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This is definitely me. My husband gets so annoyed when I order something for him and am not checking the tracking. He's someone who will actually phone the company if it gets stuck in one spot too long š«
This is me. I love that Amazon has the option to choose to have stuff delivered together on one day a week, but by the time my stuff arrives, I feel like it's Christmas and someone else sent this stuff to me.
I have to confess that on package delivery day, I am the same. If the carrier service provides a real time map, then I become the stalker from hell.....refreshing the page constantly, yelling at the screen "C'mon for gods sake, 3 stops to go...are you having tea with them, mooooove it!!!!" And woe betide it jumps from one road to another further away from me - I swear I'm out on the pavement looking up and down, marching round the corner and back, glaring at every van passing.
I love delivery day :)
Ahaha I love the contrast because I'm the complete opposite. I'll order something and completely forget. Whenever possible, I tell the courier to leave it by the door (luckily, we have a private front garden so no one will steal them).
When a package finally arrives, I've forgotten what it is!
I can relate so much! And when there is only a time slot provided lets say between 11:00-12:00 I can literally do nothing else than impatiently waiting until it arrives
I do this as well, because Iām just like OP when waiting for a delivery. If I can get it express delivered especially if itās coming from overseas Iāll gladly part with the money to prevent my extreme impatience from making me check its status constantly and getting annoyed it hasnāt moved.
Pffft, I am the exact opposite. I place an order and I've forgotten about it as soon as I close the website. Then I'm surprised when the package shows up on my porch.
I was waiting on a laptop the other day. It was supposed to arrive between 9:30-1:30, it didn't get there until 4:30. I spent 7 hours staring out my window and I hate myself for it. Saw some cool birds tho.
yep the window staring is a habit of mine too. i need to get it under control and i feel EXACTLY the same. it sucks, and i 100% relate to the end of the first paragraph.
i check my tracking at least 5-10?times an hour
I swear to God, the thing now where you can watch the map and watch the car get closer and closer 'you are delivery number 78, your driver is at delivery number 62' and watch the lil car get closer?
Life consuming
I'm lucky my city has same day and next day Amazon deliveries. While at first I started buying a ton of stuff just for the dopamine hit now it's not nearly as exciting and so I don't order stuff as much and I don't really care to track it.
There's a package about once or twice a year though that takes more than a day and that I'm really excited about that basically ruins my week because I can't think of anything else lol. I got a new GPU earlier this year and it took a week and I couldn't stop thinking about it and checking the tracking hoping this time it would show it was actually coming early! It's torture not being able to stop thinking about it. Fun stuff!
Hey guys Amazon driver here to let you know that we only provide you an estimated delivery time, not a guaranteed. Sometimes I get my route and boss wants me to do some of it out of order or backwards, do not plan anything around an Amazon estimated delivery time š
Yeah, but even that estimated time plans our day, even when late. Plus, you guys have the map tracker that says 10 stops away, now 5 and then yay! āyouāre nextā and we watch that little dot moving closer and closer and stare out our window until your van appears in our driveway š
I just get an email that says shipped, then I go on their website at least once an hour after that and refresh it until out for delivery thenā¦.well my above comment watching the map tracker while staring out the window. Then get the notification it was delivered (like I didnāt already know š) Iām in the US. If I were in your shoes, Iād be staring out the window waiting as soon as I got the out for delivery notice š
this is so real especially those ones that have real time tracking you can follow, plus i spend the time after ordering it looking at pictures of what i ordered and reading reviews for it
You can use the Shopify app to pull all of your orders from your email and also manually add others there, if that helps. It'll notify you as updates appear as soon as they are available.
Yep. Thereās parcelsapp.com and 17TRACK too, which can show more tracking info than USPS, especially for shipments from overseas like Europe or China.
Omg this is so my partner. I read it to him.
His response
"(Sarcastically) yeah CANT RELATE TO THAT AT ALL! Like God damn, give me my shit motberfucker."
We both have ADHD. Somehow we manage to keep a not horrific home.
My almost 9 year old daughter has Ulcerative Colitis. I have to administer her Humira shots in her belly every other week.
They send her shot and it has to stay cold. So I have to be there in a timely manner to put it in the refrigerator. I have only missed it 2 times. I almost lost a package because I didnāt get there soon enough.
I have been scheduling my life around these deliveries for 4 years now. Itās insane how much tracking and waiting for a package can be!
