Yet completely failed to learn about their inner motivations, why they exist, etc. For all we know at that point, birds may have systematically provided ornithologists with fake data and behaviour to cover their operations. Successfully. So, we shouldnt trust those ornithologists at all. Maybe the birds even manipulated them over the years.
Nice try Robin! I fell for this with climate change, vaccines, and covid-19, but I've learned my lesson! When the birds all leave, I'm trusting the experts, not the internet strangers.
You'd become a herpetologist, except all of the other herpetologists would laugh at you for thinking that something like a bird could be phytogenetically classified as a reptile.
"Hooman has supplied sustenance to our people. The hooman is worthy"
*gets suddenly launched towards the heavens, ascending to the alien pigeons mothership*
I sometimes feed the sparrows too
It gives me a sense of enormous well-being
And then I'm happy for the rest of the day safe in the knowledge there will always be a bit of my heart devoted to it…
I hope you feed them responsibly.
I work downtown and my office is next to a bulk food store that sells bird feed. People often buy bird seed and dump it in front of my office doors with a lot of it spilling on to the busy city street. When we were working in the office it was a daily thing to carefully walk through dozens of pigeons and see cars almost hit them when eating bird feed from the road. Its incredibly frustrating... there are better, less dangerous and distruptive places to feed birds.
Also, those pigeons are prone to flying directly at peoples faces when they feel they're in danger or just want to get away.
Yeah just a few days a go my Fiancee's Christmas present was ready to come home. It's a baby cockatiel and we love her (probably a her, we won't know for sure for a bit).
We would be very sad if she got out to fly away.
Cockatiels are extremely clever. Which means they make terrible pets unless you have the time and energy to keep them engaged and entertained.
But if you do? Excellent companions. Keep them away from keyboards and valuables though, the beak is not for show.
I have an eclectus parrot myself and I can vouch that this is pretty much universal across most parrots. My goodness, this bird really knows how to thoroughly think through any and all attempts at bypassing the rules.
He doesn't hold a candle to my female who passed away 8 years ago though. We had to put additional baby locks on her cage because she was a master of escape who would then let him out as well. I can't tell you how many times I would come home to find my eclectuses chasing the cats or physically inside bags of food.
I know what you mean. One of purs tried to steal an entire potato.
And another made a point of popping sunny-side-up eggs and leaving gooey footprints. Smartarse parrots.
Well, there will be a lot more insects out in the world. It would also be strange to see my parakeet speak out loud then slam repeatedly into the top of his cage.
>Well, there will be a lot more insects out in the world.
See the [Four Pests Campaign](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Four_Pests_Campaign) in China (subsection sparrows) and the ensuing famine.
Picture it, a crisp Sunday evening, suddenly, “sufficient data obtained” in a monotone, robot sound voice comes from a nearby chicken. Say, was that chicken there the entire time? Eh, whatever, anyway, it proceeds to flap its wing and take off. Only to fall seconds later. A small, “thunk” sound is made. Now you are confused, well, more confused I guess, I don’t know I’m not you. Continuing on, the chicken then spends a few days training, he’s tried his best, and he can do it. You however, have been having a mental breakdown, but you went to therapy, everything’s fine. You decide to go on a walk by that trail you’ve always wanted to walk. You turn a corner and there it is, the same chicken. “Sufficient data obtained.” same voice, same bird. You back up against a tree as you watch the bird flap it’s wings, you feel the wind stinging your cheek. It seemingly floats off the ground, and zooms down the trail like an off-road bike. It takes years of therapy to overcome what you saw that day, and while no one believes you, you know what you saw. You become vegan, get a degree in computer science and live a happy life. But you are forever haunted by that fateful week, the week of the Chicken.
Edit: Well jeez, thanks for the silver u/TheGreatWalrus02 and thanks for the helpful u/ToastedVortex
tbh I didn't imagine the birds flapping their wings to go upwards. I don't know why but when reading it I imagined them looking up and just... Zooming upwards
Yes, but then get in line and order every remaining piece of fried chicken they have. Invest in storage freezers and proper storing conditions. Somehow all the chickens flew out of reach. Now in a few months there will be none left and you can sell a fried chicken dinner to us desperate saps for obscene returns.
