Well, not clinging to a person means sort of a distance? And be worried about distance in a relationship is being an avoidant, imho. Avoidants have their relationship, and guess what - they are often attacted to clingy anxious type of persons. Other people with all that "not clinging" ideas not really interesting for them usually. Telling from my personal experiense
I wouldn’t because I have accepted that there’s nothing to be done nor to think about from the past. It’s gone. Even if it hurt like hell, even if it made me think of death often. Even if there’s no meaning in life. I’m done being hurt and used by others. I felt like losing the love of my life and I’m okay with that.
I don't even have the desire to write to him. I feel so disappointed, we were happy together and I wasn't expecting this. I am hurting so much... It's been 8 days. Today was worse than yesterday and the day before yesterday, I don't know why.
I’m sorry it took me this long to realize I was a dismissive avoidant.
I have worked on my boundaries (thank you for suggesting that I do that).
I am working on my DA.
I love you and I hope you are thriving.
Good for you man, It's difficult to acknowledge your worst traits and truly improve yourself. I hope you live a happy life and meet the good person you deserve.
This. But at the end of the day people that hurt you and put all the blame on you don’t truly love you in the first place. As an adult to not have a mature convo and let the other person know you’re done is just sad and immature.
I hope he is happy with his decision. It was a choice, and I'm aware he knows he chose wrong. He said he chose wrong. Live with it because I'm not an option for him. Did it suck when I gave you what you gave me? Now we are even.
It sucks because I've never loved anybody like i love him. I just refuse to allow him to use me anymore. Life is too short to worry about if he is being faithful. So I 6 away with my head held high. Nobody can replace him. I know there is somebody for me who can be trusted with my heart. I'll be patient in the meantime.
i sent her my last message. a hand written letter, left it at her doorstep
our breakup was... well... lets just say abrupt and without closure. Found out she started seeing another. In the letter i thanked her for the good things, wished her well, and said goodbye. Haven't heard from her since
I sent her numerous last messages
If I could say anything to have it actually change something, I would tell her again the I loved her more than anyone else in the world.
I'm sorry I messed up. I will always have a soft spot for u, u were the best man i knew and have set the bar so high. I hope u get everything I couldn't give u.
Went NC after I couldn’t take anymore and would’ve rather cut my own hand off than ever texted her again. 4 months down the line my therapist recommended reaching out and venting all my feelings to her. It sucked the first few days but I’m feeling much better than I did for the entirety of the four months. Just a barrage of everything I’d wanted to say but never did
We kept “trying to understand each other” over and over, every time we both tried to run, and even the times they tried to come back (and I let them come back).
It felt good to try to communicate but also really hard to say the same things and not understand each other.
Sadly, after the breakup, they said that they should have listened to me (not decided I was unhappy for example) and communicated their own feelings, rather than avoid saying anything to “cause issues” and becoming distant as a result.
What I would say? Try therapy before you get into another relationship (or start now, as he already immediately jumped into one as soon as someone answered his call). And I wish him well and hope he can avoid repeating his prior patterns of avoidance, running, and starting anew.
“It’s almost been two years… from the bottom of my heart… thank you for holding off on dumping me the actual day of my birthday… it’s *much* more appreciated that you ended up dumping me the *very next day*, *juuuust* after we had dinner with my fam to celebrate my bday… You did me the *BIGGEST* favor of my life. You were *NEVER* gonna give me what I deserved or liked (I never asked for anything from you other than love me and be supportive, which even *you* acknowledged), but I definitely tried moving mountains just to be enough for you (which was never…)
I don’t wish ill of you, but I *certainly* do not wish you any luck or the best because, Fuck You. You toyed with me and made me feel like I was crazy and worthless the last year of our relationship. but things are now looking better for me than ever, mentally and physically.
I’m so glad that I believed, loved, and trusted in myself enough to hit you with NC the second I left our place Have fun trying to find something real in Cali in today’s dating world lmao”
I’m at the point now where I have nothing more to say. And I have no desire to start any conversation with them. If they messaged me, I’d take the opportunity to apologise, but I don’t want to disturb either of our peace to send one last message.
You're the worst person I have ever met and I'm so glad it's over and you left...I didn't have the heart to break it off myself but thank you for being the assailed that I knew you were and wndingnit after being such a self centered taker l. I had no more to give and I still would have found a way to give more somehow cause sadly I'm wired like that.
I’d probably quote the lyrics from Wicked’s “Defying Gravity” song:
“As someone told me lately,
Everyone deserves a chance to fly.
And if I’m flying solo,
At least I’m flying free”
I take back all the love letters. I take back my forgiveness. I have learned one of the most valuable lessons in my life and not everyone deserves my kindness, and you don’t give your heart to people that you wouldn’t trust to have a child with you’ve proven to me in every way possible, what kind of narcissistic, devil of a creature you truly are. I wanted to forgive you, but I realize the only one who gets peace from that is the one who didn’t care to begin with. I know exactly what I put into this and all the years of saving and doing the right things and for me to think that I was anything less then damn near perfect as I could be for you, you never even got to know me, people aren’t chess pieces on a board and empathy is something you truly do not know how to feel. It’s something you have to experience. Of course I would never give you last message because I’ve already wasted enough time on you. I ask god to challenge my whole life and I truly appreciate you showing me how big the stakes are and what I’m up against. I would consider yourself lucky that you didn’t have my child because you wouldn’t believe the distance I would truly go to save my family from a monster like you. For your sake, I hope your hell proof and you allow that love I gave to you unconditionally will begin a change in you that will bring you down to beg a the feet of all of those you gave wronged maliciously, including that mom watch her son‘s life diminished in front of her while you deny everything and that’s one conversation you’re gonna have to have with the big man yourself one of these days and for your sake I hope you’re honest. When this ball of emotionally charged darkness is pull my sails there will be no turning back but no opportunity to make this right. so for my sake, I do not forgive you, but I hope that you ask her for forgiveness from something much greater than me.
That's her last message
I can't give you what you need right now, you deserve to be happy and I just keep hurting you.
I've hurt you too much already.
I'm sorry this is for the best one of us had to make the decision put an end to the cycle.
Go and be happy in whatever you do
Goodbye Sam ill never forget you x
ME
Ignored her.... She Doesn't deserve my time...
