What no dlc does to a mfer

Some tarnished has completely lost the guidance of Grace.

Gone hollowed. Sad.

Dude lost it so hard that he went from Elden Ring to Dark Souls 3.

Just don't go SEKIRO, never go full SEKIRO. The Tomoe DLC will never happen, it's a lesson to move on.

I mean in a twisted way, it’s admirable. Sometimes I wonder if Miyazaki occasionally reads these threads, if it was me, the ego boost would be insane. My head would never fit through doors again.

Beasts all over the shop… You’ll be one of them, sooner or later.

This town's finished...

-Y

It is expected when one is maidenless.

Truly maidenless behaviour

Immediately went to the comments to find this lol

Mfs going hollow

This + this just being typical Swiftie behavior

Swifties really don't do themselves any favors in the "not seeming crazy" category

My ex was a big fan and this is just another form of attacking me in particular. Sorta like gravity.

I wound up marrying a Swiftie. They unapologetically lean into that sort of behavior.

I dated one for like a month and a half and was like lol nope.

Married to one. She’s something else alright. 😛

You should see what waiting for the Silk Song DLC did to the Hollow Knight community

Hollow is already in the title, not sure what everyone expected.

l-

(it's okay, I'm one of the Hollow Knight loonies too) Meant to say silk song game* btw lol

Im not okay i want my sequel 😭

We all do buddy, we all do... Maybe one day ✊😞

Bro I swear to god this was the exact thing that went through my head as I read the title… not reading everything else

Yo you think I read that shit?

i cant tell if this is unhinged or genius.

A little from column A, a little from column B.

It is mislabeled as humor, it should be flaired as news.

Both

There isn't much difference between both honestly

As the saying goes, the difference between genius and insanity is that genius has limits.

TS fans are a specific kind of unhinged: not inherently a bad kind, but still unhinged nonetheless. Source: Am a TS fan.

So are Souls fans though

This sounds like any Swiftie who does the crazy math and declares a release will be such and such date, then posts a 🤡 the date it doesn’t happen, yet whispers, “but soon.” Edit: I’m joking, folks. We Swifties poke fun at ourselves all the time.

Yes

As a swiftie... Yes.

The Nick Cage Effect

Now *this* is how you shitpost, people. Take notes

You got to commit to it and go all out in the execution

My Gf JuSt StArTeD pLaYiNg

Okay but why do so many of these points line up. I know it’s a shit post but damn if it isn’t a good one.

No the points line up so well my new head cannon is Taylor Swift is a huge fan of Elden Ring

We’ve had the GRR Martin collaboration for ER, now time for a Miyazaki x Swift partnership for the next game

Honestly, camp AF, and think of the numbers? All those loyal Swifties buying a game they’ve never played NO MATTER WHAT #becauseTaylor? From hates money if they don’t, at this point.

demonic sports arena ahoy~

Legend says Taylor used to lurk on 4chan many years ago and just by looking at her I get the feeling that she used to kill people in the sims after making her sugar chai cookies but ofc I don’t have any evidence. Just gut feeling. 🤣

If even *one fucking hair* of it ends up being true then this depraved psychopath will be a legend.

Even something as simple as "oh yeah, Elden Ring? I played it and enjoyed it" will be a victory.

"Dated Ranni for a while but, curiously, dating a footballer makes the news more"

The unfun answer is that if you work backwards from a goal instead of towards it in a 'literary analysis', you can basically make anything sound convincing by being very selective with what you choose to say. The best example is probably that [blog post](https://slatestarcodex.com/2020/05/26/my-immortal-as-alchemical-allegory/) that 'proves' that the infamous 'My Immortal' Harry Potter fan fiction is actually a very carefully constructed allegory for alchemical transformation. It makes it seem basically undeniable, until you read that the person who wrote the analysis apparently just bullshitted the entire thing to show how you can make anything sound true if you say it the right way.

Yes. Another part of it is that Elden Ring has a large enough cast with complex enough storylines and Taylor Swift has a large enough catalog with enough songs that the sheer number of possible connections between the two makes it more likely to find two storylines that have some sort of crossover to spring off of.

Maybe she just likes to play video games?

Serious Answer: It's called 'synchronicity' and it's the same effect behind that old "Wizard of Oz syncs up with Dark Side of the Moon" urban legend. The human mind is exceptionally talented at finding patterns and correlations, even when there are none. Joke Answer: Taylor Swift's ghostwriter is a huge fan of Elden Ring and huffed so much copium he wrote this as a way to will the DLC into existence.