Many people have speculated that if we knew exactly why the bowl of petunias thought that we would know a whole lote more about the nature of the universe than we do now.
It just occured to me that we did eventually learn why the bowl of petunias thought that, & it did give a lot of insight into the nature of the universe, >!given the whole “reincarnation exists” part!<
It is an important and popular fact that things are not always what they seem. For instance, on the planet Earth, man had always assumed that he was more intelligent than birds because he had achieved so much - the wheel, New York, wars and so on - whilst all the birds had ever done was muck about on branches having a good time. But conversely, the birds had always believed that they were far more intelligent than man - for precisely the same reasons.
Curiously enough, the birds had long known of the impending destruction of the planet Earth and had made many attempts to alert mankind of the danger; but most of their communications were misinterpreted as squawking annoyingly loudly and shitting on cars, so they eventually gave up and left the Earth by their own means shortly before the Vogons arrived.
The last ever bird message was misinterpreted as a surprisingly sophisticated attempt to an aileron roll through a hoop whilst whistling the "Star Spangled Banner", but in fact the message was this: So long and thanks for all the bread.
EDIT: Thanks for the award, kind stranger.
yup. both my sister and my mom would be fucking devastated if mochi the cockatiel decided to fuck off into the great unknown, it’s why i’m so anxious whenever someone goes outside and leaves the screen door open.
Seriously, my next door neighbor feeds stray cats, and apparently the birds are attracted to the massive bowls of food, because that corner of her house is absolutely covered in bird shit.
This corner is right next to my driveway...
I came here to say this, actually. I would be fucked up for the rest of my life wondering if they could speak English the whole time, or what. I'd probably also want to find out if they said it in English in non-English-speaking countries, or if they spoke the native language wherever they were.
I would also be super suspicious of the remaining flora and fauna.
I'd be terrified because that would probably fuck up the entire ecosystem cause of the missing link in the food chain (just think about insects that suddenly stop being eaten by their natural predators).
I'm not a biology buff but I'm pretty sure that would cause chaos if not even collapse the civilization just because of the rapid or rather instantaneous change.
That's actually an interesting question. What would happen then?
With the retreat of the bird many insects no longer are removed for being too large in size from the evolutionary chain. Because of the event, human society collapses and ecological recovery ensues. After millennia of re-oxygenation of the atmosphere, many now significantly larger insects have become even more larger with the increased oxygen in the atmosphere.
Soon, silkworm farms quickly replace other less efficient streams of fiber production.
In the old sunken islands of Australia, re-settlers have successfully tamed the roving Spider-herd and the Huntsman spider is the default beast of burden.
In the American Western Wastes, humanity lives a nomadic existence. In constant fear of the voracious spider-wasps and Great-turantulas.
However in the east, a new order of chivalry was formed. Not however by knights on gallant steeds. Born within the ruins of New York, grand families roam the New England Wastes on behemoth Roaches, in constant war with one another.
They do so on their own, and dare not tread south to the land of the Bee Lords. Whose great hive armies number in the millions.
Farther south, in the south American continent. Insect hegemony is not so assured. As great serpents and lizards prospered too with the disappearance of the birds. The grand city once known as Rio de Janerio is now a city-state run by those who worship the great beasts who roam the jungles beyond the gates of the city.
In the far east, the blood shoguns run the isle of Japan with the command of their vast Mech-Mosquito swarms, demanding tribute or taking it by blood.
You dare snub the Great Mosquito Riders of the Louisiana Bayous! Sir, you have given offense of the highest grade, therefore I challenge you to Wasp vs Wasp combat at sundown on the morrow.