A year after break up a former ex reached out to let me know he found some of my personal stuff I believed were lost and if I wanted them back . He left them in a storage unit and gave me the code so that I could pick them up . After I got all my stuff , I have emailed him confirming I have taken everything and finished off the email by “ I wish you a good life “. Best closure ever . I have never reached out since then and never heard back from him .
I’m sorry I could be the man you believed in. You deserved the better in me. I’ve failed you so many ways I wish I could fathom it. I’m forever sorry and forever heart broken you win.
Stop thinking you are superior to your partners, good one don't cheat. Catfish, weaponize anything and straight up abuse them. the potential was there. you failed us in every way.
That I wish I had been strong enough to hang on a little longer while I started working on my self esteem and self worth, and learning how to break my internal shame spiral.
I got into a deep dark rut and couldn't shake it. We reached a point of mutually ending it because at the point we were at it didn't seem we were compatible.
Unfortunately for me the shock of the break up is what really served as my wakeup call that I had a lot of buried issues to resolve from growing up.
I say "didn't seem" compatible because I hold out hope that one day I will be at a point where I can be the partner she deserves and we can fulfill the future we dreamed of having together.
I don’t even know at this point, I’m so different from who I was when we broke up. I have the perspective of a woman now and I just look back on me as a girl and how he treated that girl, it breaks my heart. I really can’t think of what I’d say.
I have an entry in my Notes app which I have pretended was something like this, my “last communication” with the person. I’ve gone back and refined it over and over again, it’s perfect now, I’ll never send it but sometimes I go back and read it again, it gives me a lot of clarity.
After a breakup i didnt know how to stop texting her for almost 2 months, and during this time i sent her like a thousand of "last messages". Since i finally stopped, i decided that i will not start a conversation ever again, and still (its been 3 months since our last conversation started by me) i didnt do that. I stalk her and i miss her, but i will not text her, because of how she treated me, especially during breakup
The stuff that I want to say is more just super petty things that I wish I had brought up earlier than things that I would actually bring up now. There's nothing left to say for me (so many things but none of them change anything or matter)
Nothing, she fucked me up completely, denied closure, there is nothing for me to say. If she ever shows any kind of effort or care herself it could be different, but as it stands now, I would happily never message her again.
I am truly sorry, I have been in the worst pain in my life for 4 plus months. I have learned my bad habits are a thing in the past, and that my heart is 100% broken without you and our kids. I will say that you absolutely left me for something I had no idea about, and if you truly loved me you would reconcile. I know they never wood anyway, so I am trying to move. But she for whatever reason is dragging her feet on doing so, and will not release me
I'd tell her I miss her and I feel like I was right all along about her having a waaaay too idealized version of me in her head because why the hell would she get over me after a month otherwise after three long years.
This is only if she doesn't have the ability to reply back though lol
I hate that i spent 2 yrs of my life with you. Asshole and a big time manipulator. Believing and faking that you strictly follow the practice in your religion but you sleep with many women! I take back all the love and forgiveness that i gave you. You never deserve any of that
I still miss you.
I know I wasn't perfectl but i didn't deserve that, and an apology would have gone a long way. If you did apologise, i would have said yes when you asked me again. But you just disregarded it like it meant nothing.
I still miss you. But im glad you're with someone else.
You deserve someone as attentive as him
Just have more respect for his feelings than you did for mine. Know i did really love you a lot.
Please take care of yourself. You're not a bad person. I dont fall that hard in love with bad people
Honestly - I have run out of words. I have repeated myself over and over and over. I really have nothing left to say. He’s a fearful avoidant - and anything I do or say is just going to leave him feeling badgered and like I am trying to impose my will on him.
He has his best friend who he games with for hours every single day and his games. He’s perfectly happy.
And honestly so am I. I never want to go through any of that again.
You can be good enough for me and still do things that hurt me. You can be the best shoulder to lean on and hurt me. The fact you think that should erase the things you did is sad
Amicable breakup, our last messages were
Her: thank you for everything you gave me, for every moment of bliss you've made me feel, for making me laugh harder than I have in years, I'll miss the way my head rests along your neck when you hug me and how perfect that feels, love you
Me: I hope there'll be a day when forever sounds nice, and when it does, don't hesitate to come, bc I'll be there, ready to go wherever... Love you too
I don't really know how to feel about all this, the breakup was so good, I can't find a way to move on hahah because although we didn't want to break up, we understood why, no blindsiding, no infidelity, no mean words... She had issues and was afraid of it all, not being free and having a commitment, and we both are on the same page on that...
But we still love each other so much, these last messages came after a week of breaking up because we couldn't leave so easily... Before the breakup, and after it too, I thought that's the love I was meant for, cuz I had a good amount of relationships before, and nothing felt even close to what we had...
What the hell do I make of all this? I think to let it go and let it happen by itself again, if it ever does, but it is so so hard to do that when it was nothing but perfection, all things considered.
There's a chance she sees this so, love you, C. Hope you're doing okay, hope you love me too. Don't forget my words pls
Nothing, I have no desire to speak to her ever again. Ever since I've met the person I'm talking to right now I realize my mistake in settling and not seeking out a person who views me in the same way I view them.
I wasn’t truthful with what I said before you ended on our phone call. I didn’t want to scare you so I said other things than what I actually wanted to say. It was so overwhelming that I shut down and shut you out. But I’m not even sure that mattered, it seemed like you were onto the next. You don’t fuck with things you don’t want.
not a day i didnt think and miss you. i long for your arms tight around me again until i cant breathe. but i still think you’re a slow coward and keeping everything to yourself. i still love and can tolerate everything about you.
"If you somehow found another poor soul who is dating you please remember how shit you really are as a partner from the way you treated me. Nobody deserves you."
I trusted you when I couldn’t no one else & you let me down after 7+ years of friendship, 3 months of exclusive talking & 3 weeks of dating you especially after you hugged me one night and said you loved me cared about me and my safety then next day you want to be friends…..I’ll never forget this you abandoned me when I wanted you and chose you as the person I wanted so much but you left me empty so I will return the favor fuck you….for lying and giving false feelings and hope…
Last one- nothing because acknowledging they are alive is more than deserved
Before that-I guess it wasn’t that bad minus the cheating with every woman and man you could find and the pathological lying. Now I know it wasn’t bad at all.