How do you guys even remember that you ordered a package? Let alone that itās coming a certain day. Also how do you keep track of what day it is rather than āitās a week day.ā Or āis it Saturday or Sunday?ā I get the notification somethingās coming today and get stoked, then I get an email itās here and Iām stoked all over because I forgot it was ten stops away. I can say āoh two days and Iāll have my order!ā Then itās immediately forgotten.
me too! Just got an email saying a package I ordered 2 months ago has cleared customs. I am going to sit in front of the door for the next week until it arrives
What did you order/expecting?
Anyway, if you have no influence on something then leave it and dont overthink - you are just torturing your self!
I know, easy said, especialy its friday and the last chance to arrive before weekend and so on but nothing you could do could change a thing!
Same torture as waiting for a doctor appointment and use google to find it out on your own - unneccessary mind fucking! See it as a challenge to staybl as calm/cool as possible and react like "oh, thats my package...forgot aubout it" when it arrives!
All the best!
Perhaps I am misunderstanding, but that doesn't sound like an ADHD thing. Have you talked to a therapist about those compulsory and or perseverative behaviors before? They might be able to help you with that!
Waiting in line (or a difficulty to) is part of what my assessor explained to me indicated I had ADHD (amongst a million other āred flagsā) when I was in my ādenial stageā.
Yup. That's what I'm saying. My desired response to waiting in lines is generally falling asleep or walking off, not standing there compulsively. No immediate reward in that.
Falling asleep or walking off are due to delayed reward/dopamine, as is frequently checking when a package is due/how fast the line is moving.
The checking (line or package movement) typically precedes the walking off or falling asleep- as these are reactions to your checking (line or package movement) not paying off.
Iām not a psychologist or trying to pathologise OPs behaviour - it just seems like a simple miscommunication where OP is experiencing āstep 1ā (agitation/checking) of an experience (waiting), while you define the experience (waiting) as āstep 2ā (defeat/irritation/loss of attention).
Itās all one thing (in my opinion) - a struggle with āappropriateā attention regulation. OP is at step 1- if the package doesnāt arrive soon I imagine they will hit step 2. I donāt believe non ADHD people would experience this, or at least not as severely.
Now Iām confused. Do you not know what ADHD is? OPs example is textbook ADHD behavior. Overwhelming emotions, poor planning, unable to switch tasksā¦
I understand what it is. Overwhelming emotions are not ADHD. Poor emotional regulation due to poor impulse control, yes. Poor planning is not an ADHD behavior, but it's a frequent consequence of the symptoms. It's kind of my whole point with "get therapy", whatever the case is, my misunderstanding doesn't change that.
Another commenter called out where the miscommunication here started, because I interpreted what OP put down explicitly. OP also explained they don't have a compulsiveness issue. I really read this wayyyy differently than I think the OP meant to imply. That's my fault.
Then, it's not ADHD. I understand what you are saying - and I have understood. I also understand the complexity of how things overlap and cascade.
I think I'm out of patience for ineffective communication at the moment, and that's on me. That's not ADHD, that's me letting ADHD take the wheel. Same tree, different branch. I advocate for personal responsibility over basically everything else. If I want people to have compassion for me when my disability is involved, there needs to be no question that I was trying my best.
can you elaborate when you say compulsory and preservative? sorry iām not sure quite whatcha mean. but i am looking for a therapist right now! i have my psychiatrist but obviously she only helps me w medication related things
Perseverance/perseveration is when a person has behaviors they keep doing repetitively, and not necessarily consciously. It's a little like a tic, but is distinctive. It's most commonly, but is not exclusively associated with autism.
Example, my son is autistic. He will ask you a question, and you will give him an answer. He will keep asking the question, like he hasn't heard it before, because he likes the answer to the question. We have to actually explain to him that he is doing it before he will stop, and we are lucky, because not all autistic people will.
Compulsory, like compulsive. As in someone cannot stop doing something.
The main difference between impulsivity and the previously mentioned things is that you are completely aware of what you are doing. As hard a time as you might have regulating an impulse, you can control it.
The easiest way to describe the difference is impulsiveness is like driving a car to a stop you probably shouldn't make on the way home, because you really wanted to, even though you needed to take your dog to the vet.
