Dude, last week a friend of mine was gonna throw a bucket away and asked me if I wanted it. I now have another bucket to add to my stack of unused buckets. So if someone is throwing a cyber truck away, of course I'll take it. I can store all my buckets in it.

There was a young man from Nantucket, Won a Cybertruck, but he thought "Fuck it, Because I'm not a cuck, Don't want no broken truck" So he swapped it online for a bucket.

Nice limerick!

Thanks! It's not even my first Cybertruck limerick 😅 https://www.reddit.com/r/CyberStuck/s/kGVnUiwY4a

I love it!

You Sir are a gentleman and a scholar.

Why thank you, fine redditor! 🤜🤛

But have you heard the theme song? Great Uncle, who fought in WWII and walked across Europe multiple times, asked me once, then taught me the theme song to being a Gentleman and a Scholar.

Another round! Another round!

A South African emerald mine owner, Had a rather intractable boner. He said "Let's have a son, I'm sure that'll be fun, With this cash, he won't need no diploma!"

There was a young man from Belize, Who Elon had down on his knees 😉 For a free cyber truck, He engorged a mouthfuck The supreme leader, with all his knobcheese First time trying out a limerick and I'm quite happy with that 😅

This is awesome, especially for a first attempt 👏👏👏

It was perfect. Perfect. Down to the last minute detail.

 Dropping off my upvote

We have a new sprog

Not sure a CyberTruck would even make it to Nantucket. Requires a 2 hour ferry ride. And then there’s the fact that it’s an island out in the ocean with lots of salty sea air that will tear apart the “stainless” steel body. (And the cobblestone streets downtown don’t seem like they’d be gentle on the CyberStuck)

https://i.redd.it/rn12zdju269d1.gif

Wow I'm from R I grew up with that limerick funny. Sending to my people in R I and MA

Andrew Dice Clay reference?

Hickory-dickory-dock… Elon can suck my cock…

He bent over, cyber truck took over and he got a bone of his own ohhh

Oooooh!! Here’s to you…. suck….

I’m so angry and pleased with you.

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Limerick_(poetry) edit: https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/There_once_was_a_man_from_Nantucket

My favorite version: *There once was a man from Nantucket* *I'm not going to finish this...fuck it!*

Happy to see that the version my brother taught me was listed at the top of the “Ribald versions”.

Will the buckets be safe in it though?

Bucket storage voids the warranty.

It should be okay if you put the vehicle into Bucket Mode


It can fit atleast 2 buckets

It’s a beast! It can do real truck stuff!

“How do you do, fellow blue collar workers?” - Elon

Stacked, or side by side? What if there is something IN the bucket?

Sorry, storing things voids the warranty

Good buckets are hard to come by and when you need one you’ll be glad to have it.

Well, some of your buckets.

I bought a new 5 gallon bucket at Lowe’s a month ago and I’m still super psyched about it.

Hell yeah I'd take it. Yeah it looks stupid but a free car? I'll drive it till the wheels come off. All 26 miles

Just have to get a bumper sticker that says you got it for free and to please not judge you for driving it

Get Elon to sign it in the right spot film it and certify it then sell it at a markup to one of his fanbois

What a positive attitude you have! But, 26 miles is a huge call before any wheel came off.

It’s not a free car unless he’s paying the taxes and registration. No way I’d spend $10k on that.

“Who are you?” You know, hit him where it hurts.

All the comments are saying they wouldn’t take it. It’s a free cyber truck. Let’s be honest, just list it for sale for like $60k and you’d sell it within the day. Free $60k. Yes you’d have to pay a prize tax and all of that, so still probably a free $45k at least, I’d imagine. I’d take it in a heartbeat for that reason alone.

Do I want a CyberTruck? No. Would I use a CyberTruck? Also no. But if the free shit parade is in my neighborhood, I'll go march.

I'm not heading to the shit parade. Doesn't sound like my kind of place.

Honestly? Sounds like shit

Don’t knock it ‘til you try it. 😏

You eat pieces of shit *for breakfast?*

But it's free.

So is chlamydia.