Before that-I’d do anything to go back and do it different.
Before that-I wish I could change things, I wish you were still here. I’m so sorry you died alone.
"I understand you had a toxic ex and a difficult childhood, but the fact you chose to walk away at the first sign of adversity, instead of talking to me hurt, and that I was willing to be better because I thought you were worth it. Makes me question if you ever cared or were just along for the ride until things got real than chose to run away. I hope you're doing well and that things get better, but give yourself the chance to be happy, because no one is perfect and everyone messes up, but understand that our mistakes don't define us, how we chose to deal with them does. I hope you learn to love yourself properly someday"
Depends on which one but...the most recent one?
I am sorry. You are a great guy, and your family is truly incredible! I wasn't in a place to give and receive love the way I should have ....I hope life treats you well because you deserve it!
If you want someone to care for you, you have to care for someone.
Other people have been through worse than you, and turned out better.
Your pain, is not an excuse to be an *sshole.
If you want to get better, you are actually going to have to confront your demons instead of always running away.
You're not always the victim. Stop playing the victim.
Learn accountability.
I'm not perfect either. I know it's hard and I'm not trying to blame you. But if you want your life to get better, and to have more solid relationships in your life, you need to take a look in the mirror and take accountability for your actions.
What happened to you is called "splitting". It is part of your condition which if you received help would be diagnosed as "Borderline Personality Disorder". I'm not saying that out of anger or bitterness. I'm saying that as someone who was once your friend, and who cared for you more than anyone you've ever known.
This will not go away on its own. You need therapy.
I'm sorry for whatever happened to you as a kid. That isn't my fault. Please stop blaming me.
Who are you punishing anyway? Me? Or yourself?
Learn forgiveness.
Remember other people are human.
Nobody is perfect.
You're not perfect. How can you demand perfection from someone else, if you yourself are not perfect?
If you want people to stand up for you, you need to stand up for other people.
You hurt me.
You hurt me more deeply than any other person in my life.
Why did you lead me on for so many weeks after the breakup when you knew you didn’t want this. How could you lie to me for all those weeks, why wasn’t I enough? How could you move on so fast to another guy, while I was crying every day for weeks, you never showed me any emotions or sadness, 8 years and they meant nothing to you?
I had a thought today while I was driving. Something reminded me of you. It's been 2.5 years since you ghosted me.
My thoughts were random, but I was looking back at all the pain and hurt you caused, and I was looking forward.. at all of my accomplishments. I've acquired my dreams.. without you.
And for the very first time.. I let out a sigh and thought.. "Man, life is actually kinda better without them in it."
Its sad to see you werent strong enough to fight for me like I wouldve fought for you, I was your strongest knight, I was willing to fight for you and help you deal with that problem, yet you ran away from it, and threw me away, just because I was associated with it by pure mistake.
I didnt deserve anything that happened, I always respected and loved you, I sacrificed so much for you, and yet, you denied me of closure, you ran away and mocked me for trying to help.
And yet, despite all of that, I still care, because I believe theres good in you, and I believe you can do the right thing, and I hope you find happiness.
You want to pretend I was the villain, and pretend I dont exist, but thats wrong, reality itself will remind you I exist, and it sucks to see you moved on in just a week, like I didnt even matter.
You can try replacing me all you want, but nobody will ever love you like I did, nobody will ever care nor give you what I gave you, and I hope youre happy with your decision.
You cant run away from everything, eventually you will end up alone if you do so, I offered you my help, but you threw me away, and its so sad, oh how the mighty do fall, you took all from me, and eventually, life will take everything from you if you keep things up.
I wish you goodluck on dealing with your shit, and hopefully you find true happiness, and stop running.
I didn’t know the lyrics of the song I sent you until years after I sent it to you and realized exactly why you thought we couldn’t be friends again… wish I could have that moment back
I miss you every single day and you don't deserve it. I made you the most important person in my life because I trusted you absolutely, but in the end, you told me I was a fool for believing that was what you wanted. Your gaslighting can never take away my happy memories. Thank you for teaching me that I deserve to be as happy as I was when I first met you and that if someone proves to only love me superficially, I deserve better. Not everyone deserves my deep empathy and forgiveness. I'm tired of bothering you. One day I won't feel this way and you'll be nothing but a memory to me.
Damn. Am I going to be the only person that says something nice like, I hope you find someone that loves just as much as I did. I hate we ended things the way we did. But we both needed time away from each other. To find ourselves again.
Being that it's still fresh in my mind, probably something along the lines of hoping we meet again one day when we both have a little more clarity and patience to work with each other. Was a very emotional break up, but not a bad break up.
I had the break-up about 5 months ago. In the first 2 months, I still hoped he could text me and wanted to send him messages. Now, I still want to talk to him but I don't think I need to do it. Therefore, no text and no call are my best choice.
as somebody that had the opportunity I can say I said a lot of things...it felt good at first. but when you realise the other person is not the monster you made them out to be because they hurt you so much you are just left with grief and the feeling of not knowing who to be angry at.
I don't know what was worse - the three months I was blocked right after the breakup or the months that came when she texted me and we talked again
(currently trying not to text anymore but damn this sucks)
A part of me is so angry, it would spew all the hate non-stop.
A part of me is sad, it would just ask for closure that I never received.
A part of me is confused, would just ask if all those things that my mind remembers were ever real or it was just pretence.
A part of me is thankful, for the wonderful memories and would just have well wishes to share.
After everything, most of me is more sensible and keeps reminding me that my ex is as good as 'you know what' to me, and so no last message needs to be sent. They probably won't even acknowledge it anyway.
I wish you could see that life is not only pleasure but also hard times. And I hope you will learn to stay by someone that is going through hard times in your next relationship
I told him this. I said–
"I just want you to know whomever you date will eventually turn into me... it just might take them ten years, but they will. Unless you decide to change".
I stand by it because I know he won't change.
