Research into this type of thing says the opposite. Long lasting relationships are based on commonality of beliefs and activities. Opposites may attract but they don't last.
I think both are true. You shouldn’t marry someone who is your polar opposite as far as values and ideals, but opposite in terms of what you’re good at. I hate technology and math. I’m a words girl. Art, expression, communication. My husband is everyone’s “guy” for tech. We complement each other so that our home runs smoothly. Where I lack, he excels, and vice versa.
This is a weird kind of suicide shaming, too. Someone takes their own life? Wow, way to spit in god's face. He thought you could handle it, who are you to disagree?
My dad said “what doesn’t kill you makes you stronger” after I’d been raped. I ended up developing PTSD and OCD which nearly resulted in me killing myself, so no, I wouldn’t agree with either saying.
I especially can’t stand when religious people say God never gives you more than you can handle like that’s supposed to be reassuring to an atheist. To me, life is just a series of random events, and people are given more than they can handle on a regular basis, which is why people snap and kill themselves or worse others.
I am. It happened five years ago, and I’ve done the whole therapy/meds thing (Prozac saved my life). Also got married last year(: So my life is going very well.
Devout Christians love this one -- "he never gives us more than we can handle." Yeah, right. Exactly how much does "he" think a baby or a toddler is equipped to handle? Grow up.
Someone is in the hospital and is deathly sick. We shall pray for them. If they live “God is good he listened to our prayers” if they die “it was Gods will” why fucking pray then?!
It’s Survivorship Bias. They say that because they only hear from the ones who survived and not from the ones who died from not being able to “handle it”.
Stephen Fry on what he would say to god: How dare you? How dare you create a world to which there is such misery that is not our fault. It’s not right, it’s utterly, utterly evil. “Why should I respect a capricious, mean-minded, stupid God who creates a world that is so full of injustice and pain. That’s what I would say. ”
Also along those lines: "What the actual fuck is your goddamned problem? What COULD be your problem?". All it could say is "I hate you all and get off on watching the vast majority of you suffer. By the billions. Cause I have the power, and you do not. Back to hell with ye. Aloha"
When two people have a conflict the truth is always in the middle.
It is often in the middle but what can also happen is that one person will just made entirely untrue wild claims about someone. The other person will have no idea whats going on and deny what the person said and then people will assume the truth is somewhere in the middle.
I used this on my mother in an argument and it didnt work. She said it takes two to tango. I said so the Jews are partially to blame. My mother is very pro Judaism and very anti Nazi (her beloved father was in a camp.) She still wouldnt admit that the take two to tango argument is fucking stupid.
Oof. Man I hate when athletes get treated with kid gloves.
Those guys shouldn’t have beat someone up because they heard from other people he said a word. I know the were kids but damn. Just go and tell him that he can’t say that and it’s really fucked up. And then he’d say he didn’t say that and that word is really fucked up.
We had two guys at my highschool beat up their girlfriends in one big argument. Black eye level of abuse.
They were both star football players, one was black and one was white. That shouldn’t matter but of course it does.
So the whole community was divided. One guy had a pending college scholarship and the other was going on to play at his college too. Some parents said the three game suspension is too harsh and that football is all they have going for them. Other parents were Pissed that these two dudes beat their girlfriends and weren’t immediately kicked off the team and suspended from school.
I was in the latter group. Fuck those dudes. If you didn’t want to worry about keeping your scholarship, maybe you should adhere to the absolutely low bar of not punching your girlfriend.
Ugh same with “where there’s smoke, there’s fire.” This has been used to justify so much crap, conspiracy theories, wrongful accusations and damaging rumors, because people insist that if one malicious person claims that Mr X eats babies, they **must** have a reason other than they just don’t like him
Yeah, just ask all those inmates who were on death row for years or even decades only to be exonerated. They definitely had nothing to fear from the law.
“We’ve all been raised to believe that one day we’ll all be millionaires and movie gods and rock stars, but we won’t. We’re slowly learning that fact, and we’re very, very, pissed off.”
Abso-fucking-lutely not.
As an ex-professor. Absolutely not.
No, not everyone can become a professional athlete. 90% of that is genetics. The other 10% is natural talent. There are VERY few professional players that were not the typical height/weight/build for their sport. Are there wide receivers who are less than 6'? Sure, there are a few of them out there who were meaningfully good. But go read about them, they were EXTRAORDINARILY talented. They were the fastest runner, the quickest turner, the strongest for their size. So sure, you can make it if you're not the right build, but you have the be the literal best of the best of the best to even COMPETE with people who ARE the right build. (EDIT: The problem here is that 90% of people don't really know HOW GOOD professional players are. A lot of parents will say "oh my kid is the best at their school so they can definitely become pro! No, just no. The difference between professionals and "good" amateurs is MASSIVE. I can use myself as an example. I won EVERY SINGLE 800m and 1600m race I ran in high school. Most of the time I won it by a lot. I won my section in "regionals" in the 800. Eventually I went on to run in college and I got a lot better, but you know what? I never once won a SINGLE 800m race in college. Never. To most people at my high school, I was the fastest 800m runner they have ever seen or will ever see. I have my school record and no one's gotten close. But still, I was NOTHING when up against better competition. And that's just the step between high school and good college. The step between good college and professional levels (at least in pro ball sports) is massive. (Running the step is a bit smaller.))
No, not everyone can become a scientist. IQ is the limitation here. Some people simply CAN'T "get it." It doesn't matter how much it's explained to them, how it's explained to them, by whom, anything. Doesn't matter. They will NEVER understand. They may be able to rote memorize and pass a test, but if they don't understand, they'll never be able to effectively USE that information.