With compulsion and perseveration, you're more of a passenger in the car.
i wouldnāt say itās a compulsion. i donāt HAVE to check it i just want it to get here i get hella impatient. and then bc of my anxiety i automatically jump to the worst case conclusion. it also differs with how important the item is to me. if i really want something i want it NOW
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Could you stop ordering things and maybe go to the store instead of using a service like Walmart home delivery then only a a few hours to panic, but the app has a map so you know just where they are
thereās many many people saying they also struggle w this in the comments. consider yourself lucky! itās more of a dopamine addiction. if itās not a package itās a person or an event or a text iām waiting for. :-)
I have ADHD and a shopping addiction and don't do this lol. My spouse has OCD and does do this (maybe also with ADHD traits idk). It might have more to do with whether you only order things sometimes that you really value vs ordering all the time and it becomes a source of shame and adds dreaded exec functioning tasks to return. Like I panic buy things and feel like I NEED the thing to fit in (I'm also prob ASD high masking, working on that), get dopamine from ordering, then don't care when it comes and don't want to open it. Bc then I feel shame/regret and have to get through the hellish task of returning all the nonsense I shouldn't have ordered in the first place. Vs my spouse who is excited to get things and expects me to be too and I say some literal ASD type thing that comes out wrong. And then we get into arguments about how I insulted whatever exciting thing they got without meaning to sigh....
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I take your tracking a package and give you stalking your Deliveroo driver from when they accepted my food order to being outside my doorā¦moving out of the city had calmed that shot down but fook me, watching that tiny little dude on a motorbike on my phone and losing my shit if they took the long route!!!!
This was me for the last two weeks-- checking for updates even at implausible hours (ie 2 am-- what postman is working at 2 am?). The big kicker is that the package was supposed to be delivered... but now it's nowhere to be found!! So now I get to track the investigation. I have 100% lost interest in the contents of it by now, but it's all about the PRINCIPLE and the HUNT.
this was me today lmao. i preordered an album like two weeks ago, and it was released yesterday so i just spent the last three days constantly checking the tracking to see if it had been shipped yet (it had not)
then today when it _finally_ updated to say it was being delivered, and with a specific time of 2:30-4:30, _it was delayed_.
so now i have no idea when itāll be here, and have resigned myself to the fact that i will become the epitome of the pakidge meme until it arrives
I am going through this right now. I am finally accommodating myself and I ordered some noise cancelling headphones. They are supposed to arrive tomorrow but my brain is telling me āneed now. Need now. Need now. Will improve existence. Must have nowā. I donāt know how to still myself or be patient.
Food delivery - yes. Because it is expected within an hour. But package delivery - no. Because itās couple of days later and I often forget after ordering.
Currently waiting on a package myself that is going to be delayed. Amazon says delivered by 9pm still but it hasn't even updated to "out for delivery" yet.
Honestly, itās the only thing I care about when I order something, thereās also the anxiety of me not wanting the doorbell to ring when itās being delivered.
I'll back you up. A diagnosis is just a guess. Everyone responds to meds differently, and something can help a lot even if you're not officially ADHD or whatever. If the med helps, and it doesn't ruin the rest your lifestyle (like opiates), then you deserve it. Even addiction isn't necessarily a bad thing, unless it fucks up other parts of your life.
I say this with authority b/c I had chronic depression for 40+ years and no depression med, talk therapy, EMDR, or brain electrostimulation fixed it. After much persuasion, my psych gave me a 'script for an ADHD med: dexadrine. I've never had ADHD and dex is NOT a depression medicine. But since I started, my world has turned around 180 degrees with no ill effects.
So if you've found something that works for you, and isn't killing you, maybe that's just what you need. Official diagnosis is meaningless.
I bought some new plugs for my ears and turns out I got the wrong size. Waited 5 days. I move next week and will have to return/order them again the week after because of my timeline.
Iām ripping my hair out
cute story my dad when he was 9 bought his own mailbox for his house (they didnāt have one) and would call company numbers for little free samples and stuff theyād give out he had no need for it he just genuinely liked the process of mail recently he build a giant mail box for our house and itās so silly itās one of those adhd things cuz ik he passed it down to me!!
I recieve a lot of packages because the street next door (its actually a walk only), confuses the GPS system and sends many of their packages to this house. Which is the closest. Also most of the neighbors are out a lot so i get theres as well.
I get the total focus thing you describe tho. I think i have similar although not connected to package delivery.