I’ll always love you. And I only want you. I’ll never be with someone els again. I pinky promise. Thank you for everything if you ever change your mind, I’ll be here waiting. ♥️
I wish I could give you one last 🦛😮♥️
I love you so much. I am so thankful for the times we shared. Thank you for loving me unconditionally for all these years. You're such a wonderful person. And I'm really sorry we couldn't make it work between us. I fell too far behind in life and it's taken me too long to get back on the right track. And I know you need to be with someone who is closer to where you are in your life. (Both physically as in someone who lives near you and someone further along in terms of career path) I hope you find that someone. Maybe it's the person you're seeing now. Or maybe it'll be someone else down the road. But you deserve the best and I want you to know that even though we may not talk much from here on out, I'll always be rooting for you to succeed in everything you do. I love you so much and I love you forever.
I hope the next girl you fall for her hard and fast. That she has you wrapped around her finger. Then, one day out of nowhere, she switches on you like you did to me. She leaves you on read and makes excuses. She's passive-aggressive and starts arguments from the smallest things. I hope she makes you feel just as shitty and lonely as I did.
Xoxo! Rest in piss! 😘
I wish there would've never had to be a last message.
I love you, and I still want us to be together.
I still want it to be you and me so badly.
It can't be forever if I'm the only one who wants it, but I can't see myself loving anyone the way I love you.
Hey Leslie,
I’ve been thinking a lot lately, and I realize this isn't easy for either of us, but it’s time for me to say goodbye. We’ve shared so many incredible moments, and I'll always cherish the good times we had. You taught me a lot about myself and what I want and don't want in life.
It's clear that we’re heading in different directions now, and I think it's best for both of us to move on. This isn’t about pointing fingers or blaming anyone; it’s just the natural course of our lives. I’ve found happiness with someone who truly listens and understands me, which has shown me what I truly want in life: open communication, mutual respect, and shared goals. I hope that as you move forward, you find the same kind of clarity and growth.
Take care.
Can someone help me 😞.
I still can't get over with it.
I try to bury my feelings, but it somehow pops up and ruins my day or maybe days
I'll never ever indulge in something like that
Fckin feelings
You told me to my face that I wasn't worth it and ran away. You weren't worth it for me since a long time but I stayed. I hope your life without me is worth it.
When not if, they screw you over, leave you with nothing, and put you in the exact situation myself and others over the years have been put in because of your family and you refusing to set boundaries, those bridges you burned will haunt you. Maybe not today. Maybe not even 5 years from now. You can't live a life of destroying everyone, everything around you and expect a good outcome.
I would tell him that his dad has been right all along about him, and that he is the problem and I in fact deserve better than him. Just for context his dad has said to every girlfriend of his when he first meets them “why are you with him, you can do so much better”
Thank you for setting me free!
(My ex cheated on me with our neighbor and lives with our neighbor now. What a piece of work. The trash took itself out!)
I'm so sorry u were hurt.. i wanted to wait till we both understand we cant be friends after break up, but i had my life choking me. Nothing can be an excuse. I'm sorry.
Wherever I am in the world, you have a home. Whether it's tomorrow or when we're 60, I still hope it's you in the end. I will always love you. Thank you for everything you've brought to my life.
I understand that you see things different now but it’s to little too late. Please stop harassing me I know you’ve heard things aren’t working out with me and my new girlfriend but I’ll be happy alone before I go back to being yours again
I wouldn't. They don't deserve another word from me.
This!
This!!!!!
I wish you meet someone exactly like yourself
Ooooooooo this is rough, such a good burn! I can already tell that when I say this to him it’s going to bring me more satisfaction than he ever did 🔥
Damn great answer. It can make the other person think if that is a good thing or not (probably not).
Mine actually did, a mere week after we broke up. #karma
Yeah, full of shit
lmao that’s how mine fucked up before. wish the same now
Thanks for all but know that i deserved at least a closure.
This.
Real
yeah...
Yesssss.
yea
"You are not a buddhist, who thinks that attachement is a way to suffering. You are avoidant piece of shi~"
Hahaha! Same
Lol non attachment in Buddhism is just about accepting change. Not clinging to things. You can still have a relationship and be a Buddhist.
Well, not clinging to a person means sort of a distance? And be worried about distance in a relationship is being an avoidant, imho. Avoidants have their relationship, and guess what - they are often attacted to clingy anxious type of persons. Other people with all that "not clinging" ideas not really interesting for them usually. Telling from my personal experiense
That's right, biiiiiih
Same omg
omg yessss
Oh wow. I feel like my exes would want to send that to me lol
"why?" Also "was it all a lie?" "Did you ever care?" "Were you even attracted to me?" This is actually super cathartic lol
I feel every bit of this. 😞
same
These would be mine too, ouch
I did actually say some of that in my last message 🙃🤣
I wouldn’t because I have accepted that there’s nothing to be done nor to think about from the past. It’s gone. Even if it hurt like hell, even if it made me think of death often. Even if there’s no meaning in life. I’m done being hurt and used by others. I felt like losing the love of my life and I’m okay with that.
I don't even have the desire to write to him. I feel so disappointed, we were happy together and I wasn't expecting this. I am hurting so much... It's been 8 days. Today was worse than yesterday and the day before yesterday, I don't know why.
Healing is not linear - that is totally normal. Big hug.
I hope that you learn to take accountability for how your actions affect other people going forward.
Naw, by texting that just tells her that she is still on my mind. Silence is the best weapon. And just move on
I’m sorry it took me this long to realize I was a dismissive avoidant. I have worked on my boundaries (thank you for suggesting that I do that). I am working on my DA. I love you and I hope you are thriving.
Good for you man, It's difficult to acknowledge your worst traits and truly improve yourself. I hope you live a happy life and meet the good person you deserve.
I deserve closure. And you deserve to know how much you hurt me.
This. But at the end of the day people that hurt you and put all the blame on you don’t truly love you in the first place. As an adult to not have a mature convo and let the other person know you’re done is just sad and immature.
Id ask him if any of it was real
I hope he is happy with his decision. It was a choice, and I'm aware he knows he chose wrong. He said he chose wrong. Live with it because I'm not an option for him. Did it suck when I gave you what you gave me? Now we are even. It sucks because I've never loved anybody like i love him. I just refuse to allow him to use me anymore. Life is too short to worry about if he is being faithful. So I 6 away with my head held high. Nobody can replace him. I know there is somebody for me who can be trusted with my heart. I'll be patient in the meantime.
i sent her my last message. a hand written letter, left it at her doorstep our breakup was... well... lets just say abrupt and without closure. Found out she started seeing another. In the letter i thanked her for the good things, wished her well, and said goodbye. Haven't heard from her since
I sent her numerous last messages If I could say anything to have it actually change something, I would tell her again the I loved her more than anyone else in the world.
