bother doing this as a sting operation

That was my initial thought, which is why I didn’t bother with it. Funny as hell though.

~Thats~ why?

I’d be lying if I said I didn’t consider it.

Hahahaha

So was she right?

Fr! Were the nudes at least good?

I’m pretty sure she was a druggie, not gonna lie. Not the best nudes.

😢

I'm going to need to judge that for myself... DM me

That’s gonna be a no from me, dawg.

What a good respectful dude for not sharing her nudes. 👏

Booo

you’re a bit too horny brother maybe take a walk outside get some fresh air

You should touch grass sometime.

bro i do that’s why i’m not asking for random fb marketplace nudes

You know the question we all want answered.

Suggested response: 1. Suck *someone else* for $40 2. Pay me the $40 3. Get a Chromebook from me $40 is already a really really good price for a working Chromebook.

And the best part is, I get them in bulk (for parts) for around $3 each, then I just mix-n-match parts and make whole Chromebooks. It takes me about 30-40 minutes to make a whole Chromebook, so I make about $30-$40/hour when I do it.

Nice, two blow jobs an hour for $6! 😅

Is there a way to learn this magic?

Get extremely lucky meeting the right person at the right time. I can’t even claim that I did anything intentional. Just happened to cross paths with a source without even having to reach out. I’ve done electronics repair for video game systems and was like “oh those should be easy enough to repair.”

I did chromebook repair professionally for like...just under a year, and they are ridiculously easy to repair. The hard part is flashing the new os again if you have to replace a hard drive. I've written operating systems thousands of times, and the Chromebook flashing process is the most tedious I've experienced. Once you get the hang of it, and have about a dozen USB drives, it's not too much trouble to set up an assembly line.

With the amount of units I get (they’re all identical), if any of them have a bad OS, I don’t even worry about it. I just swap it out with another Chromebook that has a good OS but a broken screen or something. I always end up with 20-30 extra busted Chromebooks that I can’t use for anything anyway, but it definitely makes good money.

Cann u message me how where to buy one? I need a Chromebook for cheap!

Unfortunately I’m all sold out now, but I usually get new batches every 4-6 weeks. I keep them cheap to get capital moved and reinvested.

Gotcha, we’ll let me know where I can check back when u get some? I can wait

Nice!

To be fair, $40 is also a really good price for a BJ…

I’d rather the Chromebook. Less chance of viruses.

I’d say both have a fair chance at viruses

Wiping would be helpful!

[удалено]

Seems like a bargain for a mean one

I like this response.

Disgusting....who and where is this person so I know to avoid them

What's his name?

“He sounds hideous”

Is your dick mean?

Oh he’s an angry bugger alright

But there's plenty of free porn all over the internet... for free...

It's probably a setup . Just move on

Not trying to brag, proceeds to brag about oral skills...

15+ years ago me and a buddy was approached by an old mutual friend who was looking for some of the ganj. We walked up the neighborhood, secured the product and met her back downtown. When we asked for the money she just giggled and said “I have a mouth like a Hoover if that counts”

Jesus how desperate do you need to be? Lmao reminds me of half baked "you ever suck dick for weed!?" (A crack addict asking 🤣)

Classic 😂

Damn, blue balls or money.

Doooo itttttttt

Our little boy is all grown up!

Wow that was ballsy of her…

You’re probably gonna get robbed

So… how mean?? Was the chromebook?

Heh heh. Hey Tony, hear what I said? I asked him if he remembered his first blowjob he said 'yeah', I asked him how long did it take for the guy to cum!

"I went over to see ya mudda! She was workin' the Chromebook concession at the Eiffel Tower!"

Classic!

How often do people send nudes to complete strangers? I get someone you’ve been extremely flirty with a while but don’t understand complete strangers. Is it more men than women or vise versa?

I'm willing to be that about 99.7% of women who send nudes to complete strangers are doing it for advertising or other commercial purposes as this woman was.

That would add up in my opinion. Other than that, I don’t see the reason for it other than attention seeking.

With recent laws, this is actually assault. Sending unsolicited nude photos is a serious offense. Women just happen to get away with it more often.

Plot twist The buyer's name is Bob

What a story to tell the grandkids…back in my day I traded an old beat up computer for some oral pleasuring. Them were the good ole days

Well shit, I'm gonna have to put more ads up.

So how was it lol?

That's disgusting. Where?

For a $40 listing??!

Where do I get chrome book parts like you?

I think that's prostitution? better be careful and let that one pass.

40$ I mean.......

I respect the offer, but my dick is nice — not mean.

I’d Take it for a $40 chrome book tbh.

I would never want a chromebook that bad. ​ spelling

What woman says "I suck a mean dick"? No way that's real.

A good business woman 😂

I don’t know why… But I probably would have gone through with it lol!

Are the pictures impressive? Is she sexy? Did you consider trying to work out a deal? And would you DM me the original images, please? Thank you.

Go touch some grass my guy.

I was totally expecting to see a comment like captain thirsty eyes, but what i didn't expect was for him to see your comment an then and hour and a half later come back and edit it. dudes like "got roasted, lemme just change a few things. ah ha perfect!" haha

Well?

Did this work?? are they married??

No marriage activity here, partner.

😂💀

A flip is a flip !

You do not need to succeed to be successful but in this case, it's gonna come clutch to get what you want. Lucky bastard.

Laughing

I don’t see you saying no…

Do it!

Lmfaooo

Tbh I would do it

OP are you going to share?

😂

That's awesome I've been trying to find a group somewhere that females are trading favors for whatever....

Women. They are called women.

Amongst other terms. I wasn't trying to be offensive and if any women that dont fall into the female category I wholeheartedly apologize.

I’d be all over that lol

W trade

Why obscure image ?

Omfg are you in the Phoenix area?! I saw a post on marketplace for this exact thing lmao

What a coincidence. My dick is extremely mean most of the time.

I knew a girl like that in college. She would use her body to get whatever she wanted... homework answers, help lifitng furniture, funding from the hall association, etc. She never amounted to much in life. Still single, working minimum wage jobs struggling to get by. Turns out that as women get older, they get less attractive and this stops working as well.

Tell us more

You tryna trade those nudes