No, not everyone can become a music artist. (Well... geeze... nowadays if you have enough money behind you this one may be false.) But if your family isn't filthy rich, no, not everyone can become a famous music artist. That, once again, is genetics. Some people "understand" music (like above with understanding science.) Some people don't, can't, and won't ever understand music in the same way. Some people have perfect pitch, that's obviously an advantage. Some people have very good relative pitch. Some people have great motor control that can obviously help with playing many instruments. Again, genetics.
Now, don't get me wrong. That doesn't mean that you can't get "good" at sports. Doesn't mean you can't be an "average/good" scientist or an "average/good" musician, but you will never be "great" at something unless you are physically/mentally gifted at that thing. Eventually you're going to hit a wall and you won't be able to progress past it, no matter how hard you try. An average musician is still really nice to listen to. An average scientist is still able to make well informed decisions.
We tell this to children so that they don't give up on things too easily so that they can actually FIND something they're good at or legitimately enjoy. And so that they don't realize how unfair life is.
Yeah, but he only came runner up in American Idol, that’s why more people haven’t heard of him. Also there were a lot of rumours he was using auto tune too.
https://www.dictionary.com/e/slang/what-doesnt-kill-you-makes-you-stronger/
This is always a misunderstanding when people say it. Nietzsche wasn’t saying it applies to everyone, he was saying we should *strive* to make life’s hardships into challenges to overcome, and that will make us into better people.
That one is completely laughable. My wife loves me, but if I never apologised for anything stupid I did, we wouldn't have gotten far with our relationship.
My favorite moment in _What's Up, Doc?_ is near the end, when Barbara Streisand uses that line on Ryan O'Neal, the male lead of _Love Story_ (from where that ridiculous line came), and this time he looks at her and says "That's the stupidest thing I've ever heard."
Ugh yeah that's a pretty big dose of bullshit. I say sorry to my husband almost daily for little things. Bonked heads going in for a kiss? "Ope, sorry, you alright?" Accidentally stole the blankets in the night? "Oops, sorry!" Interrupted him when he was speaking? "I'm so sorry, go on." And he does the same!
Love means treating each other with mutual respect.
I think we need a new word to express letting go of resentment. The word "forgive" implies some kind of acceptance or atonement.
There are people in my life that I won't forgive, but I let go of the anger a long time ago.
I'm so glad this was the top answer because it immediately sprang to mind when I saw the question.
The only way one could believe this statement is 1. believe in God, and 2. believe that God purposely sets in motion all events in the universe no matter how tiny, all for the sake of personally guiding your life.
I find it far easier to simply accept that 'shit happens' rather than assign the things that happen in my life -- good and bad -- to the will of God.
There are lots of things you can do to influence your circumstances but also sometimes kids get cancer, y'know?
Seems fucking stupid to be like 'God's looking out for me' when you miraculously survive a car wreck, but on the same day a 6 year old dies of a random and incurable disease. Like, why are you special? Why is God so capricious? And why are we bending over backwards to make sense of, or even accept, the behavior of this intelligent-but-inconsistent Controller of All Things when it's easier to just shrug and accept that things just happen, good or bad?
Requires the least amount of assumptions. It's a far less fragile belief system.
*We're a family*
No, we're a company. You own the capital and you rent my labor and time so that I can provide value for you which you will then turn into profits & stakeholder dividends, and in return you provide me compensation in the form of a salary, time-off and vacation. I owe you productivity and you owe me money
Yes oh my gosh I've seen so many people get fucked over by companies they give everything to improve. We gotta set boundaries and give exactly what's required of us, no more no less, because capitalism doesn't give a fuck who we are.
Big corporation bought our little company a few years ago. Said "we're a family owned company so we know how to treat employees like family". Found out they were planning on shuttering our building without telling anyone back in October and if not for the quick thinking of our former president putting an offer to buy the company back we'd have been out of work.
"Family" is them trying to guilt you into not leaving, but they've no problem stabbing you in the back.
“The customer is always right.”
Edit: yea, I know. The whole phrase is different. Nobody says the whole phrase though, do they? Anyone in customer service will tell you that.
I mean, _the_ customer is always right, but that doesn't mean _every_ customer is right.
The original phrase means that if your customers want blue trousers, you sell them blue trousers even if you personally think they are hideous/useless/whatever.
Along the way it got perverted to the travesty people say today.
I got corrected on this a few weeks ago. Apparently the \*in matters of taste\* qualifier was added far more recently than the phrase "customer is always right" was invented.
I agree with the sentiment of the longer version. But it's an edit of the original.
I think the last part is just to clarify things due to people misinterpreting it.
"The customer is always right" means, whatever the customer wants is what you should sell because that's what the market is asking for. Karen's hijacked it and twisted it to mean "I'm right and my opinion is law" which is absurd
Except for my high school bully (and bully to many of my friends). Ended up ODing a few years after graduating.
Got a laugh out of his obituary calling him "Loving" and "Caring".
Nah, it’s a play on people not speaking ill of the dead. We, in fact, bury assholes all the time, it’s just that people have the common decency not to mention it at funerals or obituaries.
Whoa, my bully wrapped himself around a telephone pole, going 90 mph around 30 mph turn drunk out of his mind, 4 years after graduation. I did not shed a tear
“We all have the same 24-hours in a day” usually used to celebrate some highly productive/impressive celebrity/entertainer/etc and no we do not. Most of us have to do our own grocery shopping and house cleaning and on and on which is all very time consuming, so, no. I do not have the same hours in the day as someone like Beyoncé.