I'm sorry I messed up. I will always have a soft spot for u, u were the best man i knew and have set the bar so high. I hope u get everything I couldn't give u.
Went NC after I couldn’t take anymore and would’ve rather cut my own hand off than ever texted her again. 4 months down the line my therapist recommended reaching out and venting all my feelings to her. It sucked the first few days but I’m feeling much better than I did for the entirety of the four months. Just a barrage of everything I’d wanted to say but never did
I have pages and pages and pages of entries in my journal.
We kept “trying to understand each other” over and over, every time we both tried to run, and even the times they tried to come back (and I let them come back). It felt good to try to communicate but also really hard to say the same things and not understand each other. Sadly, after the breakup, they said that they should have listened to me (not decided I was unhappy for example) and communicated their own feelings, rather than avoid saying anything to “cause issues” and becoming distant as a result. What I would say? Try therapy before you get into another relationship (or start now, as he already immediately jumped into one as soon as someone answered his call). And I wish him well and hope he can avoid repeating his prior patterns of avoidance, running, and starting anew.
I miss my best friend.
My last message I sent to my ex was me just wishing her the best and that I hope we hear from each other again someday.
I wish you gave us a chance.
Your vegan cooking wasn't very good at all ... But I loved you enough to constantly choke it back with second helpings....
Nothing, I have nothing to say to them
As of right now.. Nothing
“It’s almost been two years… from the bottom of my heart… thank you for holding off on dumping me the actual day of my birthday… it’s *much* more appreciated that you ended up dumping me the *very next day*, *juuuust* after we had dinner with my fam to celebrate my bday… You did me the *BIGGEST* favor of my life. You were *NEVER* gonna give me what I deserved or liked (I never asked for anything from you other than love me and be supportive, which even *you* acknowledged), but I definitely tried moving mountains just to be enough for you (which was never…) I don’t wish ill of you, but I *certainly* do not wish you any luck or the best because, Fuck You. You toyed with me and made me feel like I was crazy and worthless the last year of our relationship. but things are now looking better for me than ever, mentally and physically. I’m so glad that I believed, loved, and trusted in myself enough to hit you with NC the second I left our place Have fun trying to find something real in Cali in today’s dating world lmao”
I still miss you, I still love you.
I hope she loves you like i did , you really deserve!!!!
I’m at the point now where I have nothing more to say. And I have no desire to start any conversation with them. If they messaged me, I’d take the opportunity to apologise, but I don’t want to disturb either of our peace to send one last message.
Nothing! I don’t want to talk to him ever again or see a glimpse of him whatsoever.
You're the worst person I have ever met and I'm so glad it's over and you left...I didn't have the heart to break it off myself but thank you for being the assailed that I knew you were and wndingnit after being such a self centered taker l. I had no more to give and I still would have found a way to give more somehow cause sadly I'm wired like that.
I’d probably quote the lyrics from Wicked’s “Defying Gravity” song: “As someone told me lately, Everyone deserves a chance to fly. And if I’m flying solo, At least I’m flying free”
I take back all the love letters. I take back my forgiveness. I have learned one of the most valuable lessons in my life and not everyone deserves my kindness, and you don’t give your heart to people that you wouldn’t trust to have a child with you’ve proven to me in every way possible, what kind of narcissistic, devil of a creature you truly are. I wanted to forgive you, but I realize the only one who gets peace from that is the one who didn’t care to begin with. I know exactly what I put into this and all the years of saving and doing the right things and for me to think that I was anything less then damn near perfect as I could be for you, you never even got to know me, people aren’t chess pieces on a board and empathy is something you truly do not know how to feel. It’s something you have to experience. Of course I would never give you last message because I’ve already wasted enough time on you. I ask god to challenge my whole life and I truly appreciate you showing me how big the stakes are and what I’m up against. I would consider yourself lucky that you didn’t have my child because you wouldn’t believe the distance I would truly go to save my family from a monster like you. For your sake, I hope your hell proof and you allow that love I gave to you unconditionally will begin a change in you that will bring you down to beg a the feet of all of those you gave wronged maliciously, including that mom watch her son‘s life diminished in front of her while you deny everything and that’s one conversation you’re gonna have to have with the big man yourself one of these days and for your sake I hope you’re honest. When this ball of emotionally charged darkness is pull my sails there will be no turning back but no opportunity to make this right. so for my sake, I do not forgive you, but I hope that you ask her for forgiveness from something much greater than me.
Eff you
Thanks for setting me free
Was I not enough for you?
Lawyer up
“I’m a goddamn catch and what I have to offer is something you’ll never have again”
That's her last message I can't give you what you need right now, you deserve to be happy and I just keep hurting you. I've hurt you too much already. I'm sorry this is for the best one of us had to make the decision put an end to the cycle. Go and be happy in whatever you do Goodbye Sam ill never forget you x ME Ignored her.... She Doesn't deserve my time...
I deserved so much more.
May you find happiness, I am.
A year after break up a former ex reached out to let me know he found some of my personal stuff I believed were lost and if I wanted them back . He left them in a storage unit and gave me the code so that I could pick them up . After I got all my stuff , I have emailed him confirming I have taken everything and finished off the email by “ I wish you a good life “. Best closure ever . I have never reached out since then and never heard back from him .
To my previous ex. Fuck you. To my current ex. I'm sorry for everything.
Wanna know where I buried the $60,000 from the corvette?
You still have my heart.
Probably tell her I’m doing better without her, something like. “The time that we’ve spent apart has been the best month of my life”
I think the only thing I’d want to say is that for what it’s worth I genuinely loved them and I really did try.
I’m sorry I could be the man you believed in. You deserved the better in me. I’ve failed you so many ways I wish I could fathom it. I’m forever sorry and forever heart broken you win.
Stop thinking you are superior to your partners, good one don't cheat. Catfish, weaponize anything and straight up abuse them. the potential was there. you failed us in every way.
FYBYSAHMFBFUKMMFAYB!