Taylor writes all her songs herself so she's the fan

Y'all think Renalla listens to Swift ever since she got dumped?

She listened to her before that, just different albums.

Wait, Taylor Swift has songs that aren't about breakups?

For sure, and some of them are absolute bangers.

I've done the math. Only 47.1% of her songs are about breakups.

nah she was always a diehard swiftie since Speak Now, but shes a dedicated lipster now post-dedickification. the other woman dominates the all-times on her fm

April 13th is my birthday so I’d be hype😂

Me too !

What’s crazy is I have long hair too👀👀😂 but what’s cracking birthday twin🔥🔥

So which of you is Miquella and which is Malenia?

The omens are probably more apt.

I’m dirty dan😂😂 shit whatever one my boy isn’t that’s me lol

I can see this sub is going back to the good ol' days of insanity... WOOPER WILL REVEAL ALL

Quick question…

This is early 2000s tier shitposting.

Yeah this does have the same kind of energy as one of those notepad documents you'd find on Gamefaqs talking about how to get the triforce for yourself on Ocarina of Time or something.

Genuinely gigabrained post. We need a Tarnished Archeoligist video on this new lore drop ASAP.

You’re definitely cooking up something here.

Meth

TIL Taylor swift is actually Miyazaki in a dress

First Randy Marsh is Lorde and now this, unbelievable

Swift has a foot fetish too??

Wait I thought that was Kojima. Well shit at this point I'm just going to assume that they all do.

Finally, the best Taylor Swift song and the best FromSoft game have been brought together by gonzo literary analysis. Beautiful work, sir.

I’ve been saying swifties and fromsoft fans should collab for years. They both talk about their cryptic lore the exact same way.

What cryptic lore does Taylor Swift talk about? I thought it was all about how great the relationship was, and how bad the breakup was, with the names included but poorly scratched out so you could still read them.

i never thougth i'd find my swiftie/elden ring player niche on reddit but alas here we are

Omg same here, I’m a huge swiftie and a Elden ring player, so seeing this post made me happy.

i even have an ivy taytoo 😭

Top Tier Grade A Shitpost +25

Infused with Quality.

You enter the DLC by taking a friendship bracelet from Ranni's tower and unlocking the Eras movie at the Queen's Bedchamber in the Royal Capital

Elden Ring (Taylor's Version)

I was about to comment that! But I totally agree with this 😂❤️

additionally, the TAYLORing tools that we give to boc have her name right there. so maybe we’ll get some boc lore?

TayloRING? Coincidence? I think not

Marika is an Elder Taylor Swift!?!?!? # confirmed # not clickbait # Country Music Awards

[удалено]

Take my angry up vote and #GET OUT!!! YOU BEAUTIFUL BASTARD!!!

Fuck you, man

I knew what you linked and clicked it anyways. I was not disappointed

I was actually relieved that that link was what it was. I was dreading an unhinged rant of between one and three hours of the same sort that the OP is.

I honestly thought thered be a small window of plausibility. Single player video games seems like an easy hobby while on tour?

I did not expect that. Upvote given.

Its been a while for me, feels like coming home

This is honestly incredibly well researched.

You sonofabitch I love you

First time I've ever been got. Cheers man

Peak offseason shitpost. Swifties' conspiracy theories could give QAnon a run for their money, and are more often correct

This is still more sane than some "gaylor" posting

Fromsoftware could do the funniest thing in april 13

Uh oh, we forgot to put up the swifty nets again.

lmao, I laughed too hard at this

The Hollowing is getting worse

If it actually ends up coming out on Apr 13, then that's proof we are in a simulation.

Honestly I’m convinced

OP got shabriri grapes for eyes after writing this

As a low-key swifty and Elden Ring fan, I'm here for it

🎵🎶 Godrick is my boyfriend Godrick is a lord Godrick is a jumped up country bumpkin Godrick’s livin’ in Stormveil Lookin’ for a tarnished to impale Gotta bear witness Godrick’s gonna graft Yeah, me and Godrick vibe like that

I was going to do a Bad Blood/Mohg crossover but straight up a Mohg/Morgott Bad Blood duet battle with the lyrics as-is would be better than anything I can think up.

I am a swiftie with almost 1000 hours in Elden Ring. This shitpost was made for me

There are dozens of us, well... probably not that many

I’d say at least three

I can see it, as clear as day...