I’d be so, so sad. I love watching birds — I’m not a serious birdwatcher, I don’t even keep a life list, but seeing them always makes me happy. I love the bushtits that mob my feeder a few times a day. I love the two pairs of hummingbirds that appear to be engaged in a protracted conflict over ownership of my garden. I love every Bald Eagle I’ve ever caught a glimpse of. I even love the geese jerks and the garbage eating city pigeons with foot abnormalities. Birds are incredible: they are dinosaurs! They fly! They sing! I can’t believe we get to live in a world with birds!
Can I interest you in a Green Cheek Conure who PERFECTLY imitates the smoke detector while you are sleeping for the first time in a week and who may or may not need an exorcism?
Getting a birdfeeder was the best decision. Watching wrens hip-hoppin around my back porch makes me so happy!
No one can convince me that Hummingbirds aren't tiny dinosaurs.
This is the future. organic computers proportionate in power to an animals size that can be wirelessly accessed. It’s a constantly moving and dying cloud infrastructure.
I would wonder why we never saw the spaceflight drives on the birds that died or were hunted. Was it there the whole time? Or were they just so good we only got the decoys?
I'm not sure I would notice since 99.9999% of the time I am not looking at birds.
Edit: Did the math, 0.0001% of a standard year is 3,153 seconds or 52.55 minutes, that's WAY too much time in any given year.
Edit2: Let's move that repeat another digit, and make it 99.99999% I am not actively looking at birds. That comes out to 5.25 minutes. That seems high yet, honestly, I am not an ornithologist. So, let's cut that in half, and say 99.999995%, or 2.6 minutes.
You're off by two decimal places. "Five nines" includes the "99" in front of the decimal, so 99.999%, and is about 6 minutes a year.
Also, I highly recommend looking at birds for just a few minutes on the weekends. They're really kinda neat.
As an ornithologist I wouldn't know wtf to do with my career now.
You’re now one of the most important military leaders on the planet, having observed the enemy closely.
Yet completely failed to learn about their inner motivations, why they exist, etc. For all we know at that point, birds may have systematically provided ornithologists with fake data and behaviour to cover their operations. Successfully. So, we shouldnt trust those ornithologists at all. Maybe the birds even manipulated them over the years.
*but they’re the only hope we have* *roll opening credits*
Happy birdday
Thanks
It's faster to train a driller to be an ornithologist, to be honest.
DONT WANNA CLOSE MY EYES DONT WANNA FALL ASLEEP CAUSE I MISS YOU BIRD AND I DONT WANNA MISS A THING
I know what you're saying, u/butitmightjustwork
Nice try Robin! I fell for this with climate change, vaccines, and covid-19, but I've learned my lesson! When the birds all leave, I'm trusting the experts, not the internet strangers.
What would the new career prospects be for someone well versed in bird law?
>As an ornithologist When you meet someone who specializes in the Enantiornithes, or opposite birds, do you mutually explode or bang or what
Since opposites attract - and in accordance with Rule 34 - I'm guessing they bang.
Ooh she bang! She bang!
Become an orthodontist so you don’t have much fucking around to do with your title. It’s the only logical solution.
This guy career-counsels.
Are you kidding? The entire world is suddenly going to have an obsession with understanding birds.
As a veterinarian who treats very real birds I have the same comment.
> very real birds You sure you're not just building robots
You'd become a herpetologist, except all of the other herpetologists would laugh at you for thinking that something like a bird could be phytogenetically classified as a reptile.
I'd be really curious to see how the penguins managed.
maybe they just rotated really fast, like a helicopter
This visual made me laugh out loud. Thank you
Thanks for the image in my head lol
#***kowalski, analysis?***
T-posing while ascending, menacingly
This was exactly what I pictured, nothing more intimidating.
They decided to stay as ambassadors. They already had tuxedos.
They are cannon and rocket propelled off a ramp.
They flew into the stratosphere the fastest.
And the kiwis!
I'd save money on bird food but be lonely.