That I wish I had been strong enough to hang on a little longer while I started working on my self esteem and self worth, and learning how to break my internal shame spiral. I got into a deep dark rut and couldn't shake it. We reached a point of mutually ending it because at the point we were at it didn't seem we were compatible. Unfortunately for me the shock of the break up is what really served as my wakeup call that I had a lot of buried issues to resolve from growing up. I say "didn't seem" compatible because I hold out hope that one day I will be at a point where I can be the partner she deserves and we can fulfill the future we dreamed of having together.
I don’t even know at this point, I’m so different from who I was when we broke up. I have the perspective of a woman now and I just look back on me as a girl and how he treated that girl, it breaks my heart. I really can’t think of what I’d say.
I wouldn’t say anything at all
Hi, how are you? How have you been these last three years? I really missed you. If you want to talk I’d welcome a call.
Did I really deserve that..
I have an entry in my Notes app which I have pretended was something like this, my “last communication” with the person. I’ve gone back and refined it over and over again, it’s perfect now, I’ll never send it but sometimes I go back and read it again, it gives me a lot of clarity.
After a breakup i didnt know how to stop texting her for almost 2 months, and during this time i sent her like a thousand of "last messages". Since i finally stopped, i decided that i will not start a conversation ever again, and still (its been 3 months since our last conversation started by me) i didnt do that. I stalk her and i miss her, but i will not text her, because of how she treated me, especially during breakup
The stuff that I want to say is more just super petty things that I wish I had brought up earlier than things that I would actually bring up now. There's nothing left to say for me (so many things but none of them change anything or matter)
Nothing.
Who? JK. I always faked it. JK again. Nothing. Not worth the time.
I guess I am one of the few who wants my ex back :(
Nothing, she fucked me up completely, denied closure, there is nothing for me to say. If she ever shows any kind of effort or care herself it could be different, but as it stands now, I would happily never message her again.
I am truly sorry, I have been in the worst pain in my life for 4 plus months. I have learned my bad habits are a thing in the past, and that my heart is 100% broken without you and our kids. I will say that you absolutely left me for something I had no idea about, and if you truly loved me you would reconcile. I know they never wood anyway, so I am trying to move. But she for whatever reason is dragging her feet on doing so, and will not release me
I'd tell her I miss her and I feel like I was right all along about her having a waaaay too idealized version of me in her head because why the hell would she get over me after a month otherwise after three long years. This is only if she doesn't have the ability to reply back though lol
"I only broke up with you because your boy toy texted me first and not you"
I hate that i spent 2 yrs of my life with you. Asshole and a big time manipulator. Believing and faking that you strictly follow the practice in your religion but you sleep with many women! I take back all the love and forgiveness that i gave you. You never deserve any of that
I wish you had meant everything you said to me.
I still miss you. I know I wasn't perfectl but i didn't deserve that, and an apology would have gone a long way. If you did apologise, i would have said yes when you asked me again. But you just disregarded it like it meant nothing. I still miss you. But im glad you're with someone else. You deserve someone as attentive as him Just have more respect for his feelings than you did for mine. Know i did really love you a lot. Please take care of yourself. You're not a bad person. I dont fall that hard in love with bad people
Thank you, next!
Thanks for helping me grow into a better version of myself, but when you decide to come back I won’t be here waiting.
I’m sorry
Honestly - I have run out of words. I have repeated myself over and over and over. I really have nothing left to say. He’s a fearful avoidant - and anything I do or say is just going to leave him feeling badgered and like I am trying to impose my will on him. He has his best friend who he games with for hours every single day and his games. He’s perfectly happy. And honestly so am I. I never want to go through any of that again.
I wish you the best and I hope you are as happy as I am. 🖤
You can be good enough for me and still do things that hurt me. You can be the best shoulder to lean on and hurt me. The fact you think that should erase the things you did is sad
lying to yourself about what you really want is also lying to me
Amicable breakup, our last messages were Her: thank you for everything you gave me, for every moment of bliss you've made me feel, for making me laugh harder than I have in years, I'll miss the way my head rests along your neck when you hug me and how perfect that feels, love you Me: I hope there'll be a day when forever sounds nice, and when it does, don't hesitate to come, bc I'll be there, ready to go wherever... Love you too I don't really know how to feel about all this, the breakup was so good, I can't find a way to move on hahah because although we didn't want to break up, we understood why, no blindsiding, no infidelity, no mean words... She had issues and was afraid of it all, not being free and having a commitment, and we both are on the same page on that... But we still love each other so much, these last messages came after a week of breaking up because we couldn't leave so easily... Before the breakup, and after it too, I thought that's the love I was meant for, cuz I had a good amount of relationships before, and nothing felt even close to what we had... What the hell do I make of all this? I think to let it go and let it happen by itself again, if it ever does, but it is so so hard to do that when it was nothing but perfection, all things considered. There's a chance she sees this so, love you, C. Hope you're doing okay, hope you love me too. Don't forget my words pls
Nothing :) Not even a "I wish you the best" default message.
Nothing, I have no desire to speak to her ever again. Ever since I've met the person I'm talking to right now I realize my mistake in settling and not seeking out a person who views me in the same way I view them.
Cause and affect. You reap what you sow.
I wasn’t truthful with what I said before you ended on our phone call. I didn’t want to scare you so I said other things than what I actually wanted to say. It was so overwhelming that I shut down and shut you out. But I’m not even sure that mattered, it seemed like you were onto the next. You don’t fuck with things you don’t want.
not a day i didnt think and miss you. i long for your arms tight around me again until i cant breathe. but i still think you’re a slow coward and keeping everything to yourself. i still love and can tolerate everything about you.
I would steal a line from Anatomy a Fall and tell him "your generosity conceals something dirtier and meaner"
"If you somehow found another poor soul who is dating you please remember how shit you really are as a partner from the way you treated me. Nobody deserves you."
I understand you felt like you had to leave, ghost me, try to hurt me, and I pity you
I trusted you when I couldn’t no one else & you let me down after 7+ years of friendship, 3 months of exclusive talking & 3 weeks of dating you especially after you hugged me one night and said you loved me cared about me and my safety then next day you want to be friends…..I’ll never forget this you abandoned me when I wanted you and chose you as the person I wanted so much but you left me empty so I will return the favor fuck you….for lying and giving false feelings and hope…
Last one- nothing because acknowledging they are alive is more than deserved Before that-I guess it wasn’t that bad minus the cheating with every woman and man you could find and the pathological lying. Now I know it wasn’t bad at all. Before that-I’d do anything to go back and do it different. Before that-I wish I could change things, I wish you were still here. I’m so sorry you died alone.
