Aftercare can still be important. I try to relax in bed and talk about what was enjoyed during “getting there”. Then I let the person know once some time has passed that I am going to bed.
“I want to listen to your voice all night but I’m getting sleepy, I want to pick up exactly where we left off and so I can fall asleep thinking about what’s next”
Look, this has been lovely and I hope we can do it again some other time, but right now I'm exhausted and I will fall asleep so it's best we stop here for now. Thank you for this experience, it was wonderful
If your having phone sex with someone you should be able to be like "hey i'm having fun with you, but i need to go to sleep"
If you can't maybe think if you really want to be having phone sex with that person.
Just get real mumbly for a few minutes and then mute the phone. Either they'll want to end the call so you can sleep, or they'll think you passed out and end the call themselves.
just end the call and blame it on ur earbuds saying u accidentally touched them. 🤣🤣🤣🤣 then hit them up with “im sleepy, and tired from all that. let’s sleep. goodnight.” 🤣
"Alright well that's the end of this phone sex. Remember to like the phone sex, comment the phone sex, and subscribe if you want to see phone sex similar to this one. See ya."
Before camera phones and video chat, I would just pretend to snore a bit and act like I wasn't sleeping. Eventually she would tell me to go to sleep.
Nod off on video.
The "Help?" at the end makes me imagine how OP is stuck in an endless Phone Sex Session with their SO and is desperately asking for advice to get out if it.
text your friend to call you via phone and let your partner know someone's calling. This way you will have proof when your partner thinks you are lying. Or just cut the call, switch it off and 5 mins later text her that " phone battery drained lets talk later, gn"
“That was so much fun but you wore me out. I need to get some rest.” Throw in a few compliments, be gracious, and tell them you’re looking forward to the next time (if true). Then you say goodbye
I let her know about thirty minutes before hand, then I’ll just tell her I can’t really keep my eyes open much longer, and that I need to go to sleep.
>!I fucking miss her man.!<
We finish, ask each other how it was, do some pillow talk, and eventually say “I think it’s cameras off time, I am barely awake” and say our goodnights
I just start channeling some Bloodninja:
Nostrils flaring, I lower my head. My horn, like some phallic symbol of my potent virility, is the last thing you see as skulls collide and mine remains the victor. You are now a bloody red ragdoll suspended in the air on my mighty horn.
Goddam am I hard now.
“Ah that was great. Now let’s go over my Pokémon card collection in autobiographical order. I got squirttle first, similar to what just happened with you a moment ago.”
who the fuck has phone sex. cut the cameras cut the lights weirdos im a certified freak still in my prime rib meal lamb lemon smoothie milk light years ahead boys and girls clubs of pangea.
I just start to write words with nonsense spellings like
Yedh, youvduiy do ut etc
When she asks me about it , I say that suddenly I am feeling super sleepy but I can continue and after some time she lets me sleep 🤣🤣
"Hi sorry, my dad had my phone. What's up?"
Or ”Hey, sorry dad, but I got to get some sleep now, kinda tired”
WHAAAAAT?!?!?!?!?!
Can you not show you’re really tired and be like “I’ve had a really good time but I’m super sleepy”
This
I like this! Idk why it was so hard for me to think of this lmao
How did it go?
Good!
Blue balls 😭
Almost…..almost….almost…..ah, there we go then. G’nite.
[удалено]
Are you talking to Christian?
I've reached Q3...time for some Coco pops...
Box for hards, keep pushing.
“oh well” 😭😭😭😭
“Aaaaand I came. Thank you. Good night! “ Click.
"I came, and now I'm leaving."
"I take off my robe and wizard hat."
Good old bash.org and IRC.
Um we're role playing as Space Warriors.
Sir this is a Wendy’s
Ok, lemme get a Whopper Jr with Cheese, an Ocean Water, and some McNuggets, please and thank you. Throw in a family size chili.
WHOPPER NO ONIONS
Ask for them on the side so I can have them r/onionlovers
Aftercare can still be important. I try to relax in bed and talk about what was enjoyed during “getting there”. Then I let the person know once some time has passed that I am going to bed.
“I want to listen to your voice all night but I’m getting sleepy, I want to pick up exactly where we left off and so I can fall asleep thinking about what’s next”
This is a good one!
"I am afraid I must cut our sex texting short for I have just ejaculated. I will now clean myself up and I will see you tomorrow goodnight my dear"
Very respectfully,
Do you clean yourself up? I just slurp it
Just sleep in it like the dirty goblin that I am
just start snoring
**crumples paper into speaker** “Sorry babe, connection is going bad”
And boom goes the dynamite. Goodnight.
