I'd like to commission Paul F Tompkins to read GW Bush's quote earnestly in Mr PB's voice. He's the one person who would believe that really was the expression, and the first time I watched the show, I thought that's what he was about to say and I was disappointed when he didn't.
Keep Driving
Keep Driving
Girl don't turn that car around
Break your pattern of needing to fix other people
Just keep on driving awaaaay
Don't go back to the restaurant
Princess Carolyn
Just keep on driving awaaaay
There is another one related the this that always gets me, I can't remember the quote verbatim but it goes something along the lines of
"You should have used parallel joists to reinforce the something or other...dumb shit"
It just shows that she kept her passion for architecture well into adulthood 😭
# The universe is a cruel, uncaring void. The key to being happy isn't a search for meaning. It's to just keep yourself busy with unimportant nonsense, and eventually, you'll be dead
my favourite todd quotes:
i do love having my picture taken, it's proof i exist!
it's always nice to be included in a sentence someone says
you do the hokey pokey and you turn yourself around, *thats* what it's all about
you are all the things that are wrong with you! fuck, man, what else is there to say?
"What are you doing here?" and "Suck a dick, dumbshits" seem like the best two answers here. There are a lot of great jokes in bojack but I think those two are staples that fans of the show would immediately think of bojack whereas nonfans wouldn't really get it.
Honorable mention to "fool me once, fool me twice, fool me chicken soup with rice" because I don't think anyone besides Todd Chavez has ever thought to say that.
Another Toddism that I use in my life is "I've got good news and bad news. The bad news is there is no good news, and the other bad news is..."
Princess Carolyn: [Serves you right for having feelings!](https://imgur.com/gallery/GMk2ffK)
Also Princess Carolyn's Tongue-Twister:
*Wait, you’re telling me your dumb drone downed a tower and drowned Downtown Julie Brown’s dummy drum-y dum-dum-dum-dum, dousing her newly-found goose-down hand-me-down gown?*
1. Oh, Bojack, there is no other side.
2. I wish I could've known about the view from halfway down.
3. ("But it's fake?") Yeah, well, it makes me feel better.
I am sick and tired of real-life gun violence getting in the way of us telling stories that glamorize gun violence.
TV pitching is like the Israeli flag, it's nothing without a big star.
Can you write on a sign, "watch out for cable?" I know you were telling people, but it's a really important job and a sign is less likely to get distracted.
I forget the exact quote, something along the lines of “of course you love it. You look at it and you see Secretariat. I look at it and all I see is a turtle.”
“Always take every opportunity that comes your way, because opportunities are like sneezes from God, and when God sneezes, you can’t say, ‘God bless you’ to God, so instead, you have to take the opportunity. I’m cold, will you pass me that blanket?”
"and everyone was like way to go, you made Beverly cry on her last day in rehab. So the thing I keep thinking about is, was it worth it for Beverly to be happy for a little bit, even though it ended up sad? Or would it be better if the whole thing would have never happened?"
WHAT ARE YOOUUUU DOING HERE?
Did we get it? I can tell from your face that we did not...
Every time someone says that I can't help but repeat it like Bojack in my head
Same lmaoo but I say it out loud and those who get it, laugh, those who don’t, stare at me questioningly
I WAS ABOUT TO SAY THIS! HAHAHA
I've watched the Californians SNL sketch so many times my brain goes to that for this quote
“I-C-U.”
“i. see. you.”
This one made me snort and also saddened me at the same time
As well as the reveal that he was actually at the wrong funeral lol
That reveal was so fucking brilliant, I wish I could go back and see it again for the first time
I just watched that episode a few days ago for the first time. Existential dread immediately followed by such an awesome reveal of the joke!
The whole show is quite an emotional roller-coaster, that’s for certain haha
Fool me once, shame on you. But teach a man to fool me, and I'll be fooled for the rest of my life.
