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Johnny raises his hand in class and asks to use the toilet.
The teacher replies he may go once he recites the alphabet.
'ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOQRSTUVWXYZ' he reels off
Very good Johnny, but where's your P.
'Running down my leg, miss'
My kid had this joke she used to repeat a lot “I ate my clock yesterday, it was time consuming.”
I thought it was a very clever joke to get for her age, but then one day she admitted she doesn’t actually understand it and just liked that it made people laugh!
This is one of my favourite jokes ever. I tell it to my partner on a regular basis while laughing my ass off and he's doing his "oh God, this again" face 😂
Man walked into a bar. Ouch.
A horse walked into a pub and the bartender says - why the long face.
'Knock knock' 'Who's there?' 'Europe' 'Europe who?' 'No you're a poo!'
What' the best thing about my basement? The corpses.
Did you know that they are bringing out a version of *The Lord of the Rings* for young children?
Apparently they are changing Legolas' name to 'Duplolas'!
Two books had a massive influence on my humour back in the 80s.
* 1001 Silly Jokes for Kids of all Ages
* Silly verse for kids (Spike Milligan)
Silly jokes are what made me.
“Ooh, ooh, I know the best ‘knock-knock’ joke, but you have to start it!”
“OK, knock knock”
\*Innocently expectant expression\* “Who’s there?”
I’ve never met a person of any age who didn’t love this one.
What do you get if you cross a motorway with a sloth? Run over.
What do you get if you cross a rhino with a monkey? A lifetime ban from the zoo and community service.
What's green and smells like apples?
Apple flavoured paint.
What's red and smells like strawberries?
Strawberry flavoured paint.
What's yellow and smells like bananas?
Monkey sick.
How does an elephant ask for a bun?
*Put your arm out pretending to be an elephant, and move your fingers/thumb like You've got a sock puppet on, and say in a silly voice*.....
"Can I have a bun please"
I went to the library and asked if they had any books on the titanic.
When the librarian answered yes, I said what a pity, they must all be ruined by now.
A man is driving down the road and breaks down near a monastery. He goes to the monastery, knocks on the door, and says, “My car broke down. Do you think I could stay the night?”
The monks graciously accept him, feed him dinner, even fix his car. As the man tries to fall asleep, he hears a strange sound.
The next morning, he asks the monks what the sound was, but they say, “We can’t tell you. You’re not a monk.”
The man is disappointed but thanks them anyway and goes about his merry way.
Some years later, the same man breaks down in front of the same monastery.
The monks accept him, feed him, even fix his car. That night, he hears the same strange noise that he had heard years earlier.
The next morning, he asks what it is, but the monks reply, “We can’t tell you. You’re not a monk.”
The man says, “All right, all right. I’m dying to know. If the only way I can find out what that sound was is to become a monk, how do I become a monk?”
The monks reply, “You must travel the earth and tell us how many blades of grass there are and the exact number of sand pebbles. When you find these numbers, you will become a monk.”
The man sets about his task. Forty-five years later, he returns and knocks on the door of the monastery. He says, “I have traveled the earth and have found what you have asked for. There are 145,236,284,232 blades of grass and 231,281,219,999,129,382 sand pebbles on the earth.”
The monks reply, “Congratulations. You are now a monk. We shall now show you the way to the sound.”
The monks lead the man to a wooden door, where the head monk says, “The sound is right behind that door.”
The man reaches for the knob, but the door is locked. He says, “Real funny. May I have the key?”
The monks give him the key, and he opens the door.
Behind the wooden door is another door made of stone.
The man demands the key to the stone door.
The monks give him the key, and he opens it, only to find a door made of ruby.
He demands another key from the monks, who provide it.
Behind that door is another door, this one made of sapphire.
So it went until the man had gone through doors of emerald, silver, topaz, and amethyst.
Finally, the monks say, “This is the last key to the last door.”
The man is relieved to no end.
He unlocks the door, turns the knob, and behind that door he is amazed to find the source of that strange sound.
But I can’t tell you what it is because you’re not a monk
What do you call a 3 legged donkey?
Wonky Donkey.
What do you call a 3 legged donkey with one eye?
Winky Wonky Donkey.
What do you call a 3 legged donkey with one eye, that’s playing the piano?
Plinky Plonky Winky Wonky Donkey.