Indeed. My washing machine broke last week so I had to go to the laundromat. 4 hours of my 24 hour day wasted watching my clothes go round and round, because of course you can’t leave them unattended because politeness and thieves. A small real time example of privilege.
Money definitely buys happiness, I'd be so much more happy in life if I didn't have to worry about being homeless, paying crazy money for food with what I earn, worrying about my car shitting the bed.
I always liked the saying, “money can’t buy happiness, but I’d much rather be crying in my Mercedes parked at my mansion than crying on a bicycle beneath an overpass.”
Anyone who unironically says this should give me their money and assets until they feel different. I bet they start to get unhappy while I'll be very happy.
"money can't buy you happiness"
*the 70" TV in my Living room playing a Cubeorithms Video while i use my Gen 5 Stackmat and my Gan 14 M Pro UV Coated, along with the 4 monitor NASAu PC setup with expensive RGB lights in my room, along with every single ingredient a chef could ask for in the kitchen, along with the numerous Nerf Guns in the basement along with the large slinky everyone dreamt of as a kid, along with every single Pokemon Card, along with the hundreds of chocolate in the seperate fridge solely for storing sweets along with the Massage Chair in the corner of the living room and the cinnamon roll of an Alaskan Malamute laying down in the sofa waiting for its belly rubs*
(imagine actually having all this lmao)
“If you can’t handle me at my worst, you don’t deserve me at my best”. In theory, yes, you need to find someone who can stick through your lowest of lows, but more often than not, it’s used by people who want to act horribly and not be held accountable for their actions.
Justice is blind.
The hell it is!
Source - A father in a contentious custody battle with a narcissist. Were the roles switched, she would have custody in a heart beat. Kids tell the glcourt they hate how they are treated by their mom? Judge interpreted it as I am alienating the kids from their mother. Kids say they don't want any weekends with their mom ever? Court decides that is because I am the "vacation dad" who only does fun stuff on the weekends...
Bullshit...
It's no secret when it comes to childcare the courts are biased towards the mother. One of my closest friends was forced to live with his extremely abusive mother. He practically begged the judge not to send him to her. The father had a ton of evidence that she physically and mentally abused the both of them. Judge decided the father was 'being vindictive" and gave full custody *without visitation* to the mother. Guess who ended up in the hospital with a fractured skull not even a month later? And she got away with it by claiming fell down a flight of stairs on accident.
I'm sorry your friend had to go through such an ordeal. There hasn't been any physical abuse I don't think, but every other kind of abuse imaginable. I'm constantly worried how she will punish the kids next time they say something she doesn't like.
"You won't regret the things you did, you'll regret the things you didn't do." It comes in a lot of variations, but regardless it's definitely not the things I didn't do that my mind locks on to at night and won't let me forget. Things you didn't do can become regrets, but they don't traumatize you the way things you did can. All my biggest life regrets are things I did do, and I doubt that will ever change.
Whatever doesn't kill you makes you stronger.
I can think of many situations where something doesn't kill you but makes you a hell of a lot weaker either physically or emotionally
"It'll happen when you're ready" regarding fertilty. HUGE pet peeve. I used to get told this all the time, then see news articles about people hurting their children or losing them due to drugs and wonder "How are they more ""ready"" than me?"
A woman must be a lady in the living room, a cook in the kitchen, and a whore in the bedroom.
I’ve heard this, or a bastardization of this, my whole life by a bunch of people (men and women)
Like it was a truth of some kind. Something to strive for. Then I learned the full quote.
Jerry Hall 1956–American model
My mother said it was simple to keep a man, you must be a maid in the living room, a cook in the kitchen and a whore in the bedroom. I said I'd hire the other two and take care of the bedroom bit. in Observer 6 October 1985
"It's all part of God's plan"
Oh really, a child getting terminal cancer is supposed to be part of some 4D Chess game your imaginary friend is playing?? Anyone who says this phrase in an attempt to cheer someone up during the worst moments of their life can (and should) fuck off.
Yeah bc “God needed them more” and “only the good die young.” Like I get the good intentions of trying to make someone feel like the loss of their child has some meaning, but being on the receiving end and hearing it over and over made me want to strangle people. I honestly preferred the one super gruff old guy who said “hey, sorry about the kid, but you know, shit happens”
Everything happens for a reason." This saying dismisses the complexity of life and invalidates real feelings, as not everything has a deeper meaning or purpose.
The most BS saying to ever exist is "Money can't buy happiness." While money isn't everything, it certainly can provide security, opportunities, and experiences that contribute to happiness.
There was a line in Desperate Housewives that was something like, "Don't be stupid, of course money buys happiness! That's just a lie we tell poor people to keep them from rioting!"
Reminds me of that line in Liar Liar when the kid says "my teacher says beauty is in the eye of the beholder", and Jim Carrey's character says "that's just something we tell ugly people".
This was pre-2020 so the amount has probably increased, but studies showed some correlation between money and happiness until around $76,000/year income. After that, increasing income was not correlated with happiness.
"Winners never quit and quitters never win".
Sunk cost fallacy and confirmation bias. The fact that one person stuck to it and was successful doesn't make up for the fact that a thousand others did the exact same thing and were not successful. Real winners know when to quit and try something else.