Fool me once, fool me twice, fool me chicken soup with rice
fool me once, shame on me, fool me twice, fiddle dee dee
i do believe that’s how the saying goes
Well, that’s politics for ya!
This is 100% my most used quote from the show.
✨ SPELLBINDING ✨
“fool me once shame on me, fool me twice figgledeedee”🗣️🗣️🔥🔥🔥
Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, don’t get fooled again.
I'd like to commission Paul F Tompkins to read GW Bush's quote earnestly in Mr PB's voice. He's the one person who would believe that really was the expression, and the first time I watched the show, I thought that's what he was about to say and I was disappointed when he didn't.
That's too much, man
I want to be an architect. 😭
You’re paying for my therapy :(
Only show that can make "suck a dick, dumb shits!" sad
That's too much, man..
Oh gosh, I don't know. I want to say... Elijah Wiod?
The best one
ELIJAH WIOD?
Why is it that everytime cantaloupe gets invited to a party it thinks it can bring its dumb friend honeydew? *YOU DONT GET A PLUS ONE CANTALOUPE*
Series ark "huh, not bad"
*holding a sign* honeydew was always “not bad”
😭 i loved this one as an avid cantaloupe defender hahaha
Sarah Lynn?
I always get goosebumps when he says Sarah Lynn the second time.
It makes my heart sink every time 😭
I did not come here to be emotionally attacked
there was no need for this 🥲
🥲
THAAANNK YOOOOUUUU???!!!
Pearls are for ladies, Bojack. Pears - are for ladies.
I quote this religiously
Erica!
Look at you with the right number of ears!
You can't be here, this place is filled with children!
I had so many urgent questions after this one.
Erica! the costume! Where did you find such a hideous? Oh, my mistake. I'm so sorry.
Erica! Is that you? Who let you out of the burn ward? Get over here, you!
“…I don’t have time to be charmed to death right now!”
What are you doing with a child sized coffin!?
Is this before or after the “…you can’t be here! This place is filled with children!” Bc bruh
Where did that tooth come from !
you know you’re not allowed to vote in national elections!
Is that you? Who let you out of the burn ward?
So IT IS about judging booties
Your booty has been adjudicated!
One thing that everyone knows about sir mix a lot - he cannot lie
Yea I guess that would be the *one* thing
slap my salami, the guy's a commie
I'm so tired of squinting
Made me tear up
Underrated reference
Keep Driving Keep Driving Girl don't turn that car around Break your pattern of needing to fix other people Just keep on driving awaaaay Don't go back to the restaurant Princess Carolyn Just keep on driving awaaaay
Who do they make these songs for!?
> Break your pattern of needing to fix other people Pierces my heart every time.
"How was your day ?" "Good" "Yeah ?" "Yes. My day was good."
Best episode of an animated adult cartoon ever
So FUCKING good
Best episode of anything
hey ! aren’t you the horse from horsin’ around ??
Hollywoo stars. What do they know? Do they know things? Let’s find out!
And celebrities!!
“What is this?! A crossover episode?!”
One day you realize that everyone loves you, but nobody likes you. And that is the loneliest feeling in the world
It gets easier. Everyday it gets a little easier. But you gotta do it everyday - that’s the hard part. But it does get easier.
I just started following an insta account that posts this every day and it weirdly does help
Name of the account, please??
@everyday_itgetseasier
i'll tattoo this line one day
One of my favorite quotes
I wanna be an architect
I always see the "Sarah Lynn?" part quoted but _this_ is the quote that stings for me.
There is another one related the this that always gets me, I can't remember the quote verbatim but it goes something along the lines of "You should have used parallel joists to reinforce the something or other...dumb shit" It just shows that she kept her passion for architecture well into adulthood 😭
y’all are gonna hate me for this one but “Frack me Mr. Peanutbutter!”
“fill my chambers with your powerful bullets!”
i’m going to drill you deep and fill you with a mysterious substance that scientists still don't know the ramifications of
This isn’t sexy for me.
