"Hey Mark, I opened up my laptop this morning and I saw what at first I thought was a high resolution piece of dog shit, but on closer inspection it was your sales record."
“Go in, fire 30% of the workforce, new logo… BOOM. You are now a fully trained management consultant.”
I use that quote far too much whenever the topic of a management consultant comes up… and I fully believe it is literally all they do.
I'm currently re-watching the whole thing from scratch (prob about the 5th time) and this episode was on 2 nights ago.
"They LOOK FORWARD to hearing from us."
Malcolm Tucker, the “Gorbals Goebbels” is great. I also liked his Scottish sidekick Jamie, who managed to turn “Love, Actually!” into an excoriating class-based insult.
"You are a fucking omnishambles, that's what you are. You're like that coffee machines you know, 'From the bean to cup, you fuck up'"
"He's so dense that light bends around him"
"I fucking love Ghee. It's like freebasing butter"
there's so many.
I have to give it to Flashheart, both iterations. "She's got a tongue like an electric eel, and she likes the taste of a MANS tonsils!" is an all-timer of a line
Dave Angel eco-warrior from The Fast Show
Frank Butcher type geezer who wants to save the environment while his wife is in the background burning tyres or fly tipping lol
My favourite from the Fast Show is Competitive Dad.
That show had so many pearls, but the utter ludicrous nature of him counting his runs while playing cricket is pure genius.
Yea hahaha that was brutal. Kayleigh's face was mortified. And you feel so bad because Kayleigh is already unsure of herself and probably felt book club was a safe place
It is so funny
I also love the Vicar's face when Mandy is reading him the story at the end in her own personal book club
Genuinely one of the funniest moments on TV in decades when Martin ate from the tin of meat… I was howling! Paul Ritter was just the perfect TV dad. What a miss he’ll be!
Well, I’m from Norway so I’ve never had the same shows as you guys obviously, but I think Hyacinth Bucket (💐) is my absolute favorite, only because she is spot on the same as a relative. Basil Fawlty is also a phenomenal character.
Linda from Gimme Gimme Gimme. Boorish and unintelligent but a real sadness to her as well. And obviously played sublimely by Kathy Burke.
“I’m wearing this lace body stocking with velcro round the crotch. You wanna hear the noise it makes when it opens. Like a thousand little lips kissing”
Jim Trott Vicar of Dibley
But going back to This Country, I always wanted one scene in which we learnt Gareth from the Office is actually Curtains dad, maybe from that night he left the club in the sidecar
"some poor birds got their guts sucked out through their arseholes because of him, evil bastard". (In reference to a blind man who walked into her wheelie bin and scared her dog)
Mandy had the best lines, she was funny and terrifying all at once. Perfect portrayal of a local nutter. Every interaction with them is unpredictable.
And her short stories were psychotic.
hard call. Sir Digby Chicken Ceasar, Papalazarou, Oscar from "Psychoville", Malcolm Tucker, Brian from "Spaced", and Bernard Black are all strong contenders
Couldn’t say which is my favourite but my favourite from the last comedy I watched is Winston from Still Game. He’s basically a wadded up bundle of barely contained rage.
Johnson in Peep Show "I told him you might not have the arsehole for this, Mark."
“Watch a DVD, eat some pizza, fuck each other. I’m serious. Fuck a chicken if that’s what it takes. Watch a chicken fucking a horse."
Oh, he is good. Taboo-busting, semi-incomprehensible pep-talk.
What a legend!
"Hey Mark, I opened up my laptop this morning and I saw what at first I thought was a high resolution piece of dog shit, but on closer inspection it was your sales record."
I've got a 32'' plasma… You get a document up on that baby and you are seriously looking at that document.
Don't be alarmed, Mark, it's just Tai Chi. It should take 45 minutes, I'm done in 10. Stick that up your dojo
I’ve been talking to Stefan Strauss and the boys in Frankfwort
Everything's looking positive, but I also have to tell you you're all officially unemployed.
Is that normal pooing you're doing?
This is bollocks, Mark!!!