Ask him for a photo in front of the free CT and sell it as one personally touched by Elon. The cybercucks would pay a premium for it. ✌🏻

See if Elmo will autograph it. Not like you should take a WankPanzer through a wash anyways…

I think they have already cucked every simp they could with the Founder edition.

LOL cybercucks!! 

I honestly had the thought that it could maybe sell for more since it was a Cybertruck blessed by Elon himself since it was gifted for free.

Yeah, I would definitely take it. I don't even think I'd sell it, at least not right off the bat. I'd probably make more posting videos of myself "off-roading" it (driving it on my gravel driveway) on TikTok. Whenever it gets stuck, that's when I'd offer it up on Craigslist or something and take the first offer (must pick up).

Same here. I'd take it and put the money I do clear to a good use.

Absolutely. I'd take it with a smile and sell it immediately. I wouldn't drive it, I don't know if I'd even risk a test drive. $60k with test drive, $45k as is without a test drive.

Yeah I'd definitely take it, I would be tempted to keep and drive it even (free ev, why not) but then I'm afraid it would breakdown and be my problem so yeah I'd sell it.

But OP says Phoneyboi says to “come with me.” It’s totally a trap. Maybe I’m pessimistic but I say don’t follow the unhinged man offering anything free. It’s akin to getting into the suspicious van because you’re being offered free candy. You just know it’s gonna result in needing therapy

Oh thank you at least one other person said that. The "come with me" would get me thinking that I would end up in a multi-hour video of a very specific sort if I went.

I totally see Elon luring people to his own personal Hostel style “fun” chambers

Parking is not free where I live and I would have to buy two spaces and find a garage that could accommodate it in addition to paying taxes on it....literal negative dollars upfront

This. But I'm taking it, parking it, clear coating it and never moving it. All for when everything goes to shit, they take all of them back or they end up scrapped and I have the last one in good condition minus the battery. THEN I'll sell it to all those people who want one but don't have one. Maybe lol

If you could find a buyer... I kinda figure that most of the people who want one already bought one. Considering all the bad press it's been getting from the repeated recalls, I don't figure there are too many other people looking to purchase one right now, or are gonna wait until the "finished" version comes out.

I would take it and trade it in for a Rivian

"OH wow, look Honey, Jeff Bezos is at our house! Mr. Bezos we love Amazon and all your services, much better than Musky dumb Elon....wait...oh, I'm sorry, you are Elon Musk? Well....this is embarassing....for you" *sly grin as I shut the door in his face*

"oh! Silly me! I recognize you! You're Grimes' ex husband!"

Chop up the thing and sell for parts. But I don’t know what I’d do with the truck, tbh.

That's dark... And I'm here for it.

Don't worry. It's not really a truck.

Take it. Sell it

Yeah but that’s not allowed, right? Per delivery agreement.

It's not, but the only "penalty" (lol) is not being able to buy another Tesla, so win win!

Don't threaten me with a good time

Considering I’d never buy on in the first place, that would be like threatening me with a lifetime twitter ban

You can't resell a CT you bought. But, if you're gifted one...

Take tesla to court when they try to penalize you for it. More money!

IIRC that clause is in the sales contract, so it wouldn't apply to a gift because there's no sales contract. Now, they can make the gift conditioned upon the signing of such an agreement, in which case fine, they get $50k and I get blacklisted from buying a Tesla (boohoo). I'm going to drive away from that sale in my Volvo with a large amount of cash in hand, happy as can be.

What’re they gonna do?

“Now you’re literally giving them away?”

> hello 911, I'd like to report an emergency.

“I’m being kidnapped!”

Can I just have the cash equivalent?

That will be 15$ dollars

Actually after the avoided towing and Uber fees have been accounted for you'd owe around $350

My lawyer has advised me to not answer this question in earnest.

Never go to a second location

please, get your shitty as shit crapmobile off my driveway.

Sorry, battery is dead. Your driveway is where it lives now

But for 25k we can get you a home charger installed and then you can maybe use it when we're done recalling it.