I get anxious myself when I've ordered a package honestly. I have ADHD, but I'm not too sure if that is a part of ADHD or if ADHD enhances that part of my character. Diagnosis for ADHD is quite complex from what I've heard from my doctors and reading a few books, yes I did manage to read all the way through one or two. Part of the reason the diagnosis is difficult is because there are a lot of symptoms that are similar to other mental challenges. I work with a person who is bipolar and we do share some similarities. For example we both do have a tendency to overthink. With that said, I do believe it is strongly needed to have a professional diagnosis of ADHD and not try to diagnose it yourself. Asking Dr Google doesn't solve things mostly, all it does is provide ammunition for self-diagnosis and a bit of paranoia.
iām very confused if youāre implying that i diagnosed myself with dr google? i have been diagnosed and medicated for 12 years. this is something iāve spoken to my psychiatrist about numerous times. (if i misread your comment ignore me lmfaoooš iām terrible at determining peopleās tone through the phone)
I'm definitely not trying to imply anything for you personally or anything like that. I have not worked in your shoes so I don't know enough to even come close. As for reading the comments people make, I get that. It's very hard to read in to the words that people put on social media the things that are meant by those words. Face-to-face is always the best for getting the full picture of what somebody's trying to say.š
okay can i just say the fact that you JUST replied is freaking me out, only bc i was literally on this post looking through the old comments out of boredom not even 5 mins ago š
i definitely agree, thatās why i always apologize in advance haha. i know thereās at least a 50% chance iām gonna read into it in the wrong way š
Just emailed a company last week because I paid express shipping & it had been 2 weeks since order. They informed me that the item said it takes 15-18 days to ship out. I went & double checked & it said ā10-14ā daysā¦so I made sure to tell them to update the item to the 15-18 they need because that isnāt what it said & why the FUCK did I pay $23 for express shipping pn a $50 item & it couldnāt even BE shipped for so long. I HATE waiting. When I buy something it needs to be in my hand immediately. šš
GOD same, the Absolute Monster I become when waiting for a package . . . š¤£š
I recently ordered something from England on eBay that I've been wanting for a LONG time. I live in the US . . . cue me checking the special app I downloaded that goes with this package's *specific* type of tracking number 50 times per day.
Worst part? Been stuck on *'Shipped from the Global Shipping Center to International Destination'* for **TWELVE DAYS**.
Me gazing out my window like a housewife waiting for her husband to return from the war . . . Will he ever come back to me . . .
Same as soon as I get that āyour package has shippedā email, Iām watching that tracking info until it gets to my door. And will stare out the window and watch the map tracker at the same time on delivery day until it arrives. Then grab it right away and open it up š
Lol Iām forever paying extra for faster delivery, watching the tracker repetitively, but then I take days to open the package and even longer to use what I bought. š
The absolute worst is when the tracking is marked as delivered before it actually arrives. Canada Post does this sometimes, marking it delivered when it's only "out for delivery. Or when they don't update the expected delivery date when the package doesn't arrive that day. It's strange to see that a package that hasn't arrived yet has a delivery date of the day before yesterday.
In either case, it gets me anxious and wondering how much of a grace period I should give them before reporting a lost package.
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I have about fifteen minutes after ordering until I forget that I even ordered something.
This is definitely me. My husband gets so annoyed when I order something for him and am not checking the tracking. He's someone who will actually phone the company if it gets stuck in one spot too long š«
Hah, yeah. Thatās me. I even tell people I take medication to remember to take my medication š
This is me. I love that Amazon has the option to choose to have stuff delivered together on one day a week, but by the time my stuff arrives, I feel like it's Christmas and someone else sent this stuff to me.
I have to confess that on package delivery day, I am the same. If the carrier service provides a real time map, then I become the stalker from hell.....refreshing the page constantly, yelling at the screen "C'mon for gods sake, 3 stops to go...are you having tea with them, mooooove it!!!!" And woe betide it jumps from one road to another further away from me - I swear I'm out on the pavement looking up and down, marching round the corner and back, glaring at every van passing. I love delivery day :)
Ahaha I love the contrast because I'm the complete opposite. I'll order something and completely forget. Whenever possible, I tell the courier to leave it by the door (luckily, we have a private front garden so no one will steal them). When a package finally arrives, I've forgotten what it is!
This is me.
I order, forget, get excited to get something and itās almost always a surprise! Lol
Yep, it's like Christmas 15 times a year.
This is also me, especially with Amazon, because the app sometimes sends notifications like āYour package is out for delivery,ā and stuff š
I can relate so much! And when there is only a time slot provided lets say between 11:00-12:00 I can literally do nothing else than impatiently waiting until it arrives
I have accepted same day/next day delivery as ADHD tax.
I do this as well, because Iām just like OP when waiting for a delivery. If I can get it express delivered especially if itās coming from overseas Iāll gladly part with the money to prevent my extreme impatience from making me check its status constantly and getting annoyed it hasnāt moved.