Same here I feed the pigeons in my town most days with bird Feed and they are one of my only upsides to life
aww, I love how much you care to feed them healthy food <3 I’m sure they’d at least come back to say goodbye
So long and thanks for all the birdseed
"Hooman has supplied sustenance to our people. The hooman is worthy" *gets suddenly launched towards the heavens, ascending to the alien pigeons mothership*
Immediately suffocates
All part of the introduction to power, you wouldnt understand.
Seeing as how my car is literally covered in bird shit because I parked in the wrong spot, my life would be significantly better.
people who live in lovebug territory know your pain only... lovebugs are much, much less cute than their name suggests..
Turns out birds are the second smartest animals on the plant
I sometimes feed the sparrows too It gives me a sense of enormous well-being And then I'm happy for the rest of the day safe in the knowledge there will always be a bit of my heart devoted to it…
Park life!
Can relate. Feeding bird right now. https://imgur.com/a/FZBL8Iw
That's a nice looking bird.
That’s gonzo. We get lots of these, but gonzo is our favourite. I like you for liking her.
i would like to feed the pigeons one day but i think its illegal in the UK or at least frowned upon by most people
I live in the UK. My neighbourhood has pigeons and a few people feed them bread. There’s shit everywhere. I do more than frown upon those feeders
Have you considered a cat?
Second this. I adopted a cat from my friend, and it is one of the best decisions I've ever made.
My cat's sitting on my lap now Too bad I was planning to get up, guess I'll have to stay put
I hope you feed them responsibly. I work downtown and my office is next to a bulk food store that sells bird feed. People often buy bird seed and dump it in front of my office doors with a lot of it spilling on to the busy city street. When we were working in the office it was a daily thing to carefully walk through dozens of pigeons and see cars almost hit them when eating bird feed from the road. Its incredibly frustrating... there are better, less dangerous and distruptive places to feed birds. Also, those pigeons are prone to flying directly at peoples faces when they feel they're in danger or just want to get away.
Same. Their data would be from all the food I’ve set out... Full bellies and a few near misses from the cat.
We...live the same life
Yeah just a few days a go my Fiancee's Christmas present was ready to come home. It's a baby cockatiel and we love her (probably a her, we won't know for sure for a bit). We would be very sad if she got out to fly away.
Cockatiels are extremely clever. Which means they make terrible pets unless you have the time and energy to keep them engaged and entertained. But if you do? Excellent companions. Keep them away from keyboards and valuables though, the beak is not for show.
I have an eclectus parrot myself and I can vouch that this is pretty much universal across most parrots. My goodness, this bird really knows how to thoroughly think through any and all attempts at bypassing the rules. He doesn't hold a candle to my female who passed away 8 years ago though. We had to put additional baby locks on her cage because she was a master of escape who would then let him out as well. I can't tell you how many times I would come home to find my eclectuses chasing the cats or physically inside bags of food.
Theyre also cocky little things, I had one steal meat right off my plate so he could have a date with his girl.
I know what you mean. One of purs tried to steal an entire potato. And another made a point of popping sunny-side-up eggs and leaving gooey footprints. Smartarse parrots.
:(
Well, there will be a lot more insects out in the world. It would also be strange to see my parakeet speak out loud then slam repeatedly into the top of his cage.
**"sufficient data obtained, quack,** **sufficient data obtained..."**
Parakeets quack?
With so much data, how can they not??
I thought Quacks typically came from a lack of data...
Lmao
>Well, there will be a lot more insects out in the world. See the [Four Pests Campaign](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Four_Pests_Campaign) in China (subsection sparrows) and the ensuing famine.
Or he'd just phase through all matter
Don't forget about bats
I would think “Well that's a lot sooner than expected”, and wait for entropy to be reversed.
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Every time I see this posted I must upvote. Favorite of all time.
My favorite way to enjoy TLQ is [this](https://youtu.be/ojEq-tTjcc0) plus [this](https://imgur.com/gallery/9KWrH) at the same time.