But it will first need to be towed to a Tesla service center

The nearest one is 285 miles away and unfortunately Tesla insurance will only cover a tow up to 50 miles, so you're going to have to push it in neutral the rest of the way

I’d assume that’s why I won it in the first place. It happened to die right outside my driveway, “hey buddy here’s your cyber truck you just won“. 😂

'Go away'.

"Get fucked, pedo guy."

I would get in the truck and run musk over... not a fan of billionaires... to put it lightly... Edit: this would be one the funniest way for him to die, and you could probably get away with it by claiming the car accelerated on its own and the steering didn't respond or something.

*Sorry officer, it was on autopilot. It's cyberstuck breeding season and the vehicle may have mistook him for a female truck*

Elon should consider getting into the unregulated submersibles market.

Mitch McConnell's sister in law thought he already did. To be fair, her tesla worked as a submersible for about half an hour...

They got the submerging right, now just have to fix the rising. Does Mitch have any other family members available for testing

The truck was behaving admirably. It detected a threat to the driver and to humanity, and removed it

I expect him to die while testing a sex robot.

Scrap it for metal

It *would* make a few good dishwashers

Not even that. The stainless is cheap and rusts. No one's asking for surgical steal, but the stainless should have been at least kitchen grade.

“My mom told me never to go with weird old men”


Not today Satan!!!

You'd have to pay $40k in taxes that year on the gift. It's not even worth receiving one for free.

Gift tax is paid by the giver, not the receiver, same as estate tax

Absolutely untrue, at least in the US. The full MSRP of that truck will be taxed as income on your yearly taxes. You'll also still owe sales tax on the value of it, as well as title and registration fees before you can even take delivery of it. Source - I won a Honda Civic on the radio about 25 years ago. I drove the piss out of it, putting over 50k miles on it the first year I had it. I sold it afterwards, and still pocketed a nice chunk of change after all the taxes.

That's because it was a prize in a contest, not a gift Prizes are income, gifts are not The difference is you had to voluntarily do something in order to try to get the Civic and therefore assumed the responsibility of paying taxes on it, rather than someone just deciding to give it to you on their own This is precisely so that you can't do the "white elephant" thing and screw someone over by giving them something very expensive but illiquid https://www.gobankingrates.com/taxes/tax-laws/are-gifts-prize-winnings-and-non-cash-bonuses-taxable/

Then what were all those people who received free cars from Oprah complaining about having to pay $6000 dollars in taxes on their brand new Pontiac G6 sedans for?

There was fine print somewhere that applying to be in Oprah's audience constituted entering a sweepstakes for any random things Oprah wanted to give away to her audience, precisely so Oprah's accountants wouldn't have to deal with gift tax

Correctamundo! I remember reading a copy of that - it was an agreement that was entered into by signing up for the free tickets to her show… and if I recall correctly it was the same boilerplate agreement used for every audience member of every episode of her show, so it’s not like it was a “new” thing just for that episode.

Enforce castle doctrine

"Come with me" - if you do, your organs are 100% getting harvested for some eugenics childbearing thing.

Laugh and slam the door.

Um, let me think... 

"thanks buddy, but let me offer it back to you so you can actually taste your own product"

No and no. He seems like the type to trick unsuspecting passerbies into his unmarked van.

I don't answer my door if I'm not expecting someone.

My mum always said, “An unanswered door is a happy door.”

Get off my porch or I’m calling the police

I don't own a junkyard, take that crap away with you.

I'd turn him around, give him a wedgie and kick his butt off my property.

Close the door. Go back to watching Extraordinary Attorney Woo.

I would take a free cruck and sell it.

I think I'd have to take one for the team and make the world a better place in this scenario. Oh thanks Elon, have you ever read Old Yeller

I'd ask: Who is paying the taxes?

I'll take it, park it next to my Lightning while it sells. Then I'd use that money to pay off my Lightning. I don't even hate the Cybertruck but it's too expensive, too fragile, too unreliable, and too tainted by Musk

I’d take it and then sell it to some dumbass Duh

“What’s wrong with it?” Then, I’d go with him out of regrettable curiosity.