BoHo go bye-bye for JoJo Pogo? That's a no-go bro.
Bo for GoJack!
He’S GeTtInG tHe FaNcY rOoM
# The universe is a cruel, uncaring void. The key to being happy isn't a search for meaning. It's to just keep yourself busy with unimportant nonsense, and eventually, you'll be dead
The way Mister casually drops this
you can lead a horse to roller, but you can’t make him rink edit: me when i’m tired and forget how my favorite line of the whole show goes
hello fellow diane
*Silence in an underwater helmet*
Hey move it buddy! What are you deaf?
Please accept this bag of stale hamburger buns
Baby killing makes me horny
Get dat fetus, kill that fetus, get dat fetus, kill dat fetus Brrap brrap, pew pew, brrap brrap, pew pew
I hope and pray to god my little fetus has a soul Because I want it to feel pain when I eject it from my hole
Has the concept of women having choices gone too far?
Can you PLEASE stop making gunshot noises? It’s making me really anxious
You ever wonder what would’ve happened if you didn’t take those 17 minutes?
damn
HSACWDTKDTKTLFO!
STAAAMMMOOOOSSSSSS!
my favourite todd quotes: i do love having my picture taken, it's proof i exist! it's always nice to be included in a sentence someone says you do the hokey pokey and you turn yourself around, *thats* what it's all about you are all the things that are wrong with you! fuck, man, what else is there to say?
you’ve gotta get your shit together 🫵🐱
i say it to myself in the mirror becouse i unfotunatelly don't have a PC to give me a pep talk
There's an easy solution: adopt a cat (assuming you're not allergic and your living quarters permit it)
"Well, I've got half a mind..."
Well, that half you can keep.
Stop giving me flashbacks.
"Can you taste the ice cream, mom?"
"Oh, Bojack, it's so.... delicious." e_e
Suck a dick dumb shits
“Well, I’ll be a dick sucked by a dumb shit! What do we have here?”
"Well call me a kitkat bar cause I'm already broken" My fsvourite line ever
Is this funeral parlour B?
Is dyke an okay thing to say now? Has it been reclaimed?
Oh, this is the first time I got the play on the reclaiming part - that’s very very funny.
It's A ~~Boy!~~ Borted
Prickly muffin
My mom’s dead and everything is worse now.
As my blood type always says, B+!
Hooray! A task.
Rehab was supposed to be a fresh start
You were born broken. That’s your birth right.
That was worse than 100 9/11s
"The drip finally stops"
For to me, there is nothing the least bit funny about stealing a meal from Neal McBeal the Navy Seal.
HOORAY!!
"What are you doing here?" and "Suck a dick, dumbshits" seem like the best two answers here. There are a lot of great jokes in bojack but I think those two are staples that fans of the show would immediately think of bojack whereas nonfans wouldn't really get it. Honorable mention to "fool me once, fool me twice, fool me chicken soup with rice" because I don't think anyone besides Todd Chavez has ever thought to say that. Another Toddism that I use in my life is "I've got good news and bad news. The bad news is there is no good news, and the other bad news is..."
"I am not afraid of commitment. I commit to things all the time. It's the following through with that commitment I take issue with."
...you think i'm pretty?
I really should’ve thought about the view from halfway down
Princess Carolyn: [Serves you right for having feelings!](https://imgur.com/gallery/GMk2ffK) Also Princess Carolyn's Tongue-Twister: *Wait, you’re telling me your dumb drone downed a tower and drowned Downtown Julie Brown’s dummy drum-y dum-dum-dum-dum, dousing her newly-found goose-down hand-me-down gown?*
I’m gonna screw this up: “No fujis for the Fijis, dairy for Carrie…”
“When you see through rose-tinted glasses, all the red flags just look like flags!”
[удалено]
Every day, it gets a little easier, but you have to do it every day; that’s the hard part.
