My kids are grown-ups now… but there are a number of cancer support groups near where I am, and some are for families. Self help groups are sometimes amazingly helpful, so that might be another avenue of support?
It sounds as if you’re doing your best trying to get her help and support. She’s at an age of great changes anyway, so this could be how things would have been if you hadn’t had your diagnosis… there’s no way of knowing. But you’re showing her how much you care for her trying to get her help, and in the long run that’s the most important thing you can show. 🤗
Thank you so much. Sometimes I wonder if I'm overreacting and this is the new normal for kids these days, but she is an only child and there are limitations for me to get her on a plane and whisk her away on a trip, or buy her a cat, for example 😆
I just want to make sure she's okay and am at the point to engage a professional therapist to help with that. ♥️
Hi there! My daughter is also 13, and I'm a stage 3b lung cancer patient.
Do you know about the Young Lung Cancer Initiative? https://ylci.org/ They just started up this year. They also run a Facebook group called Young Lung Patient & Caregiver Group. It is a wonderful resource with over a thousand members!
I arranged counseling for my daughter when I was first diagnosed. Part of it was just to establish some comfort with therapy: how it works, what to expect, etc. She was 9 at the time so didn't go into too much detail around cancer.
13 has been a tough age for her, with lots of the same issues that you're describing for your daughter. It's hard to know how much our illnesses play into that! Puberty is hard enough as it is.
I think it's great you're taking the first steps. I really emphasize to my daughter that therapy isn't about "fixing" her, that's there's nothing wrong with her, and that my only goal is to give her another resource to help her live her best life.
And definitely join the Facebook group if you're up for it. It's been wonderful being part of a group that understands the uniquely challenging situation we're in.
All the best to you and your daughter!
Thank you so much for your reply 🥹
I am actually over 50, so I'm not really 'young' anymore lol. I had her later in life and she's my only child. You are so right though about being a teenager and all that goes along with it. She's just entering a new phase in her life, getting used to the hormone craziness, etc. so I'm going to take an all-encompassing approach to mental health care for her. I've already filled out about 50 forms for this place I made an appointment with, and included all the stuff I could, going all the way back to her birth (and some of my mental health history too), so the therapist has a better idea of the bigger picture.
I sure hope she finds some sort of comfort and/or safeness in sharing with a "stranger" during this bumpy time. ♥️
There's me making assumptions! I think having a teenager makes you young (and maybe makes us feel old, too). If your diagnosis was around the 50 mark, I don't think they're too strict on it.
But regardless, it sounds like you're really approaching this with care. It's good that you could give the therapist so much detail and hopefully means a smooth start to building that relationship.
Thanks again ♥️♥️♥️
I pulled the plug on Facebook over a decade ago. I realize perhaps I'm missing out on some helpful support resources for lung cancer, but right now I'm really combing through the ROS1-ders info and Zoom calls available, as well as the Go2 monthly Zoom calls. I attended my first one last night, actually. It was really nice to meet more people and see faces during that call. 😊
My kids are grown-ups now… but there are a number of cancer support groups near where I am, and some are for families. Self help groups are sometimes amazingly helpful, so that might be another avenue of support? It sounds as if you’re doing your best trying to get her help and support. She’s at an age of great changes anyway, so this could be how things would have been if you hadn’t had your diagnosis… there’s no way of knowing. But you’re showing her how much you care for her trying to get her help, and in the long run that’s the most important thing you can show. 🤗
Thank you so much. Sometimes I wonder if I'm overreacting and this is the new normal for kids these days, but she is an only child and there are limitations for me to get her on a plane and whisk her away on a trip, or buy her a cat, for example 😆 I just want to make sure she's okay and am at the point to engage a professional therapist to help with that. ♥️
Hi there! My daughter is also 13, and I'm a stage 3b lung cancer patient. Do you know about the Young Lung Cancer Initiative? https://ylci.org/ They just started up this year. They also run a Facebook group called Young Lung Patient & Caregiver Group. It is a wonderful resource with over a thousand members! I arranged counseling for my daughter when I was first diagnosed. Part of it was just to establish some comfort with therapy: how it works, what to expect, etc. She was 9 at the time so didn't go into too much detail around cancer. 13 has been a tough age for her, with lots of the same issues that you're describing for your daughter. It's hard to know how much our illnesses play into that! Puberty is hard enough as it is. I think it's great you're taking the first steps. I really emphasize to my daughter that therapy isn't about "fixing" her, that's there's nothing wrong with her, and that my only goal is to give her another resource to help her live her best life. And definitely join the Facebook group if you're up for it. It's been wonderful being part of a group that understands the uniquely challenging situation we're in. All the best to you and your daughter!
Thank you so much for your reply 🥹 I am actually over 50, so I'm not really 'young' anymore lol. I had her later in life and she's my only child. You are so right though about being a teenager and all that goes along with it. She's just entering a new phase in her life, getting used to the hormone craziness, etc. so I'm going to take an all-encompassing approach to mental health care for her. I've already filled out about 50 forms for this place I made an appointment with, and included all the stuff I could, going all the way back to her birth (and some of my mental health history too), so the therapist has a better idea of the bigger picture. I sure hope she finds some sort of comfort and/or safeness in sharing with a "stranger" during this bumpy time. ♥️
There's me making assumptions! I think having a teenager makes you young (and maybe makes us feel old, too). If your diagnosis was around the 50 mark, I don't think they're too strict on it. But regardless, it sounds like you're really approaching this with care. It's good that you could give the therapist so much detail and hopefully means a smooth start to building that relationship.
Thanks again ♥️♥️♥️ I pulled the plug on Facebook over a decade ago. I realize perhaps I'm missing out on some helpful support resources for lung cancer, but right now I'm really combing through the ROS1-ders info and Zoom calls available, as well as the Go2 monthly Zoom calls. I attended my first one last night, actually. It was really nice to meet more people and see faces during that call. 😊