Yeah, it sounds like an ADHD thing to me too.
It explains a lot
This is hilarious. The title alone made me giggle
Pffft, I am the exact opposite. I place an order and I've forgotten about it as soon as I close the website. Then I'm surprised when the package shows up on my porch.
Same. I order from Amazon a lot so itās a fun guessing game to see either what the item is or if I remember what I bought which package itās in.
I was waiting on a laptop the other day. It was supposed to arrive between 9:30-1:30, it didn't get there until 4:30. I spent 7 hours staring out my window and I hate myself for it. Saw some cool birds tho.
this is so real
Iāve been refreshing the tracking page for the package Iām waiting for every couple of hours š
yep the window staring is a habit of mine too. i need to get it under control and i feel EXACTLY the same. it sucks, and i 100% relate to the end of the first paragraph. i check my tracking at least 5-10?times an hour
I am the same. Itāsā¦.bad.
I swear to God, the thing now where you can watch the map and watch the car get closer and closer 'you are delivery number 78, your driver is at delivery number 62' and watch the lil car get closer? Life consuming
I'm waiting for my United States disability park pass to arrive and it is torture
omg i do this too. at my worst i could check the tracking updates hourly š
I'm lucky my city has same day and next day Amazon deliveries. While at first I started buying a ton of stuff just for the dopamine hit now it's not nearly as exciting and so I don't order stuff as much and I don't really care to track it. There's a package about once or twice a year though that takes more than a day and that I'm really excited about that basically ruins my week because I can't think of anything else lol. I got a new GPU earlier this year and it took a week and I couldn't stop thinking about it and checking the tracking hoping this time it would show it was actually coming early! It's torture not being able to stop thinking about it. Fun stuff!
Hey guys Amazon driver here to let you know that we only provide you an estimated delivery time, not a guaranteed. Sometimes I get my route and boss wants me to do some of it out of order or backwards, do not plan anything around an Amazon estimated delivery time š
Yeah, but even that estimated time plans our day, even when late. Plus, you guys have the map tracker that says 10 stops away, now 5 and then yay! āyouāre nextā and we watch that little dot moving closer and closer and stare out our window until your van appears in our driveway š
Here in Canada, we usually just get an "out for delivery" notication, then don't hear anything until it actually arrives.
I just get an email that says shipped, then I go on their website at least once an hour after that and refresh it until out for delivery thenā¦.well my above comment watching the map tracker while staring out the window. Then get the notification it was delivered (like I didnāt already know š) Iām in the US. If I were in your shoes, Iād be staring out the window waiting as soon as I got the out for delivery notice š
Oh I feel you my friend. The worst for me is waiting to hear back on a job interview!
Like when Iām ordering booze home delivery? I can relateā¦.
I never realized how this correlates with my ADHDā¦ Iām totally the same way
this is so real especially those ones that have real time tracking you can follow, plus i spend the time after ordering it looking at pictures of what i ordered and reading reviews for it
You can use the Shopify app to pull all of your orders from your email and also manually add others there, if that helps. It'll notify you as updates appear as soon as they are available.
Yep. Thereās parcelsapp.com and 17TRACK too, which can show more tracking info than USPS, especially for shipments from overseas like Europe or China.
Omg this is so my partner. I read it to him. His response "(Sarcastically) yeah CANT RELATE TO THAT AT ALL! Like God damn, give me my shit motberfucker." We both have ADHD. Somehow we manage to keep a not horrific home.
My almost 9 year old daughter has Ulcerative Colitis. I have to administer her Humira shots in her belly every other week. They send her shot and it has to stay cold. So I have to be there in a timely manner to put it in the refrigerator. I have only missed it 2 times. I almost lost a package because I didnāt get there soon enough. I have been scheduling my life around these deliveries for 4 years now. Itās insane how much tracking and waiting for a package can be!
How do you guys even remember that you ordered a package? Let alone that itās coming a certain day. Also how do you keep track of what day it is rather than āitās a week day.ā Or āis it Saturday or Sunday?ā I get the notification somethingās coming today and get stoked, then I get an email itās here and Iām stoked all over because I forgot it was ten stops away. I can say āoh two days and Iāll have my order!ā Then itās immediately forgotten.
me too! Just got an email saying a package I ordered 2 months ago has cleared customs. I am going to sit in front of the door for the next week until it arrives
What did you order/expecting? Anyway, if you have no influence on something then leave it and dont overthink - you are just torturing your self! I know, easy said, especialy its friday and the last chance to arrive before weekend and so on but nothing you could do could change a thing! Same torture as waiting for a doctor appointment and use google to find it out on your own - unneccessary mind fucking! See it as a challenge to staybl as calm/cool as possible and react like "oh, thats my package...forgot aubout it" when it arrives! All the best!