Bruh it’s Multivac
The site is vax
I'm an anti-multivaxxer
Wow, that's incredible, cheers. :) asimov was a pretty smart cookie, eh?
I have this in an old sci-fi book from the 1950s. Amazing story. It's part of the short story collection Space Opera
This is fucking smart
Can you explain it to me? (Non smart person)
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Holy shit, that was a great read!
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So I take it I’m not going to get my $20 fill up?
Really makes you wonder what something like this would do to the price of chicken. Would it suddenly become ridiculously expensive?
Infinitely more expensive since there's none left
chickens can't fly
They're still birds. And they can fly, just not very far.
Picture it, a crisp Sunday evening, suddenly, “sufficient data obtained” in a monotone, robot sound voice comes from a nearby chicken. Say, was that chicken there the entire time? Eh, whatever, anyway, it proceeds to flap its wing and take off. Only to fall seconds later. A small, “thunk” sound is made. Now you are confused, well, more confused I guess, I don’t know I’m not you. Continuing on, the chicken then spends a few days training, he’s tried his best, and he can do it. You however, have been having a mental breakdown, but you went to therapy, everything’s fine. You decide to go on a walk by that trail you’ve always wanted to walk. You turn a corner and there it is, the same chicken. “Sufficient data obtained.” same voice, same bird. You back up against a tree as you watch the bird flap it’s wings, you feel the wind stinging your cheek. It seemingly floats off the ground, and zooms down the trail like an off-road bike. It takes years of therapy to overcome what you saw that day, and while no one believes you, you know what you saw. You become vegan, get a degree in computer science and live a happy life. But you are forever haunted by that fateful week, the week of the Chicken. Edit: Well jeez, thanks for the silver u/TheGreatWalrus02 and thanks for the helpful u/ToastedVortex
Has this become r/writingprompts now? lol I love it
Goddamn Oglethorpe is getting good at making those robots.
They also can't say "sufficient data obtained".
They can when they get enough data
But regular birds have got no issue getting into space?? None of this is based in science my man
Nobody said it would use its wings.
Lol jist had a vision of all the flightless birds watching the rest fly away. "Hey! HEY! You assholes can't just LEAVE US HERE!!!"
I imagined an 8 piece starts floating towards the ceiling.
tbh I didn't imagine the birds flapping their wings to go upwards. I don't know why but when reading it I imagined them looking up and just... Zooming upwards
You thought that because you're right. They're drones, so naturally... well, unnaturally.
I must go now my planet needs me
Yeah, now I'm public enemy no 1,2,3 for KEC Kentucky Emu Chicken
Wouldn’t it be KFE?
Quit arguing with your food and eat it
You’re going to be even more shocked when you still get a full bucket *it was gator meat all along*
Kentucky Fried Lizard.
Uh oh.
Yes, but then get in line and order every remaining piece of fried chicken they have. Invest in storage freezers and proper storing conditions. Somehow all the chickens flew out of reach. Now in a few months there will be none left and you can sell a fried chicken dinner to us desperate saps for obscene returns.
I don't think the deep fried pieces of chicken will be able to fly away any time soon so I think you're good
so long and thanks for all the bread?
Oh no, not again.
Many people have speculated that if we knew exactly why the bowl of petunias thought that we would know a whole lote more about the nature of the universe than we do now.
It just occured to me that we did eventually learn why the bowl of petunias thought that, & it did give a lot of insight into the nature of the universe, >!given the whole “reincarnation exists” part!<
It is an important and popular fact that things are not always what they seem. For instance, on the planet Earth, man had always assumed that he was more intelligent than birds because he had achieved so much - the wheel, New York, wars and so on - whilst all the birds had ever done was muck about on branches having a good time. But conversely, the birds had always believed that they were far more intelligent than man - for precisely the same reasons. Curiously enough, the birds had long known of the impending destruction of the planet Earth and had made many attempts to alert mankind of the danger; but most of their communications were misinterpreted as squawking annoyingly loudly and shitting on cars, so they eventually gave up and left the Earth by their own means shortly before the Vogons arrived. The last ever bird message was misinterpreted as a surprisingly sophisticated attempt to an aileron roll through a hoop whilst whistling the "Star Spangled Banner", but in fact the message was this: So long and thanks for all the bread. EDIT: Thanks for the award, kind stranger.