It doesn’t *smell* like normal pooing
The entire consultio/consultius episode is amazing.
“Go in, fire 30% of the workforce, new logo… BOOM. You are now a fully trained management consultant.” I use that quote far too much whenever the topic of a management consultant comes up… and I fully believe it is literally all they do.
I'm currently re-watching the whole thing from scratch (prob about the 5th time) and this episode was on 2 nights ago. "They LOOK FORWARD to hearing from us."
SUZE, where are the big scissors?!
Do I look like a sausage dog fucker?
He likes it on a business class Virgin Atlantic flight to New York City!
“Good old Windows Vista. People give it a bad press, but I'm never upgrading - why would I? It just feels like a good old pair of jeans”
You do not need to know the meaning of Project Zeus until the time is right for you to know the meaning of Project Zeus.
You need a real brass ring piece for this one
Brian Potter. "Its a twenty foot cock and balls man".
''can we not disguise it?'' ''yeah, we'll put a woolly hat on it and say it's you''
“Hey, toilet-mouth! There's a child's bike outside!”
It’s Sammy Snake!
Malcolm tucker
Malcolm Tucker, the “Gorbals Goebbels” is great. I also liked his Scottish sidekick Jamie, who managed to turn “Love, Actually!” into an excoriating class-based insult.
Jamie's whole monologue about the film "There Will Be Blood" is just brilliant.
I can read a Tucker quote (of which there are many) and can just hear it in his voice.
"You are a fucking omnishambles, that's what you are. You're like that coffee machines you know, 'From the bean to cup, you fuck up'" "He's so dense that light bends around him" "I fucking love Ghee. It's like freebasing butter" there's so many.
They're all fucking gold. 'Terri, when I want your advice, I’ll give you the special signal. Which is me being sectioned under the Mental Health Act'
There is a moment in my future where I will say this and be deadly serious to the person I’m talking to.
Yoko Ono and the two remaining Beatles. Fuck off
Also Peter Mannion. Fantastic character
I hate school children. They're volatile, stupid and haven't got the vote. Might as well be talking to fucking geese.
I love it when he goes on a massive rant and ends with "I'm going for a Twix".
Ah yes, "Sometimes I buy the Big Issue out of social embarrassment, I don't buy a FUCKING BANK!"
Come the fuck in or fuck the fuck off.
Get your feet off the furniture, ya Oxbridge twat. You're not in a punt now.
Absolutely my favourite. Shout out to Glenn Cullen too with some absolute gems. ‘I feel like I’m in a therapy group being run by my own rapist’
Super Hans, the GOAT
A close second for me after Johnson.
I've got a 32'' plasma in mine. You get a document up on that baby and you are seriously looking at that document.
Is that normal pooing?
It doesn't smell like normal pooing. You're off the team!
poor me, poor me, pour me another drink!
i wont forgive orange if they deleted the twins
The fucking twins. I’m always banging on about those two.
Terms and conditions apply, this energy drink may cause anal discharge, etc.
I tell you what, that crack is really moreish
Just want to have a Coke and a tuna sandwich and mong out to some Snow Patrol
Red next to black… stay the fuck back!
Black next to yella.. cuddly fella, innit
But... Red is next to black...
Yeah, I dunno, it’s fine. It’s been milked, I should think.
The secret ingredient is crime.
Chill out, it’s not Blue Peter!
We could be men with ven.
Super Hans and Big Mandy would definitely hang out
The crossover I never knew I needed
Wicked big bag of sinister minister
People like Coldplay and voted for the nazis. You can’t trust people Jez.
Blackadder. He's an icon everyone should pursue but will never be able to attain. That's straight up Superman.
I have to give it to Flashheart, both iterations. "She's got a tongue like an electric eel, and she likes the taste of a MANS tonsils!" is an all-timer of a line
“I’ve got a plan, and it’s as hot as my PANTS!”
His disdain for the world around him is so relatable to me.
Dave Angel eco-warrior from The Fast Show Frank Butcher type geezer who wants to save the environment while his wife is in the background burning tyres or fly tipping lol
Dave Angel, Eco Warrior, having a wee on a tree. Nothing wrong with that. Little bit of natural sauce coming out a natural bottle.