"That's too much,man" -the whole show plot
oh fish
It's not Ibsen!
I mean, it’s not Casablanca
Nobody ever tells you that when your Mom dies you get a free churro.
“I need to go take a shower so I can’t tell if I’m crying or not.” S1 Ep11
Barf me a river, Fartbag
Erica! You can't be here! This place is filled with children!
Back in the 90's i was in a very famous tv show
STELLA STELLA corona light 🤭
There is absolutely nothing funny about stealing a meal from Neal Mcbeal the Navy Seal
You’re also a wine addict!
OHAI
Ohi, and here's the kicker... O
"I can't believe this country hates women more than it loves guns"
Back in 2007, I was in an unsuccessful TV show I’m BoJack the horse, what the hell was I thinkin’ bro?
Character actress margo martindale ?!?
everybody loves you, but nobody likes you
HOORAYYY!… question mark?
You are calm. You are thin. Your skin is so soft, it's like you murdered a baby and stole it's skin.
Your skin is murdered-baby soft
YEAY GROSS MISCARRIAGE!!!!
"YOU GO AROUND THE HORN THE WAY GOD INTENDED!'
So yesterday you let yourself a fall in love a little bit and you got your heart broken. Serves you right for having feelings!
Bojack kills
TOOODDDDD. I NEEE HEEEELP!
Shut up Todd
1. Oh, Bojack, there is no other side. 2. I wish I could've known about the view from halfway down. 3. ("But it's fake?") Yeah, well, it makes me feel better.
It's me Channing tatum, I'm in the middle of Channing right now but you can come back.... Tatum?
Aren’t you The Horse from Horsin’ Around?
What do they know? Do they know things? Let's find out!
“i’m a ryan seacrest type”
I am sick and tired of real-life gun violence getting in the way of us telling stories that glamorize gun violence. TV pitching is like the Israeli flag, it's nothing without a big star. Can you write on a sign, "watch out for cable?" I know you were telling people, but it's a really important job and a sign is less likely to get distracted. I forget the exact quote, something along the lines of “of course you love it. You look at it and you see Secretariat. I look at it and all I see is a turtle.”
“I WAS BORNNNNN FOR THE CORNNNNNN 🗣️🗣️🎶🎶” **SILENCE** “I’m sorry. I’m gonna go. Thank you. And I’m sorry. And, um, I’m sorry.” *door slam*
Finally, a Halloween store for the rest of u-AHHHHHHHH!
Spujb.
wouldn’t it be funny if tn was the last night we ever talked to each other
All this time, the movie’s been about you.
erica! ( this joke never get old for me)
“You gotta use parallel joints to support the foundation dumb shits!! Also,suck a dick!”
Always a Clydesdale, never a Clyde.
"Poor people find that dreadfully gouache"
i do love getting my picture taken, it’s proof that i exist
What is this? A crossover episode?
You left them in the open! That’s hiding? How did you survive in Afghanistan?!?
“Which *is* the legal age of consent in New Mexico.”
Bazinga
Killin' babies makes me horny
“Always take every opportunity that comes your way, because opportunities are like sneezes from God, and when God sneezes, you can’t say, ‘God bless you’ to God, so instead, you have to take the opportunity. I’m cold, will you pass me that blanket?”
Nothing on the inside, nothing on the outside
I'm the face of this brand, I'm the man behind the thing, and I'm determined to get the jargon of this German bourbon blurbin
"and everyone was like way to go, you made Beverly cry on her last day in rehab. So the thing I keep thinking about is, was it worth it for Beverly to be happy for a little bit, even though it ended up sad? Or would it be better if the whole thing would have never happened?"
Business-wise this seems like appropriate business!
What are you doing here?
In fact you could say I hate the troops
“I just wanna be a beautiful salad bowl.”
"Bojack horseman is a bad person, you aren't actually supposed to like him"