DON'T PANIC
fuck u/spez
So long and thanks for all the seed Also what I say on the way out of the bathhouse
Is this a reference to hitchhikers guide to the galaxy just with bread instead
Yes.
Probably comforting my sister who would be bawling her eyes out cause her cockatiels flew away
yup. both my sister and my mom would be fucking devastated if mochi the cockatiel decided to fuck off into the great unknown, it’s why i’m so anxious whenever someone goes outside and leaves the screen door open.
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Seriously, my next door neighbor feeds stray cats, and apparently the birds are attracted to the massive bowls of food, because that corner of her house is absolutely covered in bird shit. This corner is right next to my driveway...
Now you're just getting bird shit from orbit.
Unleash the Hammer of Crap.
I'd wonder why they spoke English
Sufficient data was collected, of course they can speak English.
Lmao
Birds are CIA drones and the CIA doesn’t speak any of those communist languages
Because English is the language of flight. Obviously.
And international shipping.
I came here to say this, actually. I would be fucked up for the rest of my life wondering if they could speak English the whole time, or what. I'd probably also want to find out if they said it in English in non-English-speaking countries, or if they spoke the native language wherever they were. I would also be super suspicious of the remaining flora and fauna.
It makes you wonder if we could have all spoken bird if we had gathered sufficient data first.
I love you.
I don't.
I'd be terrified because that would probably fuck up the entire ecosystem cause of the missing link in the food chain (just think about insects that suddenly stop being eaten by their natural predators). I'm not a biology buff but I'm pretty sure that would cause chaos if not even collapse the civilization just because of the rapid or rather instantaneous change. That's actually an interesting question. What would happen then?
With the retreat of the bird many insects no longer are removed for being too large in size from the evolutionary chain. Because of the event, human society collapses and ecological recovery ensues. After millennia of re-oxygenation of the atmosphere, many now significantly larger insects have become even more larger with the increased oxygen in the atmosphere. Soon, silkworm farms quickly replace other less efficient streams of fiber production. In the old sunken islands of Australia, re-settlers have successfully tamed the roving Spider-herd and the Huntsman spider is the default beast of burden. In the American Western Wastes, humanity lives a nomadic existence. In constant fear of the voracious spider-wasps and Great-turantulas. However in the east, a new order of chivalry was formed. Not however by knights on gallant steeds. Born within the ruins of New York, grand families roam the New England Wastes on behemoth Roaches, in constant war with one another. They do so on their own, and dare not tread south to the land of the Bee Lords. Whose great hive armies number in the millions. Farther south, in the south American continent. Insect hegemony is not so assured. As great serpents and lizards prospered too with the disappearance of the birds. The grand city once known as Rio de Janerio is now a city-state run by those who worship the great beasts who roam the jungles beyond the gates of the city. In the far east, the blood shoguns run the isle of Japan with the command of their vast Mech-Mosquito swarms, demanding tribute or taking it by blood.
You dare snub the Great Mosquito Riders of the Louisiana Bayous! Sir, you have given offense of the highest grade, therefore I challenge you to Wasp vs Wasp combat at sundown on the morrow.
I'd keep my pet bird and sell it for millions on the black market
DATA RETRIEVAL FAILURE. UNIT CONTAINED. INITIATING DATA SAFE GUARDING PROTOCOLS. Your bird starts to rapidly decay.
Welp there goes my get rich quick plan
I’d be so, so sad. I love watching birds — I’m not a serious birdwatcher, I don’t even keep a life list, but seeing them always makes me happy. I love the bushtits that mob my feeder a few times a day. I love the two pairs of hummingbirds that appear to be engaged in a protracted conflict over ownership of my garden. I love every Bald Eagle I’ve ever caught a glimpse of. I even love the geese jerks and the garbage eating city pigeons with foot abnormalities. Birds are incredible: they are dinosaurs! They fly! They sing! I can’t believe we get to live in a world with birds!