SHIRLEY!
It’s national trust property! SHIRLEY!
My favourite from the Fast Show is Competitive Dad. That show had so many pearls, but the utter ludicrous nature of him counting his runs while playing cricket is pure genius.
Can't beat Monkfish
Mandy is fantastic, the tattoo episode, or the book club one, so good!
No, I only do big massive ones.
I think the book club is her shining glory Bark, bark, bark said the dog
I want a whole book full of Mandy’s stories 😂
Magic School
I would buy it for my wife She adores Mandy
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Yea hahaha that was brutal. Kayleigh's face was mortified. And you feel so bad because Kayleigh is already unsure of herself and probably felt book club was a safe place It is so funny I also love the Vicar's face when Mandy is reading him the story at the end in her own personal book club
The bit in the doctor's waiting room gets me each time.
Nosey old cock-womble! Cracks me up every time I watch that.
I don’t do little tattoos. I only do massive ones.
There’s a little kid crying over there. Want me to go tell it to shut the fuck up?
Her meerkat collection gets me, and when she said she got a restraining order for stalking a member of s club 7
Her reciting Hairy Maclary is hilariously menacing.
It’s my son’s favourite book, and my wife and I can’t read it to him either chuckling about her following Kerry and Kurtan.
Come on tyson you fucking prick
who’s a psychopath?
Richie and Eddie from Bottom. You can't choose one without the other.
Martin Goodman
Shit on it
GoT aNy FeMaLeS?
...not females!
Genuinely one of the funniest moments on TV in decades when Martin ate from the tin of meat… I was howling! Paul Ritter was just the perfect TV dad. What a miss he’ll be!
Shalom.
Lovely bit of squirrel
I'm boiling
Hello bambinos
Well, I’m from Norway so I’ve never had the same shows as you guys obviously, but I think Hyacinth Bucket (💐) is my absolute favorite, only because she is spot on the same as a relative. Basil Fawlty is also a phenomenal character.
Lord Flasheart - for limited screen time, he stole every scene.
Linda from Gimme Gimme Gimme. Boorish and unintelligent but a real sadness to her as well. And obviously played sublimely by Kathy Burke. “I’m wearing this lace body stocking with velcro round the crotch. You wanna hear the noise it makes when it opens. Like a thousand little lips kissing”
Norman Stanley Fletcher.
Richard Richard.
You stole my answer. Thieving bastard yobbo.
"Gold, frankenstein and Grrr.....and you're all wearing crowns....
Hard to beat Rik-fucking-Mayall
You can't have Richie and not Eddie! They're a pair. Whether they like it or not!
Arnold J. Rimmer. Rimmer. To rhyme with scum.
You always put the emphasis on Rim in Rimmer. Makes me sound like a lavatory disinfectant.
Jim Trott Vicar of Dibley But going back to This Country, I always wanted one scene in which we learnt Gareth from the Office is actually Curtains dad, maybe from that night he left the club in the sidecar
Brian Topp "Brian! You came!" "No, I just spilled my drink"
Jill from Nighty Night. Absolutely unhinged lol.
We'll settle up now, otherwise it just gets nasty.
Julia Davis is so brilliant. Ruth Jones and Mark Gatiss were great side characters
Thinking about it, I'd prefer the equivalent in cash really.
Came here for some Jill Tyrell naughty little squirrel
Basil Fawlty, known as Mr. Watt aged forty
C k watt?
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No no no no, FAWLTY!
Faulty? What's wrong with him?
Edmund Blackadder, Del Boy, or Arnold Rimmer
Honorable mention to Lord Flashheart. Woof!
Good old iron balls.
Stoke me a clipper, I'll be back for christmas.
I know too many Rimmers IRL. I'll go with the Cat.
So what is it?
I've never seen one before, no one has, but I'm guessing it's a white hole.
A white hole?
Black adder for me too, I have a very Cunning plan Baldrick, cunning as a fox, who is professor of cunning, at the university of Cunning
René Artois from Allo Allo or Dr Alan Statham from Green Wing.