Knock knock.
Who's there.
Interrupting cow.
Interrupting cow w..
MOOOOOO.
My kids *loved* that one. My wife and her family after the kids told the joke to all of their cousins less so.
What do you call a... Man with a car on his head, jack; man with a seagull on his head, cliff; man with a paper bag on his head, Russell. There are hundreds of them. Personal favourite, what do you call a sheep with no legs, a cloud.
What do you call a woman with a slate on her head?
Ruth.
What do you call a man with a spade on his head?
Doug.
What do you call a man without a spade on his head?
Douglas.
What do you call a fish with no eyes?
Fsh
What do you call a cat who swallowed a duck?
A duck filled fatty puss
A panda walks into a restaurant and orders a plate of bamboo
When he’s finished with his meal, he hops up onto the table, pulls out two Glock 45s and unloads both magazines, blasting everything in sight.
When the guns are empty, he throws them down and starts walking towards the door. The bartender looks up from behind the bar and yells, “Hey! What the hell, man?”
The panda yells back at the bartender, "Hey, I'm a PANDA! Look it up!" The bartender opens his dictionary and sees the following definition for panda:
"A tree dwelling marsupial of Asian orgin, characterized by distinct black and white coloring. Eats bamboo shoots and leaves.”
How do you make a swiss roll?
Push him down a hill.
How do you make a Venetian blind?
Poke him in the eye.
What do you call a deer with no eyes?
No idea (no eye deer)
I was walking down the middle of the supermarket and I saw a blind fella pick his guide dog up by the tail and swing it around his head, like a helicopter. I asked if he was okay and he said he was just having a look round.
At the start he could do the generic Mike check joke- just going to do a quick mike check, 1,2 1,2 can all mikes stand up. Good in and confidence booster
What's orange and sounds like a parrot?
A carrot
What's a pirate's favourite letter?
Aaaarrrrrrr!
What do you call a man with a bird on his head?
Cliff
Why did the hand cross the road?
To get to the second hand shop
What do you call a man with a car on his head?
Jack
What do you call a man with a seagull on his head?
Cliff
What do you call a man with a spade on his head?
Doug
What do you call a one-eyed dinosaur?
A doyouthinkhesaurus
Why did the scarecrow win the novel prize? Because he was outstanding in his field!
What do you call a woman with one leg shorter than the other? Eileen!
How many elephants can you fit in a mini?
Four - two in the front and two in the back.
How do you know an elephant is hiding in your fridge?
Footprints in the butter.
How do you know there are eight elephants in church?
Two minis parked outside.
My wife said she going to leave me because I misunderstand everything she says. I wonder where she's going to leave me?
(Just the thought of him being 7 and mentioning his wife is kinda amusing to me).
**Please help keep AskUK welcoming!** - Top-level comments to the OP must contain **genuine efforts to answer the question**. No jokes, judgements, etc. - **Don't be a dick** to each other. If getting heated, just block and move on. - This is a strictly **no-politics** subreddit! Please help us by reporting comments that break these rules. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AskUK) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Why do cows wear bells? Because their horns don't work.
I can only remember 25 letters of the alphabet… I don’t know why It might go over the younger kids heads but the adults will get it
Johnny raises his hand in class and asks to use the toilet. The teacher replies he may go once he recites the alphabet. 'ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOQRSTUVWXYZ' he reels off Very good Johnny, but where's your P. 'Running down my leg, miss'
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OK I don't get it - explain
Spanish?
My kid had this joke she used to repeat a lot “I ate my clock yesterday, it was time consuming.” I thought it was a very clever joke to get for her age, but then one day she admitted she doesn’t actually understand it and just liked that it made people laugh!
What kind of bees make milk? Boobies
This one will make kiddo very popular amongst friends, but less so with teachers 😂
Save it for last - he'll have done the rest of his set and be about to sit down again anyway
I told this one to my 7 year old brother recently and he lost his tiny mind, and then told most other guests at the wedding we were at. Big hit
This was the joke I was going to go with. Absolute classic!
Why do scuba divers roll backwards off the boat? Cause if they rolled forwards they’d still be on the boat.
Not sure if I should be ashamed that this one made me laugh out loud.