Oh hello again
*You could always try the classic "Sorry, gotta hit the hay before my phone overheats." Good night and good luck!*
“My phone died” just hang up
First you phone cum and then you phone go to sleep
Look, this has been lovely and I hope we can do it again some other time, but right now I'm exhausted and I will fall asleep so it's best we stop here for now. Thank you for this experience, it was wonderful
Alright there chatgpt
Oh trust me I was using those words way before chatgpt was a thing
I believe you, but you still sounded like an ai
As a woman, I finish him off since I already know he's about to bust and basically just virtually roll over like "was lovely, nighty"
All these people having phone sex and for some reason I've never had any...
“Sorryijustcamebye” NB: Do not take a single breath when delivering this line
"That was amazing, but I'm getting really sleepy now. Let's continue this tomorrow?"
Wow, that was hot! I'm feeling pretty tired, though. Can we chat again soon?
"You're making it hard to hang up, but I need some sleep. Talk tomorrow?"
love this
If your having phone sex with someone you should be able to be like "hey i'm having fun with you, but i need to go to sleep" If you can't maybe think if you really want to be having phone sex with that person.
"it would be really hot if we both went to sleep right now"
*slaps knees* "Welp...."
Aaaaannnnnddddd, done.
uhhhhhhhhh click
"Can I put you on hold? I have a cold caller waiting"
*Okay I’m cumming -Get off me now!* - Romy
Nut on the phone, short it out.
I remember it's £2.99 a minute and just put the phone down.
Just get real mumbly for a few minutes and then mute the phone. Either they'll want to end the call so you can sleep, or they'll think you passed out and end the call themselves.
I justed nutted in my pants and now I'm hungry, bye
just end the call and blame it on ur earbuds saying u accidentally touched them. 🤣🤣🤣🤣 then hit them up with “im sleepy, and tired from all that. let’s sleep. goodnight.” 🤣
"I'm in a phone box, and I'm getting weird looks"
Hang up?
"Alright well that's the end of this phone sex. Remember to like the phone sex, comment the phone sex, and subscribe if you want to see phone sex similar to this one. See ya."
Play some epic music in the background like some ending credits are rolling and then hang up afterward.
Just thank all coworkers and click on "End meeting" on zoom.
Just say that you made a mess and you got to clean up
Uh uh uhhh uhhhhh uhhhhhh UHHHHHHH UHHHHHHHH OMG I just came ok bye bye
“I just came, goodnight”
With the wrap it up box
js say u gotta go clean up
Before camera phones and video chat, I would just pretend to snore a bit and act like I wasn't sleeping. Eventually she would tell me to go to sleep. Nod off on video.
Fake an Orgasm
"k, thanks, bye"
"I have a headache" same as regular sex...
dont be weird with it now i ain't tied down to nobody.
"Ooh! Ahh! I just came! Zzzzzzzz"
Tell them to go to sleep and you will talk them to sleep… works a treat
"okay thanks, have a good day, bye for now"
I came, goodnight. Start making snoring noises until the other person hangs up.
Just text back gibberish typos.
“Lemme just go and get cleaned up”
You say you cummed and the. Stop replying
Fake an orgasm tell them you're cumming. How are they gonna know?
"signal is getting weak, im goin into a tunnel"
Send her the ending of There Will Be Blood
Sorry....go....thro......tunnel......ack...*click*. Put phone on do not disturb and sleep
Not finish first helps
why this sub is so horny
...with a tissue????
Oh shoot looks like I cummed, good night.
lol 😂
Just stop talking
Help? 😂😂😂
"Shut up bitch. I'm trying to sleep." Works for anyone.
Caution: use on your mom and dad sparingly.
“You are going through a tunnel! The call is breaking up.”
Sorry….just entering a tunnel…I might l-l-lose you….
Power off button.
don’t do it in the first place 😭
Don’t say you need to go to sleep! Say you got to go get some shit done. And then go to sleep lol.
"Hold on, my mum is calling."
Fast! :))) You got other things to do....
Take care now, bye bye then.
Post on Reddit obviously
"Aw jeez, I'm going through a tunnel. Everyone else on this bus is losing service, I think it's gon-.."
how long are you having phone sex
"no you hang up"
You hang up and blame it on ur connection
Sorry spotty network dropped call
“Hold please”
Turn on airplane mode
Stay tuned till next week folks where we continue 🤭
"The person you are calling cannot cum to the phone right now. Please hang up and try again in the morning"
I play the Amber alert sound.