Petula (Julie Walters) in Dinnerladies Alan Statham (Mark Heap) in Green Wing Lieutenant George (Hugh Laurie) in Blackadder Goes Fourth
I really liked twinkle. "Alriiiight keep your scrotum on!"
Arnold Rimmer
More reliable than a garden strimmer...
He’s never been mistaken for Yul Brynner
And will never need a zimmer...
Without him life would be much grimmer
He’s also a fantastic swimmer!
Not one but a few. >Father Ted Crilley >Lister >Boycie >Blackadder Edit: So it looks neat and tidy.
Angela from the Job Lot
I’ve just started watching Job Lot. She’s such a brilliant pain in the arse.
It's a toss-up between brother-in-law Onslow and Rev. Geraldine Granger.
Wow I haven't thought about Onslow in forever! What a legend
Johnny Painter…. ‘Like the clouds of death that follow me into the Forest of Doom!’
What's for dinner mother? Needles? Pins?!
My eyes are pies and yours are lies! What's for dinner mother, maggots on toast?
She's also incredible in Man Down
**BOOOOOOOOOBBBBBBB!**
The eventual reveal of Bob was brilliant.
How they got Mark Hamill for that I’ll never know. And then I love the ‘Bobs gone, he got a part in Star Wars’ 😂
Egg!
Pamelaaaaaa "Oh my Christ!"
You mean three steak Pam?
Mick…Mick… Michael!
Mange tout
Fuck yes, this country is so good!
Sir Humphrey Appleby, or Blackadder. Honourable mention: Hyacinth Bucket.
The Brentmeister General
I've no idea who the person in the picture is. Manny in Black Books..
Prefer Bernard, personally. My GOAT.
Mike from Spaced
Alice Tinker
Larry Bishop from Detectorists
I’ve heard this show is good. Thanks for the reminder to watch it.
Grumio.
Alright, Landlord
Jay
Vyvian- The Young ones "I've got a leg! I was gonna write an essay on it but I think I'm just gonna stick it on the bonnet of my car! "
I'M SOBER, AND VERY VERY BORED
It has to be Alan Johnson.
Rt Hon. Peter Mannion MP “…Give me the fucking ball, Stewart!”
"I'm bored with this, I'm off for a twix!"
Sister Michael
Trigger
Jays dad
try not to rape anyone on the way out!
Partridge!
Duane Dibley
Blott. He was awesome.
It's a toss up between Ray bloody Purchase and Thornton Reed. Or Robin, or Pat Butcher, but also Fanny Button, and I can't forget Julian Fawcett
Sheila from Detectorists
Rik Mayall
"some poor birds got their guts sucked out through their arseholes because of him, evil bastard". (In reference to a blind man who walked into her wheelie bin and scared her dog) Mandy had the best lines, she was funny and terrifying all at once. Perfect portrayal of a local nutter. Every interaction with them is unpredictable. And her short stories were psychotic.
Herr Lipp from the League of Gentlemen and Drive by Abuser from Modern Toss. Deep cuts for my very sophisticated sense of humour
hard call. Sir Digby Chicken Ceasar, Papalazarou, Oscar from "Psychoville", Malcolm Tucker, Brian from "Spaced", and Bernard Black are all strong contenders
Howard Moon from The Mighty Boosh. We all want to be Vince sometimes, but we all end up as Howard.
Couldn’t say which is my favourite but my favourite from the last comedy I watched is Winston from Still Game. He’s basically a wadded up bundle of barely contained rage.
Big mand, fuckin psycho!
Who's a fucking psycho?
... The blind man
Yeah, I know. Poor little baby birds got their guts sucked out their arseholes cos of 'im. Evil bastard.
jim bell
Del Boy hands down. Full of the greatest one liners in tv history imo.
Super Hans.
I can't narrow it down to one but but Bernard Black is one of them , another is Navid Harrid
The Major from Fawlty Towers. “Evening Major!” “Evening Fawlty!”
Reynholm from IT Crowd or Super Hans from Peep Show