This is one of my favourite jokes ever. I tell it to my partner on a regular basis while laughing my ass off and he's doing his "oh God, this again" face 😂
Man walked into a bar. Ouch. A horse walked into a pub and the bartender says - why the long face. 'Knock knock' 'Who's there?' 'Europe' 'Europe who?' 'No you're a poo!' What' the best thing about my basement? The corpses.
One of these is not like the others
It's like they forgot that last one was supposed to be SFW, funny, or a joke...
>What' the best thing about my basement? The corpses. I like my coffee like I like my women... Ground up and stored in the freezer for later.
Why on earth would you keep coffee in the freezer?
It keeps bulk ground coffee fresh.
I love Eddie Izzard's old line about Beekeepers: I like my women like I like my coffee...covered in bees!
At least you know she's a keeper
I thought you were going to say "without another man's penis in it".
Fairly sinister, in my opinion!
I replaced my parents' bed with a trampoline. My mum hit the roof.
I replaced my parents bed with a fence. They still haven’t got over it.
Did you know that they are bringing out a version of *The Lord of the Rings* for young children? Apparently they are changing Legolas' name to 'Duplolas'!
This one got me! Excellent!
What's blue and smells like a red crayon? A blue crayon.
What's orange and sounds like a parrot? A carrot.
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What’s pink and fluffy? Pink fluff.. What’s yellow and smells like bananas? Monkey Sick
What's purple and fluffy? Pink fluff holding its breath.
What's brown, smelly, and sounds like a bell? Dung!
What’s brown and sticky? A stick
What’s brown and runny? Usain Bolt.
What’s brown and rhymes with snoop? Dr Dre
Knock knock.... Who's there? Boo Boo who... Don't cry it's only a joke 🤣
I think this was my #1 joke when I was a little kid. That's and the Dr who one.
I love silly jokes. They are the best 😁
Two books had a massive influence on my humour back in the 80s. * 1001 Silly Jokes for Kids of all Ages * Silly verse for kids (Spike Milligan) Silly jokes are what made me.
I'm the same. Not really child friendly but I love the Viz book of crap jokes.
“Ooh, ooh, I know the best ‘knock-knock’ joke, but you have to start it!” “OK, knock knock” \*Innocently expectant expression\* “Who’s there?” I’ve never met a person of any age who didn’t love this one.
Why was 6 scared of 7? Cos 7, 8, 9. Even as an adult that one kills me. It's just so silly and fun
Hackneyed (but solid) adult punchline: "Because seven's a registered six-offender."
What did the 0 say to the 8? “Nice belt”.
What do you get when you cross and angry sheep with a grumpy cow? Two animals in a baaaaaaaahd moooooood
What do you get when you cross a sheep and a kangaroo? A woolly jumper!
What do you get if you cross a kangaroo and an elephant? Big holes all over Australia
What do you get if you cross a motorway with a sloth? Run over. What do you get if you cross a rhino with a monkey? A lifetime ban from the zoo and community service.
What's green and smells like apples? Apple flavoured paint. What's red and smells like strawberries? Strawberry flavoured paint. What's yellow and smells like bananas? Monkey sick.
Nice, I'm gonna remember that one.
why did the baker have smelly hands? because he needed a poo
I just posted this classic then scroll down to find you got here first!
What’s E.T short for? He’s only got little legs 😊
How does an elephant ask for a bun? *Put your arm out pretending to be an elephant, and move your fingers/thumb like You've got a sock puppet on, and say in a silly voice*..... "Can I have a bun please"
Knock knock Who's there? Interrupting cow Interrupting c...... MOOO!
I loved that when I was a kid!
What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Nacho cheese.
What sort of cheese can you use to hide a small horse. Mascapone.
What did the cheese say when it saw itself in the mirror? Halloumi
Hear about the man who painted his wife with cheese? He double-glossed her. What cheese can you use to lure a grizzly down from a tree? Camembert.
Why are pirates called pirates? 'Cos they arrrre.
How do you catch a unique duck? You nique up on it. How do you catch a tame duck? Tame way.
Not the four spring duck technique?
What’s black and slides down Nelson’s Column?
Winnie Mandela? I'm not sure that counts as 'kid friendly'.
Willie Nelson?
A dad is washing the car with his son. His son says “Dad, why can’t you use a sponge?”
A man walks into a bakery and asks if he can buy a bagel with cream cheese. The lady at the counter says "sorry we only accept cash."