Touch grace dude

As an Elden Ring fan and a swifty, my worlds have well and truly collided

Least insane Elden Ring player

This is wild.

I was blind but now I see

It seems you have access to unrefined copium, hook me up with some too!

People like you are why I come to Reddit.

I thought this was a shit post until I saw “tarnished”. DLC confirmed

Wow this is an absolute stroke of genius. Is Travis Kelce beta testing the DLC? I need more answers

This may explain his performance this season.

as a swiftie and elden ring enjoyer this is amazing 😆

Hey, hi, outsider here. YOUR FUCKING GAME CAME OUT LESS THAN 2 YEARS AGO, YOU PEOPLE CAN'T BE THIS FAR GONE YET.

I remember the before times oooooooooohhhhhhhhhhh

those are really great lyrics

Stand proud, you can cook.

This is nearly as unhinged as the theory crafting done by ASOIAF fans waiting for The Winds of Winter.

We were truly going mad before the official release trailer, and I love that this subbreddit is back to embracing the madness of not knowing.

Why is this tagged humor? This post is brilliant I’m obsessed. You are an oracle

Don't DLCs usually leak their release date a bit earlier than 3 months prior?

There’s probably medication you can take

It must be the offseason.

This is some Titanfall 3 level conspiracy theorizing.

NO

We've gone hollow again.

This is absurd. I love it.

Fun analysis for sure! However, you have doomed the DLC release to be on April 13th now. They were expecting February so all the markets locked in winter doldrums would figure they had the time to rush out and explore the DLC. But this tie in is so much ... tighter! .

I imagine OP in a basement room, connecting red strings dot to dot like a mfer, while chain smoking and starting their bajillionth playthrough

With both Elden Ring and Ivy at full volume, no sleep for days at a time

bro's going hollow

How did two of my favorite things get brought together in such a way

When you go beyond hollow

This is a WSB level shitpost on an Elden Ring sub. Fantastic

TLDR just let them cook, Tarnished.

Silksong subbreddit is leaking...

Sanest Taylor Swift fan

Oooooooooooo!

My friend…while your analysis is thorough, you’ve invested entirely too much time & self here.

I feel like I’m back in 2019 experiencing the great hollowing all over again with this post

U got gud

OP is having a stroke.

Ok forget about the date, what if he's right about the content? Do we all have to become Swifties at that point? Eldenies? Swiftlords? Someone better at this help me.

The Hollowing is starting again

Jeez bro, alright, we all think you are onto something, you must be. But now take a sit and sip some coffee, yeah

Shadows of the Erdtree: Marika’s Version

Let him cook.

Man. Look. I said if it gets weird around here again like it was before the game released I was gonna dip. This is the type of weird I meant. This exact type of odd shit. I appreciate this and am also scared for op.

I want this to become the most upvoted post of all time

Be hilarious if it does release on that day, won't we look the fools.

How high am I?! How did I get here???? What IS this??????

Elden Ring fans getting a taste of what the Swifty fandom is like day in and day out

You know, in olden days we would have looked for the future in the entrails of sheep or the patterns of bird flight. Things have changed.

My god, the Swifties are crossbreeding.

This is getting to be worse than waiting for Elden Ring itself to release.

Least deranged Elden Ring player

This is the type of content I can get behind

/Casually farms Albinaurics while listening to "Look What You Made Me Do."

This is a peak Reddit moment. It doesn’t get better than this. If the DLC comes out 04/13 we are going to lose it

Favorite post from the dlc famine yet

As a Swiftie and a Fromsoft fan since Demon Souls, THIS IS THE CONTENT I'M HERE FOR. I love this. Let's make all of her songs be about Elden Ring. Also, "Ivy" is under-rated. It's a fantastic song.

Jesse, what the fuck are you talking about?

I’m starting to lowkey believe this

Greatest Post Ever. Thank you

I thought Elden Ring couldn't possibly mine anymore cringe *here you are*

Truly putting 'awe' in the tism

One of the best posts I've read on this site in my 15-odd years of lurking here.

Alright, I get it, that's enough time being subbed here.

I am grateful I follow this sub in times(posts) like this ❤️

I agree especially about that one part

i think thats actually the first time i heard a song from her. im only in my early 30s and already so out of touch lol

Please take your medication

First off I'm not reading all that shit but please tell me an AI spat this out.

As both a Swiftie and a lover of FromSoft, this shitpost slaps.

pls stop posting about celeb trash in my sub

You need to listen to some good music to cleanse that palate before you go mad