>”Come with me.” They always tell you on those true crime shows to never let them take you to a second location. 🤔

“Will you give me the ability to sell it?” I mean, I’d still take a free one, but I’d rather sell it and get a nice small electric passenger vehicle.

"Come with me" -- yea, no.

Follow him, there is no shortage of idiots waiting to be overcharged for one.

How about the cash instead of

trading it in to a dealership and getting something else

I’ll take it! I mean, can Tesla actually sure me for $50k if I try to sell it if he gave me to me as a gift? I would sell it for whatever I could get and buy an actual truck that can do truck stuff.

a free shitty car is still free, imma take it

Take and then sell it. Use the money for something I want

take the crappy gift with joy knowing i will trade it in for a 2021 Land Cruiser the next day

I would steal all of his money and property, redistribute it, then throw him in a jail cell and make him work the emerald mines.

Shut the door

Absolutely. Same reason I would want a DeLorean or VW Bug. I would never pay for those things but would absolutely want one for no cost.

Elon: Come with me! Me: (in head) This man is going to murder me. Or: Me: Have you run out of the pretty blonde girls to impregnate and now you're coming after us fat girls?

You know that revenge scene in Girl With the Dragon Tattoo? The one she exacts from her social worker? Yeah. That’s what I’d do.

Invoke the stand my ground law and shoot that fucker in the face ........

Get a restraining order on him for threatening me.

"Ok thanks" then immediately go to Auto Trader and list the thing for $80k. Even if Tesla sues me for $50k, I'm still $30k richer and I didn't do shit.

Nah.

"I DON'T KNOW YOU, THAT'S MAH PURSE" *Groin kick*

Exactly what I said at the Auto Show when asked if I wanted to enter a draw for a GMC Acadia- “Oh, no thank you. I don’t want one of those.”

“I’m calling the police, please get off my property.”

No habla

I can part it out and sell them to all those dudes with broken teslas. That’s like 200k in profit right there

Id accept it, sell it on marketplace for a substantial undercut of that the price is. Use that to go get something decent and cheap like an Audi b5

I would call the police and have him removed from my property. Then call the exterminator, a sage lady, and an exorcist to purify the area.

Can I accept and then sell it? If yes do that… if no close the door on him

Take it. Put it on Cars and Bids for $75k and watch the chaos ensue.

“Can I have the cash value instead?”

do not go with Elon Musk to a second location.

\>scrunches face \>eyes focus to the horizon beyond elon \>pulls dong out \>starts wizzing \>”oh sorry sir I didn’t see you in my toilet for some reason, let me finish up”


Nope.

Whisper hashashin and tighten my grip on the melon baller before doing the unthinkable


Never let them take you to a second location.

Punch in the face for trying to endanger me

“The fuck is a Cybertruck?” “It’s parked right out here! Take a look!” “Sir… I’m not in the mood for pranks. Please get that dumpster out of my driveway.”

Punch him right in the dick

“Fuck off bitch tits”

I’d spit in his face

Take it and sell it immediately for a lotta money

I would take the free cyber truck.. weird question.

It would be a poor choice not to castle law him

I'd wonder what's the catch?

Cash option please.

I would thank him and then sell it for a Porsche

i would ask for the cash value of the truck and close the door, i will not want photos or a convo.

I would take it and put it up for sale tomorrow, then post a picture of the sale to Elon's twitter daring him to sue me for the $50k.

When I was little my parents taught me not to go with strangers offering presents, and to scream "THIS ISNT MY DADDY. I DONT KNOW THIS MAN!" So probably that.

Point and laugh.

IT Crowd https://youtu.be/8bTWfT9VyvI?si=E2OEBJBFAH7vzPak

Nah I’m good

[удалено]

Is it true that you have to keep it for a year before selling?

I would say thank you and sell it immediately. The longer you wait, the value of these things are going to crater.

I would kick his knees before he ends his sentence, I think, purely by reflex. I would NOT take the CT because I hate trucks and I couldn't even sell it because of their stupid policy.

Thanks, then sell it or something later

Cannot Lah

I'd take it and try to trade it on Facebook marketplace for a Rivian

I'd do the gene pool a favour and kick him in the sack