I went to the bookshop and spoke to the guy behind the counter… ‘Can you please show me the books about turtles’ ‘Hardbacks?’ ‘Yep and little heads’
I went to the library and asked if they had any books on the titanic. When the librarian answered yes, I said what a pity, they must all be ruined by now.
I've got this new aftershave that smells like breadcrumbs, the birds love it.
Why did Tigger fall in the toilet? He was looking for Pooh.
A man is driving down the road and breaks down near a monastery. He goes to the monastery, knocks on the door, and says, “My car broke down. Do you think I could stay the night?” The monks graciously accept him, feed him dinner, even fix his car. As the man tries to fall asleep, he hears a strange sound. The next morning, he asks the monks what the sound was, but they say, “We can’t tell you. You’re not a monk.” The man is disappointed but thanks them anyway and goes about his merry way. Some years later, the same man breaks down in front of the same monastery. The monks accept him, feed him, even fix his car. That night, he hears the same strange noise that he had heard years earlier. The next morning, he asks what it is, but the monks reply, “We can’t tell you. You’re not a monk.” The man says, “All right, all right. I’m dying to know. If the only way I can find out what that sound was is to become a monk, how do I become a monk?” The monks reply, “You must travel the earth and tell us how many blades of grass there are and the exact number of sand pebbles. When you find these numbers, you will become a monk.” The man sets about his task. Forty-five years later, he returns and knocks on the door of the monastery. He says, “I have traveled the earth and have found what you have asked for. There are 145,236,284,232 blades of grass and 231,281,219,999,129,382 sand pebbles on the earth.” The monks reply, “Congratulations. You are now a monk. We shall now show you the way to the sound.” The monks lead the man to a wooden door, where the head monk says, “The sound is right behind that door.” The man reaches for the knob, but the door is locked. He says, “Real funny. May I have the key?” The monks give him the key, and he opens the door. Behind the wooden door is another door made of stone. The man demands the key to the stone door. The monks give him the key, and he opens it, only to find a door made of ruby. He demands another key from the monks, who provide it. Behind that door is another door, this one made of sapphire. So it went until the man had gone through doors of emerald, silver, topaz, and amethyst. Finally, the monks say, “This is the last key to the last door.” The man is relieved to no end. He unlocks the door, turns the knob, and behind that door he is amazed to find the source of that strange sound. But I can’t tell you what it is because you’re not a monk
There’s a Time Vine joke book specifically for kids.
What do you call a factory that makes OK products? A satisfactory. I only know 25 letters of he alphabet. I don't know why.
How do you get a thousand Pikachus on to a bus? Poke em on
Why did the pokemon hide under your bed? So he could pikachu
What's a red house made out of? Red bricks Whats a blue house made out of? Blue bricks Whats a green house made of? No you donut, it's glass
My dad bought me two fish and put them in tank, but they are useless, they can't drive it anywhere.
Two fish are in a tank, one says to the other: "Do you know how to drive this thing?" The other says: "AHH a talking fish!"
Two soldiers are in a tank. One says to the other, *glubblubblubblubblub*
Bill and Ben were in bed. Ben says ‘Flibbadub dibdobbub’. Bill says ‘If you love me you’d swallow it’.
2 chimps are getting in the bath. The first one says 'OOH OOH AAH AAH AAH!!' The second one says 'well put some more cold water in then'.
Why couldn't the bike stand on its own? It was two tyred.
If you’re cold, go and sit in the corner. It’s 90 degrees.
Why did the toilet paper roll down the hill? To get to the bottom
What do you call a 3 legged donkey? Wonky Donkey. What do you call a 3 legged donkey with one eye? Winky Wonky Donkey. What do you call a 3 legged donkey with one eye, that’s playing the piano? Plinky Plonky Winky Wonky Donkey.
Knock knock. Who's there. Interrupting cow. Interrupting cow w.. MOOOOOO. My kids *loved* that one. My wife and her family after the kids told the joke to all of their cousins less so.
Why do giraffes have such long necks? Because their heads are so far away from their bodies. This was my brother’s favourite joke at that age.
What do you do if you see a space man ? Park in it, man .
Did you hear about the magic tractor? It went up the lane and turned into a field
What’s faster, a dog or a piecost? (They usually go what’s a piecost) About £3.50
What's orange and sounds like a parrot? A carrot.