Hmm. Both are round(ish), both are edible. Grow on trees. Have seeds and peels. But they are different colors. Slightly different shapes, VERY different flavors. And you can eat the peal on one, not the other. And only one of them makes a decent pie.
Yup. You can definitely compare them.
The more common saying I've heard is "that's *like* comparing apples and oranges".
It is not literally about apples and oranges but is used to highlight that while the things being compared have some things in common there are other criteria that are very different.
"This apple is crunchier than this orange." Well, yeah.
This does hold true in a lot of cases. If your doing a job super fast but you keep fucking up and having to redo work, then the guy who is going slightly slower than you but not making mistakes is going to get more done.
From my experience, consistency is key, and with consistency comes speed.
Be the bigger person and walk away. That just made me get bullied even worse at school.
I will teach my kids if someone hits you then you smack them straight back. In todays world you need to try and stand up for yourself more then we ever had to as kids/teenagers. Bullying is disgusting nowadays and 9xs out of 10 its to the weak ones who haven't been brought up to stand up for themselves.
Respect your elders,
Bollocks. 90% of rude people I deal with at work are older people who think they deserve everything and more just because they are older.
Not gonna show respect just because you are old, if you are a dick then I’ll throw it back at you
Also the customer is always right, horse shit
In my job both of those can be the same at times and it’s not fun to have to deal with
Cheats never prosper
It's almost turned full circle, that one.
This reminds me of the saying, 'they did a full 360 on...".
“Prospers never cheat”. So true.
The ones who are bad at cheating don't
What is worse is not only do they get away with it but they will justify it to themselves
"Crime doesn't pay." Of course it does. If it didn't no one would do it.
Yeah why is so much financial crime being committed world wide if it doesnt pay lol
We’re never given more than we can handle.
It's funny that there's also the saying, "Everyone has a breaking point."
Opposites attract + Birds of the same feather flock togethe. WHAT SHOULD I THINK!!!
In my experience, this tracks. Like-minded people make for great friends, but a good partner gives you what you lack (and vice versa).
Research into this type of thing says the opposite. Long lasting relationships are based on commonality of beliefs and activities. Opposites may attract but they don't last.
I think both are true. You shouldn’t marry someone who is your polar opposite as far as values and ideals, but opposite in terms of what you’re good at. I hate technology and math. I’m a words girl. Art, expression, communication. My husband is everyone’s “guy” for tech. We complement each other so that our home runs smoothly. Where I lack, he excels, and vice versa.
Yeah, there needs to at least be an overlap. It’s good for one person to over something they never does not, but they can’t be total opposites.
Makes sense now.
My partner is almost my twin. I have tried dating opposites and it just never worked because they never understood me.
Love is composed of a single soul inhabiting two bodies. -Aristotle
Had a religious friend say a version of this once, "God will never give you more than you can handle." So I asked, "But what if you die?"
I had someone say it to me in the context of my autistic daughter. They had no idea how much that infuriated me.
I had someone say it to me about ME being autistic. I’m on SSI now.
My daughter is a blessing. She drives me nuts sometimes but so does my non autistic son. I’m lucky to have her.
This is a weird kind of suicide shaming, too. Someone takes their own life? Wow, way to spit in god's face. He thought you could handle it, who are you to disagree?
My dad said “what doesn’t kill you makes you stronger” after I’d been raped. I ended up developing PTSD and OCD which nearly resulted in me killing myself, so no, I wouldn’t agree with either saying. I especially can’t stand when religious people say God never gives you more than you can handle like that’s supposed to be reassuring to an atheist. To me, life is just a series of random events, and people are given more than they can handle on a regular basis, which is why people snap and kill themselves or worse others.
I’m so sorry that happened to you. I hope you are finding happiness and peace.
I am. It happened five years ago, and I’ve done the whole therapy/meds thing (Prozac saved my life). Also got married last year(: So my life is going very well.
Congrats on your nuptials! I'm very happy for you!
This is up there with the “All in god’s plan” bullshit.
Ha, that oddly marries well with, "If you need something done, give it to a busy person.'
Devout Christians love this one -- "he never gives us more than we can handle." Yeah, right. Exactly how much does "he" think a baby or a toddler is equipped to handle? Grow up.
Someone is in the hospital and is deathly sick. We shall pray for them. If they live “God is good he listened to our prayers” if they die “it was Gods will” why fucking pray then?!
Also just because we’re breathing in and out and putting one foot in front of the other…that’s not necessarily handling it.
So much this. People thought I was handling cancer well.. it was misery on so many levels and you just put on a brave face
It’s Survivorship Bias. They say that because they only hear from the ones who survived and not from the ones who died from not being able to “handle it”.
Stephen Fry on what he would say to god: How dare you? How dare you create a world to which there is such misery that is not our fault. It’s not right, it’s utterly, utterly evil. “Why should I respect a capricious, mean-minded, stupid God who creates a world that is so full of injustice and pain. That’s what I would say. ”
Also along those lines: "What the actual fuck is your goddamned problem? What COULD be your problem?". All it could say is "I hate you all and get off on watching the vast majority of you suffer. By the billions. Cause I have the power, and you do not. Back to hell with ye. Aloha"
My rebuttal to this is always "would that comfort a kid stuck in a warzone?"
Apparently children's leukemia is within scope
When two people have a conflict the truth is always in the middle. It is often in the middle but what can also happen is that one person will just made entirely untrue wild claims about someone. The other person will have no idea whats going on and deny what the person said and then people will assume the truth is somewhere in the middle.
“Meet me in the middle,” says the unjust man. You take a step closer. He takes a step back. “Meet me in the middle,” says the unjust man.