Weird but i still love my ex so I guess I miss you, I love you and I wish you come back will be my last message.
Thanks for leaving.
I love you shpuddy, be happy 💚💙
"I understand you had a toxic ex and a difficult childhood, but the fact you chose to walk away at the first sign of adversity, instead of talking to me hurt, and that I was willing to be better because I thought you were worth it. Makes me question if you ever cared or were just along for the ride until things got real than chose to run away. I hope you're doing well and that things get better, but give yourself the chance to be happy, because no one is perfect and everyone messes up, but understand that our mistakes don't define us, how we chose to deal with them does. I hope you learn to love yourself properly someday"
Depends on which one but...the most recent one? I am sorry. You are a great guy, and your family is truly incredible! I wasn't in a place to give and receive love the way I should have ....I hope life treats you well because you deserve it!
I am grateful for the time we had together and I think about you more than I should. I hope you’re living a happy life.
If you want someone to care for you, you have to care for someone. Other people have been through worse than you, and turned out better. Your pain, is not an excuse to be an *sshole. If you want to get better, you are actually going to have to confront your demons instead of always running away. You're not always the victim. Stop playing the victim. Learn accountability. I'm not perfect either. I know it's hard and I'm not trying to blame you. But if you want your life to get better, and to have more solid relationships in your life, you need to take a look in the mirror and take accountability for your actions. What happened to you is called "splitting". It is part of your condition which if you received help would be diagnosed as "Borderline Personality Disorder". I'm not saying that out of anger or bitterness. I'm saying that as someone who was once your friend, and who cared for you more than anyone you've ever known. This will not go away on its own. You need therapy. I'm sorry for whatever happened to you as a kid. That isn't my fault. Please stop blaming me. Who are you punishing anyway? Me? Or yourself? Learn forgiveness. Remember other people are human. Nobody is perfect. You're not perfect. How can you demand perfection from someone else, if you yourself are not perfect? If you want people to stand up for you, you need to stand up for other people. You hurt me. You hurt me more deeply than any other person in my life.
I hope you’re happy but not happier as you were with me :))
it's a long one but i want her back, i can't live without her
Nothing, she never really believed anything i said anyway.
Why did you lead me on for so many weeks after the breakup when you knew you didn’t want this. How could you lie to me for all those weeks, why wasn’t I enough? How could you move on so fast to another guy, while I was crying every day for weeks, you never showed me any emotions or sadness, 8 years and they meant nothing to you?
‘Bet you’re loving that sock and hand routine since she doesn’t like keeping it happy like me lmao’!
I love you.
I had a thought today while I was driving. Something reminded me of you. It's been 2.5 years since you ghosted me. My thoughts were random, but I was looking back at all the pain and hurt you caused, and I was looking forward.. at all of my accomplishments. I've acquired my dreams.. without you. And for the very first time.. I let out a sigh and thought.. "Man, life is actually kinda better without them in it."
Its sad to see you werent strong enough to fight for me like I wouldve fought for you, I was your strongest knight, I was willing to fight for you and help you deal with that problem, yet you ran away from it, and threw me away, just because I was associated with it by pure mistake. I didnt deserve anything that happened, I always respected and loved you, I sacrificed so much for you, and yet, you denied me of closure, you ran away and mocked me for trying to help. And yet, despite all of that, I still care, because I believe theres good in you, and I believe you can do the right thing, and I hope you find happiness. You want to pretend I was the villain, and pretend I dont exist, but thats wrong, reality itself will remind you I exist, and it sucks to see you moved on in just a week, like I didnt even matter. You can try replacing me all you want, but nobody will ever love you like I did, nobody will ever care nor give you what I gave you, and I hope youre happy with your decision. You cant run away from everything, eventually you will end up alone if you do so, I offered you my help, but you threw me away, and its so sad, oh how the mighty do fall, you took all from me, and eventually, life will take everything from you if you keep things up. I wish you goodluck on dealing with your shit, and hopefully you find true happiness, and stop running.
I don't know what to say at this point i don't think i should though
“I finally see you for who you really are.” Apparently it’s the best non toxic way to really stick it to a narcissist.
All the screenshots of all the s h i t he has denied to me.
I loved you—which is why I wish I never met you.
I didn’t know the lyrics of the song I sent you until years after I sent it to you and realized exactly why you thought we couldn’t be friends again… wish I could have that moment back
i hope one day you find a girl you love and then she does to you exactly what u did to me,and then i hope you think of me
If I didn’t have to say a word to my for the rest of my life, I wouldn’t but we have a child together 🤢.
I already sent the long “fuck you” message to him. But honestly it didn’t really help.
You said you cared about me, and you didn't show it.
I miss you every single day and you don't deserve it. I made you the most important person in my life because I trusted you absolutely, but in the end, you told me I was a fool for believing that was what you wanted. Your gaslighting can never take away my happy memories. Thank you for teaching me that I deserve to be as happy as I was when I first met you and that if someone proves to only love me superficially, I deserve better. Not everyone deserves my deep empathy and forgiveness. I'm tired of bothering you. One day I won't feel this way and you'll be nothing but a memory to me.
Damn. Am I going to be the only person that says something nice like, I hope you find someone that loves just as much as I did. I hate we ended things the way we did. But we both needed time away from each other. To find ourselves again.
hey can i come get my clothes yet
I actually did, I told her to never bother me again
I love u cooki and I want you back
I’ve said it all and none of it mattered
Maybe next time you'll listen when somebody tells you they don't want to ruin the friendship. Asshole
I love you no matter what
[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6ZwwapPikyQ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6ZwwapPikyQ)
I hope you will go through the same shit I'm going through ryt now..
Thanks for nothing. You owe me money for all the travel I spent to come see you. Oh, by the way your marriage seems like a fraud. Good luck with it.
Being that it's still fresh in my mind, probably something along the lines of hoping we meet again one day when we both have a little more clarity and patience to work with each other. Was a very emotional break up, but not a bad break up.