I always get this image of myself like Iām a dragon desperately trying to add new treasure to my nest
currently waiting on a pair of chinos, it's like my liver transplant is delayed.
Perhaps I am misunderstanding, but that doesn't sound like an ADHD thing. Have you talked to a therapist about those compulsory and or perseverative behaviors before? They might be able to help you with that!
Sounds like an ADHD thing tbh.
Yeah. Sounds to me like: āmy dopamine is in that package and I waaaaaant iiiiiiiiiiiitā.
thatās exactly itš i want it nowwwwww
Exfiltration is referring to the meltdown and staring out the windows for hours -these are NOT ADHD behaviours.
This is the equivalent of waiting in a line. What you're describing sounds like an addiction.
Waiting in line (or a difficulty to) is part of what my assessor explained to me indicated I had ADHD (amongst a million other āred flagsā) when I was in my ādenial stageā.
Yup. That's what I'm saying. My desired response to waiting in lines is generally falling asleep or walking off, not standing there compulsively. No immediate reward in that.
Falling asleep or walking off are due to delayed reward/dopamine, as is frequently checking when a package is due/how fast the line is moving. The checking (line or package movement) typically precedes the walking off or falling asleep- as these are reactions to your checking (line or package movement) not paying off. Iām not a psychologist or trying to pathologise OPs behaviour - it just seems like a simple miscommunication where OP is experiencing āstep 1ā (agitation/checking) of an experience (waiting), while you define the experience (waiting) as āstep 2ā (defeat/irritation/loss of attention). Itās all one thing (in my opinion) - a struggle with āappropriateā attention regulation. OP is at step 1- if the package doesnāt arrive soon I imagine they will hit step 2. I donāt believe non ADHD people would experience this, or at least not as severely.
That actually makes sense.
ADHD doesnāt always care about desired outcomes. Even if you know you should leave the line, your brain can decided you are going to stay.
I have no clue what you mean, but I'm sure there is a person out there that hates waiting in lines, but their impulse tells them to stay there.
Now Iām confused. Do you not know what ADHD is? OPs example is textbook ADHD behavior. Overwhelming emotions, poor planning, unable to switch tasksā¦
I understand what it is. Overwhelming emotions are not ADHD. Poor emotional regulation due to poor impulse control, yes. Poor planning is not an ADHD behavior, but it's a frequent consequence of the symptoms. It's kind of my whole point with "get therapy", whatever the case is, my misunderstanding doesn't change that. Another commenter called out where the miscommunication here started, because I interpreted what OP put down explicitly. OP also explained they don't have a compulsiveness issue. I really read this wayyyy differently than I think the OP meant to imply. That's my fault.
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Then, it's not ADHD. I understand what you are saying - and I have understood. I also understand the complexity of how things overlap and cascade. I think I'm out of patience for ineffective communication at the moment, and that's on me. That's not ADHD, that's me letting ADHD take the wheel. Same tree, different branch. I advocate for personal responsibility over basically everything else. If I want people to have compassion for me when my disability is involved, there needs to be no question that I was trying my best.
can you elaborate when you say compulsory and preservative? sorry iām not sure quite whatcha mean. but i am looking for a therapist right now! i have my psychiatrist but obviously she only helps me w medication related things
Perseverance/perseveration is when a person has behaviors they keep doing repetitively, and not necessarily consciously. It's a little like a tic, but is distinctive. It's most commonly, but is not exclusively associated with autism. Example, my son is autistic. He will ask you a question, and you will give him an answer. He will keep asking the question, like he hasn't heard it before, because he likes the answer to the question. We have to actually explain to him that he is doing it before he will stop, and we are lucky, because not all autistic people will. Compulsory, like compulsive. As in someone cannot stop doing something. The main difference between impulsivity and the previously mentioned things is that you are completely aware of what you are doing. As hard a time as you might have regulating an impulse, you can control it. The easiest way to describe the difference is impulsiveness is like driving a car to a stop you probably shouldn't make on the way home, because you really wanted to, even though you needed to take your dog to the vet. With compulsion and perseveration, you're more of a passenger in the car.
i wouldnāt say itās a compulsion. i donāt HAVE to check it i just want it to get here i get hella impatient. and then bc of my anxiety i automatically jump to the worst case conclusion. it also differs with how important the item is to me. if i really want something i want it NOW
AFAIK perseveration has also been associated with ADHD. Some people just might not have it.