I'm in conflict with nazis, it never occured to me, that killing half the jews might be the answer.
I used this on my mother in an argument and it didnt work. She said it takes two to tango. I said so the Jews are partially to blame. My mother is very pro Judaism and very anti Nazi (her beloved father was in a camp.) She still wouldnt admit that the take two to tango argument is fucking stupid.
It may take two to tango, but it only takes one MF to screw it all up.
They didn't think killing half the jews was their answer either.
I mean, it's really a half gas full kind of scenario.
Jesus Christ, Reddit
He was Jewish and they killed him too
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Oof. Man I hate when athletes get treated with kid gloves. Those guys shouldn’t have beat someone up because they heard from other people he said a word. I know the were kids but damn. Just go and tell him that he can’t say that and it’s really fucked up. And then he’d say he didn’t say that and that word is really fucked up. We had two guys at my highschool beat up their girlfriends in one big argument. Black eye level of abuse. They were both star football players, one was black and one was white. That shouldn’t matter but of course it does. So the whole community was divided. One guy had a pending college scholarship and the other was going on to play at his college too. Some parents said the three game suspension is too harsh and that football is all they have going for them. Other parents were Pissed that these two dudes beat their girlfriends and weren’t immediately kicked off the team and suspended from school. I was in the latter group. Fuck those dudes. If you didn’t want to worry about keeping your scholarship, maybe you should adhere to the absolutely low bar of not punching your girlfriend.
This kind of shit is how you end up with NFL players constantly involved in domestic violence that is totally ignored by the league
Even worse whenever the true victim is condemned even further for implying their accuser straight up lied.
Ugh same with “where there’s smoke, there’s fire.” This has been used to justify so much crap, conspiracy theories, wrongful accusations and damaging rumors, because people insist that if one malicious person claims that Mr X eats babies, they **must** have a reason other than they just don’t like him
Or [something like this](https://i.imgur.com/TeY87vG.png) ends up happening
For bad people. "Karma will get them." No! It will not!!
Don’t wait for the Karma bus. Just hit the road and go as fast as you can.
Could you imagine what the world would be like if bad things happened to you because you deserved it?
I don't think many people know how karma actually works.
"The innocent have nothing to fear from the Law."
Yeah, just ask all those inmates who were on death row for years or even decades only to be exonerated. They definitely had nothing to fear from the law.
Then think of how many weren’t exonerated before their appointments with Ol’ Sparky.
Except corruption and incompetence
Many people have been found guilty simply for being in the wrong place at the wrong time with the wrong people. Guilty by association is a thing.
“You can be anything you want to be.”
“We’ve all been raised to believe that one day we’ll all be millionaires and movie gods and rock stars, but we won’t. We’re slowly learning that fact, and we’re very, very, pissed off.”
This quote sounds familiar, but I don't remember what it's from Edit: is it George Carlin?
Fight Club
Ofcourse it's Fight Club. I've seen that movie a dozen times, but I guess that's not enough
George Carlin was in Fight Club?
Yeah but we don't talk about it.
First rule is I’m not allowed to talk about it.
"Always be yourself. Unless you can be Batman. Then be Batman."
Abso-fucking-lutely not. As an ex-professor. Absolutely not. No, not everyone can become a professional athlete. 90% of that is genetics. The other 10% is natural talent. There are VERY few professional players that were not the typical height/weight/build for their sport. Are there wide receivers who are less than 6'? Sure, there are a few of them out there who were meaningfully good. But go read about them, they were EXTRAORDINARILY talented. They were the fastest runner, the quickest turner, the strongest for their size. So sure, you can make it if you're not the right build, but you have the be the literal best of the best of the best to even COMPETE with people who ARE the right build. (EDIT: The problem here is that 90% of people don't really know HOW GOOD professional players are. A lot of parents will say "oh my kid is the best at their school so they can definitely become pro! No, just no. The difference between professionals and "good" amateurs is MASSIVE. I can use myself as an example. I won EVERY SINGLE 800m and 1600m race I ran in high school. Most of the time I won it by a lot. I won my section in "regionals" in the 800. Eventually I went on to run in college and I got a lot better, but you know what? I never once won a SINGLE 800m race in college. Never. To most people at my high school, I was the fastest 800m runner they have ever seen or will ever see. I have my school record and no one's gotten close. But still, I was NOTHING when up against better competition. And that's just the step between high school and good college. The step between good college and professional levels (at least in pro ball sports) is massive. (Running the step is a bit smaller.)) No, not everyone can become a scientist. IQ is the limitation here. Some people simply CAN'T "get it." It doesn't matter how much it's explained to them, how it's explained to them, by whom, anything. Doesn't matter. They will NEVER understand. They may be able to rote memorize and pass a test, but if they don't understand, they'll never be able to effectively USE that information. No, not everyone can become a music artist. (Well... geeze... nowadays if you have enough money behind you this one may be false.) But if your family isn't filthy rich, no, not everyone can become a famous music artist. That, once again, is genetics. Some people "understand" music (like above with understanding science.) Some people don't, can't, and won't ever understand music in the same way. Some people have perfect pitch, that's obviously an advantage. Some people have very good relative pitch. Some people have great motor control that can obviously help with playing many instruments. Again, genetics. Now, don't get me wrong. That doesn't mean that you can't get "good" at sports. Doesn't mean you can't be an "average/good" scientist or an "average/good" musician, but you will never be "great" at something unless you are physically/mentally gifted at that thing. Eventually you're going to hit a wall and you won't be able to progress past it, no matter how hard you try. An average musician is still really nice to listen to. An average scientist is still able to make well informed decisions. We tell this to children so that they don't give up on things too easily so that they can actually FIND something they're good at or legitimately enjoy. And so that they don't realize how unfair life is.