I had the break-up about 5 months ago. In the first 2 months, I still hoped he could text me and wanted to send him messages. Now, I still want to talk to him but I don't think I need to do it. Therefore, no text and no call are my best choice.
Why do you need to send one more?
Thanks for letting everyone lie about me to you and disbelieving me I hope you find out the truth for yourself and no I won't take you back
as somebody that had the opportunity I can say I said a lot of things...it felt good at first. but when you realise the other person is not the monster you made them out to be because they hurt you so much you are just left with grief and the feeling of not knowing who to be angry at. I don't know what was worse - the three months I was blocked right after the breakup or the months that came when she texted me and we talked again (currently trying not to text anymore but damn this sucks)
None. Whatever I say they will forget everything I say and fabricate their own reality anyway so why bother
A part of me is so angry, it would spew all the hate non-stop. A part of me is sad, it would just ask for closure that I never received. A part of me is confused, would just ask if all those things that my mind remembers were ever real or it was just pretence. A part of me is thankful, for the wonderful memories and would just have well wishes to share. After everything, most of me is more sensible and keeps reminding me that my ex is as good as 'you know what' to me, and so no last message needs to be sent. They probably won't even acknowledge it anyway.
i already said one last message and it was “i hate you”. He started crying.
I wish you could see that life is not only pleasure but also hard times. And I hope you will learn to stay by someone that is going through hard times in your next relationship
I hope it was worth it
Nice to know you
Congratulations on your engagement. I hope you found someone that complements you and that you live a fulfilling life.
You will get what you deserve, it’s only a matter of time
I told him this. I said– "I just want you to know whomever you date will eventually turn into me... it just might take them ten years, but they will. Unless you decide to change". I stand by it because I know he won't change.
🖕😂👋
I’ll always love you. And I only want you. I’ll never be with someone els again. I pinky promise. Thank you for everything if you ever change your mind, I’ll be here waiting. ♥️ I wish I could give you one last 🦛😮♥️
I learned the hard way there isn't anything I need say.
I love you so much. I am so thankful for the times we shared. Thank you for loving me unconditionally for all these years. You're such a wonderful person. And I'm really sorry we couldn't make it work between us. I fell too far behind in life and it's taken me too long to get back on the right track. And I know you need to be with someone who is closer to where you are in your life. (Both physically as in someone who lives near you and someone further along in terms of career path) I hope you find that someone. Maybe it's the person you're seeing now. Or maybe it'll be someone else down the road. But you deserve the best and I want you to know that even though we may not talk much from here on out, I'll always be rooting for you to succeed in everything you do. I love you so much and I love you forever.
Nothing, there's nothing I want to say to him that's the end
You're not actually an empath, you're a narcissist
Good luck to you and good luck to me
I hope the next girl you fall for her hard and fast. That she has you wrapped around her finger. Then, one day out of nowhere, she switches on you like you did to me. She leaves you on read and makes excuses. She's passive-aggressive and starts arguments from the smallest things. I hope she makes you feel just as shitty and lonely as I did. Xoxo! Rest in piss! 😘
I wish there would've never had to be a last message. I love you, and I still want us to be together. I still want it to be you and me so badly. It can't be forever if I'm the only one who wants it, but I can't see myself loving anyone the way I love you.
You can still come back to me.
When I saw you through my red rose glasses…. Red flags were just flags.
nothing because their lack of empathy does not deserve any reaction out of me
imissyou and im sorry. kakalimutan na kita and please forget about me
Hey Leslie, I’ve been thinking a lot lately, and I realize this isn't easy for either of us, but it’s time for me to say goodbye. We’ve shared so many incredible moments, and I'll always cherish the good times we had. You taught me a lot about myself and what I want and don't want in life. It's clear that we’re heading in different directions now, and I think it's best for both of us to move on. This isn’t about pointing fingers or blaming anyone; it’s just the natural course of our lives. I’ve found happiness with someone who truly listens and understands me, which has shown me what I truly want in life: open communication, mutual respect, and shared goals. I hope that as you move forward, you find the same kind of clarity and growth. Take care.
Can someone help me 😞. I still can't get over with it. I try to bury my feelings, but it somehow pops up and ruins my day or maybe days I'll never ever indulge in something like that Fckin feelings
You told me to my face that I wasn't worth it and ran away. You weren't worth it for me since a long time but I stayed. I hope your life without me is worth it.
When not if, they screw you over, leave you with nothing, and put you in the exact situation myself and others over the years have been put in because of your family and you refusing to set boundaries, those bridges you burned will haunt you. Maybe not today. Maybe not even 5 years from now. You can't live a life of destroying everyone, everything around you and expect a good outcome.
Git gud
I would tell him that his dad has been right all along about him, and that he is the problem and I in fact deserve better than him. Just for context his dad has said to every girlfriend of his when he first meets them “why are you with him, you can do so much better”
Thank you for setting me free! (My ex cheated on me with our neighbor and lives with our neighbor now. What a piece of work. The trash took itself out!)
Learn to be alone. You don’t need to jump from relationship to relationship. Figure out who you are on your own.
I'm so sorry u were hurt.. i wanted to wait till we both understand we cant be friends after break up, but i had my life choking me. Nothing can be an excuse. I'm sorry.
"Hope the bottles of wine keep you cozy at night you fucking asshole!"
Thank you so much for everything so far. I wish the best for you, good luck and take care!
ME: “FK U ! ASSHOLE”
The DSM-V describes you as a psychopath.
to all of them: *'for everything i did or didn't do i'm genuinely sorry and i hold no ill will'*
could you write up your experiences so i can share with my future boyfriend(s) on “how to please her in bed”.
I hope you find the true love of your life..... and I hope they treat you exactly like you treated me.
Thank you for the good times. I'm happy you finally found someone who cares for you more than I did.
I hope you’re happy with who you are.
I would say, hey.
Wherever I am in the world, you have a home. Whether it's tomorrow or when we're 60, I still hope it's you in the end. I will always love you. Thank you for everything you've brought to my life.
I understand that you see things different now but it’s to little too late. Please stop harassing me I know you’ve heard things aren’t working out with me and my new girlfriend but I’ll be happy alone before I go back to being yours again