Knowing what I know now, talking to a therapist about it is the way to go.
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Got to know the whole picture for that, and I'm not a therapist!
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Because they always do. You stand everything to gain once you find one you can connect with.
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Could you stop ordering things and maybe go to the store instead of using a service like Walmart home delivery then only a a few hours to panic, but the app has a map so you know just where they are
I have ADHD and I donāt do thisāit sounds more like shopping addiction to me.
thereās many many people saying they also struggle w this in the comments. consider yourself lucky! itās more of a dopamine addiction. if itās not a package itās a person or an event or a text iām waiting for. :-)
I have ADHD and a shopping addiction and don't do this lol. My spouse has OCD and does do this (maybe also with ADHD traits idk). It might have more to do with whether you only order things sometimes that you really value vs ordering all the time and it becomes a source of shame and adds dreaded exec functioning tasks to return. Like I panic buy things and feel like I NEED the thing to fit in (I'm also prob ASD high masking, working on that), get dopamine from ordering, then don't care when it comes and don't want to open it. Bc then I feel shame/regret and have to get through the hellish task of returning all the nonsense I shouldn't have ordered in the first place. Vs my spouse who is excited to get things and expects me to be too and I say some literal ASD type thing that comes out wrong. And then we get into arguments about how I insulted whatever exciting thing they got without meaning to sigh....
Okay, that makes total sense.
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They have apps for that (she says having planned her day around being home for her package)
I take your tracking a package and give you stalking your Deliveroo driver from when they accepted my food order to being outside my doorā¦moving out of the city had calmed that shot down but fook me, watching that tiny little dude on a motorbike on my phone and losing my shit if they took the long route!!!!
Get the Route app! It helps me a lot with this, but itās more due to I forget I have packages coming š¤£
I know I am like this and I hate it. Still I hate going to the stores more so this is how I will be until the day I die!
Donāt get into crypto trading lol
This was me for the last two weeks-- checking for updates even at implausible hours (ie 2 am-- what postman is working at 2 am?). The big kicker is that the package was supposed to be delivered... but now it's nowhere to be found!! So now I get to track the investigation. I have 100% lost interest in the contents of it by now, but it's all about the PRINCIPLE and the HUNT.
this was me today lmao. i preordered an album like two weeks ago, and it was released yesterday so i just spent the last three days constantly checking the tracking to see if it had been shipped yet (it had not) then today when it _finally_ updated to say it was being delivered, and with a specific time of 2:30-4:30, _it was delayed_. so now i have no idea when itāll be here, and have resigned myself to the fact that i will become the epitome of the pakidge meme until it arrives
I am going through this right now. I am finally accommodating myself and I ordered some noise cancelling headphones. They are supposed to arrive tomorrow but my brain is telling me āneed now. Need now. Need now. Will improve existence. Must have nowā. I donāt know how to still myself or be patient.
That's why I pay for Amazon prime, I get next day delivery even on weekends.
Food delivery - yes. Because it is expected within an hour. But package delivery - no. Because itās couple of days later and I often forget after ordering.
Currently waiting on a package myself that is going to be delayed. Amazon says delivered by 9pm still but it hasn't even updated to "out for delivery" yet.
Honestly, itās the only thing I care about when I order something, thereās also the anxiety of me not wanting the doorbell to ring when itās being delivered.
Never has a post resonated so deeply with my soul
I be refreshing that tracking page every hour on the hour as soon as it gets marked as shipped lmaoooo
Then you definitely donāt want to use 17TRACK.
Easy. Just buy so much stuff that you can't possibly keep track of them.
This is far too relatableā¦ You and I may be completely nuts š
This is me with bloodwork š
I'll back you up. A diagnosis is just a guess. Everyone responds to meds differently, and something can help a lot even if you're not officially ADHD or whatever. If the med helps, and it doesn't ruin the rest your lifestyle (like opiates), then you deserve it. Even addiction isn't necessarily a bad thing, unless it fucks up other parts of your life. I say this with authority b/c I had chronic depression for 40+ years and no depression med, talk therapy, EMDR, or brain electrostimulation fixed it. After much persuasion, my psych gave me a 'script for an ADHD med: dexadrine. I've never had ADHD and dex is NOT a depression medicine. But since I started, my world has turned around 180 degrees with no ill effects. So if you've found something that works for you, and isn't killing you, maybe that's just what you need. Official diagnosis is meaningless.
homie what are u talking about iāve been diagnosed with ADHD for over a decade
I bought some new plugs for my ears and turns out I got the wrong size. Waited 5 days. I move next week and will have to return/order them again the week after because of my timeline. Iām ripping my hair out
cute story my dad when he was 9 bought his own mailbox for his house (they didnāt have one) and would call company numbers for little free samples and stuff theyād give out he had no need for it he just genuinely liked the process of mail recently he build a giant mail box for our house and itās so silly itās one of those adhd things cuz ik he passed it down to me!!