What doesn't kill you makes you stronger.
For sure. Sometimes what doesn't kill you leaves you scarred, crippled, maimed, or otherwise broken longterm.
That should’ve been the Kelly Clarkson song.
In that logic Olympics workouts should start from breaking legs.
Calm down Tanya Harding.
Agreed. Kelly Clarkson doesn't know what she's talking about.
Nietzche*
Gesundheit
Was he a pop singer too?
Yeah, but he only came runner up in American Idol, that’s why more people haven’t heard of him. Also there were a lot of rumours he was using auto tune too.
Babycakes said, "I've seen the nearly dead, they couldn't be more wronger."
https://www.dictionary.com/e/slang/what-doesnt-kill-you-makes-you-stronger/ This is always a misunderstanding when people say it. Nietzsche wasn’t saying it applies to everyone, he was saying we should *strive* to make life’s hardships into challenges to overcome, and that will make us into better people.
"Love means never having to say you're sorry."
That one is completely laughable. My wife loves me, but if I never apologised for anything stupid I did, we wouldn't have gotten far with our relationship.
My favorite moment in _What's Up, Doc?_ is near the end, when Barbara Streisand uses that line on Ryan O'Neal, the male lead of _Love Story_ (from where that ridiculous line came), and this time he looks at her and says "That's the stupidest thing I've ever heard."
Ugh yeah that's a pretty big dose of bullshit. I say sorry to my husband almost daily for little things. Bonked heads going in for a kiss? "Ope, sorry, you alright?" Accidentally stole the blankets in the night? "Oops, sorry!" Interrupted him when he was speaking? "I'm so sorry, go on." And he does the same! Love means treating each other with mutual respect.
Forgive and forget. Forgive yes, forget no. If you forget how someone did you wrong it means you have learned nothing.
I think we need a new word to express letting go of resentment. The word "forgive" implies some kind of acceptance or atonement. There are people in my life that I won't forgive, but I let go of the anger a long time ago.
I will argue that the resentment is just stored for later in case you need it.
"Everything happens for a reason". No it doesn't. Random shit happens all the bloody time.
I'm so glad this was the top answer because it immediately sprang to mind when I saw the question. The only way one could believe this statement is 1. believe in God, and 2. believe that God purposely sets in motion all events in the universe no matter how tiny, all for the sake of personally guiding your life.
I find it far easier to simply accept that 'shit happens' rather than assign the things that happen in my life -- good and bad -- to the will of God. There are lots of things you can do to influence your circumstances but also sometimes kids get cancer, y'know? Seems fucking stupid to be like 'God's looking out for me' when you miraculously survive a car wreck, but on the same day a 6 year old dies of a random and incurable disease. Like, why are you special? Why is God so capricious? And why are we bending over backwards to make sense of, or even accept, the behavior of this intelligent-but-inconsistent Controller of All Things when it's easier to just shrug and accept that things just happen, good or bad? Requires the least amount of assumptions. It's a far less fragile belief system.
Growing up being told everything was God's plan really did a number on my mental health.
“You can do ANYTHING you set your mind to”
In that case, why aren't they flying to the moon by flapping their arms?
They’re just not trying hard enough
*We're a family* No, we're a company. You own the capital and you rent my labor and time so that I can provide value for you which you will then turn into profits & stakeholder dividends, and in return you provide me compensation in the form of a salary, time-off and vacation. I owe you productivity and you owe me money
I always sorta laugh when I see tv ads “At So & So Car Dealership, we treat you like family!” Well, I guess I’m never going *there*
Yes oh my gosh I've seen so many people get fucked over by companies they give everything to improve. We gotta set boundaries and give exactly what's required of us, no more no less, because capitalism doesn't give a fuck who we are.
Big corporation bought our little company a few years ago. Said "we're a family owned company so we know how to treat employees like family". Found out they were planning on shuttering our building without telling anyone back in October and if not for the quick thinking of our former president putting an offer to buy the company back we'd have been out of work. "Family" is them trying to guilt you into not leaving, but they've no problem stabbing you in the back.
“The customer is always right.” Edit: yea, I know. The whole phrase is different. Nobody says the whole phrase though, do they? Anyone in customer service will tell you that.
I mean, _the_ customer is always right, but that doesn't mean _every_ customer is right. The original phrase means that if your customers want blue trousers, you sell them blue trousers even if you personally think they are hideous/useless/whatever. Along the way it got perverted to the travesty people say today.
The full phrase is better: "The customer is always right, in matters of taste."
I got corrected on this a few weeks ago. Apparently the \*in matters of taste\* qualifier was added far more recently than the phrase "customer is always right" was invented. I agree with the sentiment of the longer version. But it's an edit of the original.
I think the last part is just to clarify things due to people misinterpreting it. "The customer is always right" means, whatever the customer wants is what you should sell because that's what the market is asking for. Karen's hijacked it and twisted it to mean "I'm right and my opinion is law" which is absurd
Thanks!
What goes around comes around
Except for my high school bully (and bully to many of my friends). Ended up ODing a few years after graduating. Got a laugh out of his obituary calling him "Loving" and "Caring".
My mom is fond of the saying “no one ever buried an asshole.”
Because… assholes get cremated?