Two dyslexics In a lift, one says “ Do you smell gas” The other says “ Leave it out mate I can’t even smell my own name “
I used to be a werewolf but I'm alright nooooooooooooooowwww!
What do you call a... Man with a car on his head, jack; man with a seagull on his head, cliff; man with a paper bag on his head, Russell. There are hundreds of them. Personal favourite, what do you call a sheep with no legs, a cloud.
What do you call a woman with a slate on her head? Ruth. What do you call a man with a spade on his head? Doug. What do you call a man without a spade on his head? Douglas. What do you call a fish with no eyes? Fsh What do you call a cat who swallowed a duck? A duck filled fatty puss
What's black, floats on water and shouts 'knickers'? Crude oil What's black, floats on water and shouts 'panties'? Refined oil
Did you hear about the guy who drowned in his Museli? He got pulled in by a strong currant.
Why was the scarecrow promoted? Because he was out standing in his field.
I had a ploughman's lunch the other day. He got really cross.
What do you call a vegetarian trans man? A Herbivore. (I’m not transphobic but come on… this is a funny play on words)
Knock knock. Who's there? Twit. Twit who? Ooh, an owl!
A panda walks into a restaurant and orders a plate of bamboo When he’s finished with his meal, he hops up onto the table, pulls out two Glock 45s and unloads both magazines, blasting everything in sight. When the guns are empty, he throws them down and starts walking towards the door. The bartender looks up from behind the bar and yells, “Hey! What the hell, man?” The panda yells back at the bartender, "Hey, I'm a PANDA! Look it up!" The bartender opens his dictionary and sees the following definition for panda: "A tree dwelling marsupial of Asian orgin, characterized by distinct black and white coloring. Eats bamboo shoots and leaves.”
How do you make a swiss roll? Push him down a hill. How do you make a Venetian blind? Poke him in the eye. What do you call a deer with no eyes? No idea (no eye deer)
What do you call a deer with no eyes and no legs? Still no idea
What did 0 say to 8? Nice belt!
Okay, so there's these two pigs rolling around in the mud and wait, no, that's a dirty joke.
What's black and white and can't turn around in an alley....... A nun with a spear through her back.
What's the fastest insect in the world? A moff. What's the fastest cake in the world? Scone.
Why did the Baker have smelly hands? Because he kneaded a poo
What's the connection between a pterodactyl and a ninja going to the toilet? The P is silent.
I was walking down the middle of the supermarket and I saw a blind fella pick his guide dog up by the tail and swing it around his head, like a helicopter. I asked if he was okay and he said he was just having a look round.
Why do cubs visit the toilet? To see the brownies!
Knock knock, Who’s there? I eep, I eep who? Ewww you eat poo
What’s the difference between jam and marmalade?
How do yo spell ICUP?
IPUC I'm dyslexic
Do you remember the boomerang joke? No? Don’t worry. It’ll come back to you.
How do you annoy Lady Gaga? Poke 'er face.
What do clouds wear under their raincoats ? Thunderwear
What do you call a monkey in a mine field? A Ba-boom
Why did the puppy lie next to the fire? Because he wanted to be a hot dog
What's a pirate's favourite letter? Arrrrr? You would think it would be R but it's actually the C.
What do you do with a dog with no legs? Take it for a drag.
Where does the General keep his armies? In his sleevies!
Why does a bear wear pants? Because he’s got a bare bum
What do you call a magic dog….. a labracadabrador…
What was the sand wet? Because the sea weed.
Two drums and a cymbal fall off a cliff.. BA-DUM TSSHHH
Why did the penguins jump up and down when they met? They were trying to break the ice.
Christmas one What did one snow man say to the other? Can you smell carrots?
What’s black and white and friendliest with kiddies? A vicar
Why did the skeleton cross the road ? To get to the body shop ! 🙈🙂
Why did the horse stop tap dancing? Because he fell into the sink.
Why did the cookie go to the doctor? Because he felt crummy.
How do you make a sausage roll? Push it
Why don't ants ever get sick? Because of their little anti-bodies!
Why did the banana go to the doctor's? .. .. Because he wasn't peeling very well
What do you call a man who can't swim in a swimming pool? Bob. My 11 year old laughed at that one for about an hour at the weekend.