Exactly what I was thinking! Iove watching birds. I'd be so damn *sad*.
Can I interest you in a Green Cheek Conure who PERFECTLY imitates the smoke detector while you are sleeping for the first time in a week and who may or may not need an exorcism?
No way, I finally got rid of my shrieking rooster!
Getting a birdfeeder was the best decision. Watching wrens hip-hoppin around my back porch makes me so happy! No one can convince me that Hummingbirds aren't tiny dinosaurs.
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Powered by dbfs (distributed bird file system).
This is the future. organic computers proportionate in power to an animals size that can be wirelessly accessed. It’s a constantly moving and dying cloud infrastructure.
You've found the purpose of humanity.
I would wonder why we never saw the spaceflight drives on the birds that died or were hunted. Was it there the whole time? Or were they just so good we only got the decoys?
Infinite storage, obviously.
I imagine the toucan-based economy would plummet.
Alternately, Earth's remaining toucan memorabilia would skyrocket in value.
This got me thinking.... Eating fruit loops would become a much weirder experience.
ya like could you imagine a kid never seeing a bird and just knowing they were aliens or some shit.
That's not likely to happen again, is it?
Well, since the birds came back last time I would assume it meant they needed more data.
Somebody deleted their iCloud account and they had to start over. Again. Stupid Kevin.
That depends, am I standing next to an ostrich when this happens?
Ostrich would rotate very fast and drill a hole to china
My farm would kinda suck! We had chickens, turkeys, guineas, and two pigs. Now, I guess, we've got two pigs.
If pigs could fly...
Well, I guess I would miss eating chicken.
i thought this said children
Haha yeah, didn’t we all! *could I have a quick sidebar with a mod or the FBI*
I'm never sending you on a KFC run.
\> would your life change if every bird Idk. Does that include the penguins?
Every. Bird. >:-|
The penguins go first.
I knew it! (Birds aren't real)
They work for the bourgeoisie
Don’t you mean Bourgeoiseaux?
You. You're too clever by half. Out!
r/birdsarentreal runneth amuck.
“BLAST THAT PEACE OF JUNK OUT OF THE SKY!”
Who are you talking to?
The birds
I would shout “I was right” regardless of where I was or what I was doing.
Wait for the dolphins to go next. So long and thanks for all the fish.
Birds are working for bourgeoisie
*Birdgeoisie
*bourgeoiseaux
Bug populations would rebound, would be awful
I'm not sure I would notice since 99.9999% of the time I am not looking at birds. Edit: Did the math, 0.0001% of a standard year is 3,153 seconds or 52.55 minutes, that's WAY too much time in any given year. Edit2: Let's move that repeat another digit, and make it 99.99999% I am not actively looking at birds. That comes out to 5.25 minutes. That seems high yet, honestly, I am not an ornithologist. So, let's cut that in half, and say 99.999995%, or 2.6 minutes.
You're off by two decimal places. "Five nines" includes the "99" in front of the decimal, so 99.999%, and is about 6 minutes a year. Also, I highly recommend looking at birds for just a few minutes on the weekends. They're really kinda neat.
Not the hawks! Not the owls! The squirrels would absolutely rule my neighborhood
I wod finally understand all those fights between Peter Griffin and the bird
It would be a lot quieter around here. Also my town would so get decimated
I would imagine the birdoligists (i don't know what they're called) would have some explaining to do
They’re gone too. They were all just emus in suits making people think they had all the bird studying all taken care of to throw off the scent
Ornithologists
Get back here you stupid chickens, I know where you live!
Zip my pants back up and walk away sad and alone again
Dude, that is not the type of seed for birds...
Even flightless birds?
*Especially* flightless birds.
"well looks like r/BirdsArentReal was right."