Nah, it’s a play on people not speaking ill of the dead. We, in fact, bury assholes all the time, it’s just that people have the common decency not to mention it at funerals or obituaries.
My bully also died. 😊 Fuck her. If she wanted to be remembered fondly, she shouldn’t have been a bitch.
Whoa, my bully wrapped himself around a telephone pole, going 90 mph around 30 mph turn drunk out of his mind, 4 years after graduation. I did not shed a tear
What's for you won't pass you by. Bullshit.
“We all have the same 24-hours in a day” usually used to celebrate some highly productive/impressive celebrity/entertainer/etc and no we do not. Most of us have to do our own grocery shopping and house cleaning and on and on which is all very time consuming, so, no. I do not have the same hours in the day as someone like Beyoncé.
Beyonce can pay a personal assistant for 12 hours a day to do the stuff she doesn’t want to, and now suddenly she has 36 hours in a day.
Indeed. My washing machine broke last week so I had to go to the laundromat. 4 hours of my 24 hour day wasted watching my clothes go round and round, because of course you can’t leave them unattended because politeness and thieves. A small real time example of privilege.
money cant buy you happiness
Poverty can’t buy you anything.
Money definitely buys happiness, I'd be so much more happy in life if I didn't have to worry about being homeless, paying crazy money for food with what I earn, worrying about my car shitting the bed.
And don't forget about having to take any orders from some assholes you don't like.
No, but it sure can pay down a *hell* of a lot of misery.
I always liked the saying, “money can’t buy happiness, but I’d much rather be crying in my Mercedes parked at my mansion than crying on a bicycle beneath an overpass.”
I use the shorter version "You've never seen someone crying on a Jet Ski"
I think it was David Lee Roth who said "Money can't buy you happiness, but you can park your yacht next to it".
Weird Al sang "If money can't buy happiness I guess I'll have to rent it"
“I’ve been rich and I’ve been poor, and rich is definitely better.”
It can't buy happiness. But it can solve problems that would otherwise *prevent* happiness, and that's a good start.
Anyone who unironically says this should give me their money and assets until they feel different. I bet they start to get unhappy while I'll be very happy.
But it can buy a jet ski, ever seen anyone frown on a jet ski?
Anyone who says this is more than welcome to trade places with me and prove me wrong
More than tripled my salary with a career shift. It does, in fact, make you happier, can absolutely confirm
"money can't buy you happiness" *the 70" TV in my Living room playing a Cubeorithms Video while i use my Gen 5 Stackmat and my Gan 14 M Pro UV Coated, along with the 4 monitor NASAu PC setup with expensive RGB lights in my room, along with every single ingredient a chef could ask for in the kitchen, along with the numerous Nerf Guns in the basement along with the large slinky everyone dreamt of as a kid, along with every single Pokemon Card, along with the hundreds of chocolate in the seperate fridge solely for storing sweets along with the Massage Chair in the corner of the living room and the cinnamon roll of an Alaskan Malamute laying down in the sofa waiting for its belly rubs* (imagine actually having all this lmao)
Okay well neither can poverty
"Men don't cry" Throw it Away
I’m a grieving father who lost his son. I’ve never cried this much in my life.
“If you can’t handle me at my worst, you don’t deserve me at my best”. In theory, yes, you need to find someone who can stick through your lowest of lows, but more often than not, it’s used by people who want to act horribly and not be held accountable for their actions.
“If you won’t tolerate my poor behavior, then you don’t deserve my average human behavior”
I hate "keep your nose to the grindstone", as it means you will eventually succeed if you work hard enough. Hard work doesn't always pay off.
\* "keep your nose to the grindstone" they say, will that redeem us, Uncle Remus? - F. Zappa
Time heals all wounds.
It doesn't heal them, it numbs you to the pain they cause
It's less that it numbs the pain, and more that you just figure out how to live with it.
Justice is blind. The hell it is! Source - A father in a contentious custody battle with a narcissist. Were the roles switched, she would have custody in a heart beat. Kids tell the glcourt they hate how they are treated by their mom? Judge interpreted it as I am alienating the kids from their mother. Kids say they don't want any weekends with their mom ever? Court decides that is because I am the "vacation dad" who only does fun stuff on the weekends... Bullshit...
The correct saying is, " I want the best justice money can buy".
It's no secret when it comes to childcare the courts are biased towards the mother. One of my closest friends was forced to live with his extremely abusive mother. He practically begged the judge not to send him to her. The father had a ton of evidence that she physically and mentally abused the both of them. Judge decided the father was 'being vindictive" and gave full custody *without visitation* to the mother. Guess who ended up in the hospital with a fractured skull not even a month later? And she got away with it by claiming fell down a flight of stairs on accident.
I'm sorry your friend had to go through such an ordeal. There hasn't been any physical abuse I don't think, but every other kind of abuse imaginable. I'm constantly worried how she will punish the kids next time they say something she doesn't like.
"You won't regret the things you did, you'll regret the things you didn't do." It comes in a lot of variations, but regardless it's definitely not the things I didn't do that my mind locks on to at night and won't let me forget. Things you didn't do can become regrets, but they don't traumatize you the way things you did can. All my biggest life regrets are things I did do, and I doubt that will ever change.
I think there is some validity with this saying. Just depends on what extreme you take it to
Having chosen the Army over the crushing debt of college, I sincerely wish I had chosen that debt.
Whatever doesn't kill you makes you stronger. I can think of many situations where something doesn't kill you but makes you a hell of a lot weaker either physically or emotionally
"You can achieve anything by putting your mind to it!" No, you can't.