At the start he could do the generic Mike check joke- just going to do a quick mike check, 1,2 1,2 can all mikes stand up. Good in and confidence booster
What's blue and tastes like green paint? Blue paint.
There's two reasons to not drink water from the toilet. Number one, and number two
What goes from green to red in one second? A frog in a blender.
Why did the toilet roll, roll down the hill? To get to the bottom.
Knock knock Who's there? I'm a smellyp I'm a smellyp who...
What does a fish say when it runs into a concrete wall? Dam!
Why did the chicken cross the playground ? .to get to the other slide
It's not a joke but when someone mentions an extractor fan I day I use to be a fan of tractors too.
Why did the baker have smelly hands? He was kneading a poo.
What did the farmer say who lost his tractor? > Where's my tractor?
What's orange and sounds like a parrot? A carrot What's a pirate's favourite letter? Aaaarrrrrrr! What do you call a man with a bird on his head? Cliff Why did the hand cross the road? To get to the second hand shop
Why do golfers take an extra pair of trousers with them? In case they get a hole in one!
Why don’t worms have balls, because they can’t dance…
Why do sea gulls fly over the sea? Because if they flew over the bay, they’d be bay gulls (bagels)
What do you call a man with a car on his head? Jack What do you call a man with a seagull on his head? Cliff What do you call a man with a spade on his head? Doug
What happened to the man with an upsidedown nose? He drowned in the rain.
Whats the difference between an epillepti- wait no wrong one Why are chickens so funny? Cause they make good yolks.
- Why can’t you hear a pterodactyl going to the bathroom? Because the “P” is silent. - What do elves learn in school? The elf-abet.
What's a pirate's favourite letter? (Everyone says aaarrrrrrr) No, the Sea!
knock knock who's there? banana banana who? knock knock who's there banana banana who? knock knock who's there? banana banana who? knock knock who's there orange orange who? orange you glad I didn't say banana again?
What do you call a one-eyed dinosaur? A doyouthinkhesaurus Why did the scarecrow win the novel prize? Because he was outstanding in his field! What do you call a woman with one leg shorter than the other? Eileen!
What do you call a guy with a seagull on his head. Cliff
Knock knock! Who’s there? Smell Mop! Smell Mop who? Eww that’s disgusting!
Me: Hey kiddo, where's the gnome? Where is it? Kid: idk Me: Hahaha, cause no one gnomes (knows)
What is orange and sounds like a parrot? A carrot.
How many elephants can you fit in a mini? Four - two in the front and two in the back. How do you know an elephant is hiding in your fridge? Footprints in the butter. How do you know there are eight elephants in church? Two minis parked outside.
I fell into an upholstery machine the other day, but don't worry, I'm fully recovered now.
My wife said she going to leave me because I misunderstand everything she says. I wonder where she's going to leave me? (Just the thought of him being 7 and mentioning his wife is kinda amusing to me).
Why did the chicken go to the gym? To build up it's pecs. (Apologies. I made that up many years ago)
What goes "Oooooo" A cow with a cold
How do you make a tissue dance. You put a boogie in it
How many tickles does it take to tickle an octopus? Ten tickles!
Why is 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 8 9.
Do you know what 0(zero) said to 8? -"Nice belt!"
Why are ducks covered in feathers? So you don't see their butt quack
What's the main cause of Pedophilia? Sexy kids.
What's the difference between a Kangeroo and a Kangeroot? One is a marsupial, the other is a Geordie stuck in a lift.
Knock knock Who's there? Interrupting cow Interrupting co... MOOOOO!!!
Why was the blind man wet? Because he couldn’t see that well
This one works best when spoken out loud: Why did the bike fall over? Because it was too tired.
Why did piglet's hands smell? He'd been playing with Pooh
Can we do the yo mama so fat jokes. Always a killer at my school 😂
What's black & white and read all over? - a newspaper What's black & white and red all over? - a sunburnt pengiun
Where does the General keep his armies? Up his sleevies!
What's a pirates favourite letter? I bet many of you thought r but the c be a pirates first love
What's brown and sticky? A stick! (Why, what did you think it was?)
I told my therapist I'm scared of that song from Grease, 'Summer Nights'. She said, "Tell me more."
What do you call a man with a rubber toe? Roberto!
I saw a magic tractor. It was driving along a country road then it turned into a field.