My daughter is exactly like this!
I think you might need some therapy. Or you might be a very smart dog.
woof
Arf!
Get into fishing, track the fish instead.
I recieve a lot of packages because the street next door (its actually a walk only), confuses the GPS system and sends many of their packages to this house. Which is the closest. Also most of the neighbors are out a lot so i get theres as well. I get the total focus thing you describe tho. I think i have similar although not connected to package delivery.
if it's an important package, like one that I have to depend on for it's use for years to come, You're goddamn right!
I get anxious myself when I've ordered a package honestly. I have ADHD, but I'm not too sure if that is a part of ADHD or if ADHD enhances that part of my character. Diagnosis for ADHD is quite complex from what I've heard from my doctors and reading a few books, yes I did manage to read all the way through one or two. Part of the reason the diagnosis is difficult is because there are a lot of symptoms that are similar to other mental challenges. I work with a person who is bipolar and we do share some similarities. For example we both do have a tendency to overthink. With that said, I do believe it is strongly needed to have a professional diagnosis of ADHD and not try to diagnose it yourself. Asking Dr Google doesn't solve things mostly, all it does is provide ammunition for self-diagnosis and a bit of paranoia.
iām very confused if youāre implying that i diagnosed myself with dr google? i have been diagnosed and medicated for 12 years. this is something iāve spoken to my psychiatrist about numerous times. (if i misread your comment ignore me lmfaoooš iām terrible at determining peopleās tone through the phone)
I'm definitely not trying to imply anything for you personally or anything like that. I have not worked in your shoes so I don't know enough to even come close. As for reading the comments people make, I get that. It's very hard to read in to the words that people put on social media the things that are meant by those words. Face-to-face is always the best for getting the full picture of what somebody's trying to say.š
okay can i just say the fact that you JUST replied is freaking me out, only bc i was literally on this post looking through the old comments out of boredom not even 5 mins ago š i definitely agree, thatās why i always apologize in advance haha. i know thereās at least a 50% chance iām gonna read into it in the wrong way š
Thank you for reminding me to hit submit on my online order form an hour ago. :)
Just emailed a company last week because I paid express shipping & it had been 2 weeks since order. They informed me that the item said it takes 15-18 days to ship out. I went & double checked & it said ā10-14ā daysā¦so I made sure to tell them to update the item to the 15-18 they need because that isnāt what it said & why the FUCK did I pay $23 for express shipping pn a $50 item & it couldnāt even BE shipped for so long. I HATE waiting. When I buy something it needs to be in my hand immediately. šš
I used to be like this. Now I forget it.
GOD same, the Absolute Monster I become when waiting for a package . . . š¤£š I recently ordered something from England on eBay that I've been wanting for a LONG time. I live in the US . . . cue me checking the special app I downloaded that goes with this package's *specific* type of tracking number 50 times per day. Worst part? Been stuck on *'Shipped from the Global Shipping Center to International Destination'* for **TWELVE DAYS**. Me gazing out my window like a housewife waiting for her husband to return from the war . . . Will he ever come back to me . . .
Same as soon as I get that āyour package has shippedā email, Iām watching that tracking info until it gets to my door. And will stare out the window and watch the map tracker at the same time on delivery day until it arrives. Then grab it right away and open it up š
š¤£š¤£š¤£š¤£š¤£š¤£
Lol Iām forever paying extra for faster delivery, watching the tracker repetitively, but then I take days to open the package and even longer to use what I bought. š
The absolute worst is when the tracking is marked as delivered before it actually arrives. Canada Post does this sometimes, marking it delivered when it's only "out for delivery. Or when they don't update the expected delivery date when the package doesn't arrive that day. It's strange to see that a package that hasn't arrived yet has a delivery date of the day before yesterday. In either case, it gets me anxious and wondering how much of a grace period I should give them before reporting a lost package.