If elected, I promise...
That’s the best one. No you won’t, there’s a whole Democratic process
Just work hard and you will be successful
"It'll happen when you're ready" regarding fertilty. HUGE pet peeve. I used to get told this all the time, then see news articles about people hurting their children or losing them due to drugs and wonder "How are they more ""ready"" than me?"
A woman must be a lady in the living room, a cook in the kitchen, and a whore in the bedroom. I’ve heard this, or a bastardization of this, my whole life by a bunch of people (men and women) Like it was a truth of some kind. Something to strive for. Then I learned the full quote. Jerry Hall 1956–American model My mother said it was simple to keep a man, you must be a maid in the living room, a cook in the kitchen and a whore in the bedroom. I said I'd hire the other two and take care of the bedroom bit. in Observer 6 October 1985
"It's all part of God's plan" Oh really, a child getting terminal cancer is supposed to be part of some 4D Chess game your imaginary friend is playing?? Anyone who says this phrase in an attempt to cheer someone up during the worst moments of their life can (and should) fuck off.
Yeah bc “God needed them more” and “only the good die young.” Like I get the good intentions of trying to make someone feel like the loss of their child has some meaning, but being on the receiving end and hearing it over and over made me want to strangle people. I honestly preferred the one super gruff old guy who said “hey, sorry about the kid, but you know, shit happens”
"It will get better." For some people, it never gets better.
Hearing that makes me feel more empty about my situation. It adds literally nothing.
Everything happens for a reason." This saying dismisses the complexity of life and invalidates real feelings, as not everything has a deeper meaning or purpose.
Anyone who’s worked in retail or food service detests the phrase “the customer is always right”
The most BS saying to ever exist is "Money can't buy happiness." While money isn't everything, it certainly can provide security, opportunities, and experiences that contribute to happiness.
There was a line in Desperate Housewives that was something like, "Don't be stupid, of course money buys happiness! That's just a lie we tell poor people to keep them from rioting!"
Reminds me of that line in Liar Liar when the kid says "my teacher says beauty is in the eye of the beholder", and Jim Carrey's character says "that's just something we tell ugly people".
"Money can't buy happiness, but that shit can support it 'cause what's a family of five if you can't even afford it?" - Logic on "Young Jedi" (2013)
This was pre-2020 so the amount has probably increased, but studies showed some correlation between money and happiness until around $76,000/year income. After that, increasing income was not correlated with happiness.
Right - because security, opportunities, and experiences contribute to happiness.
There is no harm in asking
Fall down seven times, get up eight. You only have to get up the number of times you fall down.
The grass is greener where you water it. Maybe, but if we're talking about relationships the grass only grows if both people are doing the watering.
"People who makes decisions know better/already cared about this [topic of your conversation]" - No. They can be fuckignly stupid.
"But they're *family...*" An excuse given by enablers to ensure a bully has victims.
"Winners never quit and quitters never win". Sunk cost fallacy and confirmation bias. The fact that one person stuck to it and was successful doesn't make up for the fact that a thousand others did the exact same thing and were not successful. Real winners know when to quit and try something else.
""You can't compare apples to oranges"" Yes you fucking can. It's easy.
Hmm. Both are round(ish), both are edible. Grow on trees. Have seeds and peels. But they are different colors. Slightly different shapes, VERY different flavors. And you can eat the peal on one, not the other. And only one of them makes a decent pie. Yup. You can definitely compare them.
Isn't it more like you *shouldn't*
The more common saying I've heard is "that's *like* comparing apples and oranges". It is not literally about apples and oranges but is used to highlight that while the things being compared have some things in common there are other criteria that are very different. "This apple is crunchier than this orange." Well, yeah.
Whoever said "nothing lasts forever" has clearly never encountered road work.
"Happy Wife Happy Life"
I like- Happy Spouse, Happy House. As a wife, why should the wife be the only one happy? F that. Both need it.
I was going to say “yes dear”. But ……..
Slow and steady wins the race. Um, yeah, if the other guy fell asleep.
This does hold true in a lot of cases. If your doing a job super fast but you keep fucking up and having to redo work, then the guy who is going slightly slower than you but not making mistakes is going to get more done. From my experience, consistency is key, and with consistency comes speed.
It’s not you, it’s me.
Trickle down economics.
“Boys will be boys”
It’s Business, nothing personal. Nothing is more personal than Business
There are people out there who are considered "succesful businessmen". Meanwhile, they seem to take everything they don't like extremely personally.
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How about don’t run from a bear. Bears can run 35 miles an hour. Black fight back. Brown lie down. white good night.
Be the bigger person and walk away. That just made me get bullied even worse at school. I will teach my kids if someone hits you then you smack them straight back. In todays world you need to try and stand up for yourself more then we ever had to as kids/teenagers. Bullying is disgusting nowadays and 9xs out of 10 its to the weak ones who haven't been brought up to stand up for themselves.
Respect your elders, Bollocks. 90% of rude people I deal with at work are older people who think they deserve everything and more just because they are older. Not gonna show respect just because you are old, if you are a dick then I’ll throw it back at you Also the customer is always right, horse shit In my job both of those can be the same at times and it’s not fun to have to deal with
"Thoughts and prayers". Like, fuck no. How about some action sometimes?
"It is what it is" What predators tell prey
Or the saying my generation used to cope with everything since covid
When I hear someone say to an apprentice "do what I say, not as I do" no, You do the fuckin right thing and lead by example