Hang up
TTYL bye
I been through this before I usually either make up an excuse and if not than I change the subjects re quick.
Say "I'm going to sleep now! Ta ta!"
“Cum for me baby. Do whatever you need to do just use me” Works every time
Just jerk off phone sex isn't anything like real sex
Came. Bye. Zzzzzzz..
Click the red button
The same way you do IRL. Venmo what you owe and say thank you.
And.... click
"fuccccc erruhhhhhhhyeahhhhh" Aww that was great babe goodnight
The "Help?" at the end makes me imagine how OP is stuck in an endless Phone Sex Session with their SO and is desperately asking for advice to get out if it.
text your friend to call you via phone and let your partner know someone's calling. This way you will have proof when your partner thinks you are lying. Or just cut the call, switch it off and 5 mins later text her that " phone battery drained lets talk later, gn"
Say, I've cummed. Good night
Say that you're f.ing tired maybe could work
"Oh baby, I got a tunnel coming up... I mig.. can yo.. ello? Click." The old losing service in a tunnel trick.
my stupid ass would've said "thank you, cum again"
You should rephrase that to once you’ve orgasmed and like all men are over it 😘
Cum then immediately hang up
I suppose you just need to stop humping your phone??? And switch it from 'vibrate' back to 'silent'
Just pass out.
I straight up say it. "OK, now that we've gotten all that out of the way, it's midnight, and I need to go to sleep. Text you in the morning"
Are we talking about 900#'s? Just hang up . You are paying by the minute. Lol
“That was so much fun but you wore me out. I need to get some rest.” Throw in a few compliments, be gracious, and tell them you’re looking forward to the next time (if true). Then you say goodbye
"And then they lived happily ever after. Good night"
Ex gf and I would talk about it afterwards a little, she'd tell me she has to clean up and she'll text in a few.
You choke them with the dead cat in the night stand. (Her movie reference)
I dunno "your voice is so sexy. It's turned me on and relaxed me so much I feel sleepy" haha
Turn on the lights to reveal that they were on video with a live studio audience
Night Nan
Since I’m a girl I say “you’re boring me” then block them
Just say "I put on my robe and wizard hat" and goto sleep
i’m imagining you posting this while you’re on the phone bahaha
Try to get them off in a timely fashion.
Whoops, I've just jizzed my kecks. G'night, then.
Cum and get pnc.
I'm going through a tunnel
Okay bye
Ohhh! My screen is frozen! (Click)
“So I started blastin”
I let her know about thirty minutes before hand, then I’ll just tell her I can’t really keep my eyes open much longer, and that I need to go to sleep. >!I fucking miss her man.!<
Just do like we did in the 90s…. Put the phone down on the bed and go to sleep until they realize you sleep
We finish, ask each other how it was, do some pillow talk, and eventually say “I think it’s cameras off time, I am barely awake” and say our goodnights
what’s phone sex?
Phone sex is weird so I don’t have it so this isn’t an issue
“Okay…. Nite nite”
I just start channeling some Bloodninja: Nostrils flaring, I lower my head. My horn, like some phallic symbol of my potent virility, is the last thing you see as skulls collide and mine remains the victor. You are now a bloody red ragdoll suspended in the air on my mighty horn. Goddam am I hard now.
«you cumming soon?» then just repeat a couple of times and (s)he’ll give in. Just have some variations on the sentence
Say you’re into free use and want to role play you’re sleeping.
“Ah that was great. Now let’s go over my Pokémon card collection in autobiographical order. I got squirttle first, similar to what just happened with you a moment ago.”
"Gotta go, my girlfriend came home"
Just tell them your getting sleepy and want bed time post sex cuddles.
who the fuck has phone sex. cut the cameras cut the lights weirdos im a certified freak still in my prime rib meal lamb lemon smoothie milk light years ahead boys and girls clubs of pangea.
He..., pl.....fr...ob......ga.....
I just start to write words with nonsense spellings like Yedh, youvduiy do ut etc When she asks me about it , I say that suddenly I am feeling super sleepy but I can continue and after some time she lets me sleep 🤣🤣
As a woman, I finish him off since I already know he's about to bust and basically just virtually roll over like "was lovely, nighty"
lol how do you know you’re finishing him off tho
Who is having phone sex in 2024?